passer-by
Home is elsewhere
- Oct 7, 2024
- 22
I have been told that living in pain is simply a punishment for being a selfish person, both now and in past lives and a way to save myself is to keep living with it and give out to others what they need, so I won't have to be born again.
Supposedly killing myself would result in me being reincarnated into much worse conditions and I would still have to go through the same thing all over again.
Now there are obviously some religious views included in this idea, and so it probably wouldn't affect everyone in the same way, not even myself since my ideology is pretty loose, volatile at best.
Yet I hate how much it stuck with me. I do understand the person who told me this is mostly basing it on their own fear, of being left alone and it's easy to call the 'book closer' selfish, as I noticed this is a strong, widely used and somehow even effective argument.
I know I'm selfish, but isn't everyone? Isn't that our most basic program?
I believe certain people might appear more compassionate and caring for others, simply because their own cups are full, so they don't have to worry only about their own well being, they can take upon more responsibility, as they have more resources(be them mental or physical) to be generous with. Some people ran out of those long time ago. Being extremely selfish is a last resort in trying to keep yourself alive, in my opinion.
This was a rant. I understand the pain I bring onto others. I remember when I used to care and had enough strength to behave better towards them. I'm simply beyond that point now. My cup is empty.
I don't know, do you think we should force ourselves to give out more, even if it feels uncomfortable, and maybe transform our own depression thanks to that?
I'm highly triggered by that idea, yet some part of me agrees with it.
But then again, I have multiple personalities, some of them still in making
I don't even know which thoughts are mine anymore.
Supposedly killing myself would result in me being reincarnated into much worse conditions and I would still have to go through the same thing all over again.
Now there are obviously some religious views included in this idea, and so it probably wouldn't affect everyone in the same way, not even myself since my ideology is pretty loose, volatile at best.
Yet I hate how much it stuck with me. I do understand the person who told me this is mostly basing it on their own fear, of being left alone and it's easy to call the 'book closer' selfish, as I noticed this is a strong, widely used and somehow even effective argument.
I know I'm selfish, but isn't everyone? Isn't that our most basic program?
I believe certain people might appear more compassionate and caring for others, simply because their own cups are full, so they don't have to worry only about their own well being, they can take upon more responsibility, as they have more resources(be them mental or physical) to be generous with. Some people ran out of those long time ago. Being extremely selfish is a last resort in trying to keep yourself alive, in my opinion.
This was a rant. I understand the pain I bring onto others. I remember when I used to care and had enough strength to behave better towards them. I'm simply beyond that point now. My cup is empty.
I don't know, do you think we should force ourselves to give out more, even if it feels uncomfortable, and maybe transform our own depression thanks to that?
I'm highly triggered by that idea, yet some part of me agrees with it.
But then again, I have multiple personalities, some of them still in making
I don't even know which thoughts are mine anymore.
