Help Struggling w/ writing suicide note

[readyforsleep]

I'm going to ctb soon (possibly tomorrow) and am writing a note to my younger siblings, but it's way more difficult than I expected. I've had three attempts before, but I have never written a suicide note. I used to believe that there was no point in leaving a note because it's impossible to truly explain everything and answer every question people might have. But this time I am feeling more guilt about leaving my younger siblings (7f, 7m, 4m, 2m). I want them to know that I love them and to minimize the pain this causes them as much as possible. I just don't know what to say. Does anyone have suggestions for what to include? I want to keep it as gentle/mild as possible because I do not know when my parents will read them the note. For anyone who had an older sibling who committed suicide is there anything that you would have liked to know? Or anything that you wish you hadn't known?

 

[HelloHell]

I was in the same situation. I've attempted before, but never wrote a note, until my recent attempt. Basically I wrote that i'm sorry for leaving, and i thanked family, friends, and acquaintances. I didnt explain much about what i was feeling, just some vague sentences (you wouldn't understand, etc, etc). I also wrote that this is the ending I chose, and nothing could've been done to prevent this. I also put a joke and quoted a song lyric that resembled what I wanted after i'm gone

 

[FuneralCry]

I know how hard it can be writing notes, but I would see it as acting as a form of closure I guess, even know I doubt it would make people feel much better. Mine would say 'now I am at peace and in a better place', things like that. I wish you well.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I'm battling this right now. I've written so many drafts of so many notes to different people. I'm hoping I have the courage to leave this coming Friday, but I want to leave a note that somehow expresses everything I want to say. I'm usually an excellent writer, but for some reason, I can't arrive at the "perfect" suicide note. Nothing I've done seems to really capture the essence of my pain and the rationale for my decision. It makes me wonder if I should even try.

 

[Dear Agony]

I have no idea if I'll leave a note for my younger brother or not. I genuinely don't know what to say, and don't think anything I can say will make it better or less traumatizing honestly. I'm thinking of just leaving a printed pic I have of us hugging when I was 6 and he was 3. We looked so happy. I want him to remember me like that forever.

 

[TooConscious]

I gave up because there's too much I hate about this world, which should be commonsense, and I see no point as stupid as I am why should someone as thick and daft as me have so much to say about this place. Because life is evil and I'm in some type of hell/torture trap, if the word mattered they would be a reality.
The people I would have wanted to have peace with on leaving (family) caused most my pain through their will full ignorance anyway. I wasted so much time on a note that nk one would appreciate but if you have people open to different ideas and forgiveness or accepting their own mistakes good luck to you.