Venting Suicidal thoughts every night

[You]

For some months now, every night i keep having suicidal thoughts, more than anything i feel like i need to do it.
It haves to be quick, it haves to hurt and it haves to be done NOW!
Usually the next day, I wake up, and the thoughts are gone.
I hate myself, and this gay Earth, wish I could have a grenade so i can end this pain in the chest.

 

[Lost4toolong]

I feel you. I do. If death is what u want then so be it, but u want to live and just not hurt this badly. Get help. May i ask whats caused u to feel this way?

 

[akrasia]

You're not alone. My suicidal thoughts are always loud at night since everyone is asleep and it's just me and my thoughts. I would watch some netflix to try and cope my busy mind till I sleep.
How do you cope? Are you seeking any help?

 

[Imustbefree]

For some months now, every night i keep having suicidal thoughts, more than anything i feel like i need to do it.
It haves to be quick, it haves to hurt and it haves to be done NOW!
Usually the next day, I wake up, and the thoughts are gone.
I hate myself, and this gay Earth, wish I could have a grenade so i can end this pain in the chest.

May I ask about the pain in the chest? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I was just curious.

 

[sadbunny]

I hate myself, and this gay Earth, wish I could have a grenade so i can end this pain in the chest.

It's me

 

[You]

May I ask about the pain in the chest? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I was just curious.

"Pain chest" how I call it, I don't know how to describe. It's not exactly pain, it's the same as being punch, but it causes discomfort, and i want to blow a grenade on the part of the chest.

 

[Imustbefree]

"Pain chest" how I call it, I don't know how to describe. It's not exactly pain, it's the same as being punch, but it causes discomfort, and i want to blow a grenade on the part of the chest.

I empathize. I have bad chest issues. It is painful and symptom difficult to describe. That's why I am suicidal. Family is the only thing that keeps me going. I actually do want to live. Long story short I have auto immune issues and I haven't found proper treatment or meds. I have lots of suicide ideation and have rehearsed a method.

 

[Supersnakes444]

You're not alone. My suicidal thoughts are always loud at night since everyone is asleep and it's just me and my thoughts. I would watch some netflix to try and cope my busy mind till I sleep.
How do you cope? Are you seeking any help?

I'm feeling the exact same way. I want to live, but I don't want to be living like this anymore.

 

[Pan]

I too have chest pain on a regular basis; it seems to worsen at night, almost as if I release pent up daily stress at the midnight hour or so. My next door neighbor dropped dead from a heart attack two days ago. I find myself envying him...

 

[serah]

I also struggle with daily suicidal thoughts, it fucking sucks. Stay strong man.

 

[Pan]

thanx so much for your kind words. I am sorry that suicidal thoughts are part of your daily struggle. So many people I know think that $$$$ is the solution to everything. Believe me, they're wrong—-more money, more pain; more dollars more anxiety. While I may have the bucks, they mean little to me now. I hate sunny days too; I just wish it would rain, rain, rain.

 

[Pan]

Sunlight, not night, makes me think of death. Fruit that matures on the vine on Monday, for example, rots on the vine on Tuesday. Fruit of the black sun.
In Belize, life is cheap and throwaway; friends you make one week are six feet underground the next. This is what the religious call"paradise".

 

[Bct]

In my case, it's the first think on my mind when I wake up. Also having a chest pain on the left, so I can feel you.