Stopping the impulse to ctb

[seho_j]

For no reason whatsoever, my brain decided to have all the suicidal ideation in the world. I'm barely hanging on. I talked to the Samaritans, which didn't really help.
What do you do to stop the impulse of just using accessible methods to ctb when you have a bad day?

 

[SenMorta]

Make sure I am around friends, don't need to talk about it but it's not always a viable method.

 

[TheBigBurden]

I usually try to take a nap and I feel okish when I wake up.

 

[porfin1234]

Cold shower. Sleep. Eat. Anything to help keep you in body and out of your head. Look at pics of kittens. Hah

 

[Sensei]

It's difficult. I try to reason with myself calmly. "This is not right. You shouldn't do it when you're not in your right mind. Think of how it will hurt people you love."

 

[Peacefulness]

same here. You get days where you feel like this is it and then nothing happens. But that day may be on it's way soon and when it gets here then it's time for death my friend.
I guess we have to take it one day at a time and know deep down even if I die by some other way I've been giving it my giving it my honest effort and leading with love. If you feel like you haven't been leading yourself with love today then maybe we stay alive for that love tomorrow

 

[MsMaudlin]

I try to distract myself, cleaning the kitchen or something ❤

 

[SlackJim]

I'll second the cold shower! sometimes it seems to snap me out of whatever state of mind I'm in, it brings you into the present and into your body.

 

[porfin1234]

Or you could also just think of the repercussions of failing an impulsive attempt.
Hospital, thousands of dollars in bills, end up a vegetable, broken bones, paralyzed, etc.

 

[seho_j]

Thanks everyone, for the suggestions! I guess the main thing to do is distracting myself. I already try to do that, but got some new ideas here so thank you :)

 

[Flippy]

Cold shower. Sleep. Eat. Anything to help keep you in body and out of your head. Look at pics of kittens. Hah

I love cats! I really like just watching them do their cat things. Sometimes it helps. Other times not so much :-/

 

[Diceroller90]

Thanks everyone, for the suggestions! I guess the main thing to do is distracting myself. I already try to do that, but got some new ideas here so thank you :)

Few other things:
1. Remember that you have felt happiness before and if you CTB, you will never feel it again.
2. Have a long term goal, something that you can live for. Some people live for their children, some live to produce works of art, others work to help those in need. Basically this kind of goal is your way of making the world a better place. So if you die, you leave the world worse off.
3. Most suicide survivors regret attempting in the first place and never attempt again. CTB is something most regret in their final moments.

 

[gentleflower]

When I am feeling the urge to CTB, I try to distract myself as well as possible. The only thing which does sort of work for me is water. So taking a long shower or swimming.
Most of the times I resort to self harm though which grounds me again

 

[Flippy]

When I am feeling the urge to CTB, I try to distract myself as well as possible. The only thing which does sort of work for me is water. So taking a long shower or swimming.
Most of the times I resort to self harm though which grounds me again

It helps me too! I can spend hours in the bath! Managing to avoid the self halm right now. People might notice and it will bring more attention to me then I could deal with right now :-/

 

[Jean4]

I come here and scream for help. Nobody is more understanding and can talk you down better than someone in the same situation.

 

[gentleflower]

It helps me too! I can spend hours in the bath! Managing to avoid the self halm right now. People might notice and it will bring more attention to me then I could deal with right now :-/

It's good that you manage to refrain from self harm.
And I can totally forget the time under the shower. Have you ever tried sitting under the shower spray in darkness? It's so incredibly soothing to me.
I cut myself on my hip, so it isnt obvious to others at least

 

[Flippy]

I haven't taken a shower in the dark but it sounds like it could be quite soothing! One to add to the list! :-) Yeah avoiding the self harm is good. I would usually do it in places it wouldn't be seen like my arm just below the shoulder. Or there was stabbing sewing needles into my arm and doesn't leave much of a mark. I'm not trying to give people ideas here incidentally! So don't take this post as any sort of advice! :-0

 

[helpmehelpme]

I am working on separating my living self from my suicidal self with attention to my breath. Cold water therapy has helped. Picking a song to push you through it has helped me in the past. I don't have a song right now, and it's winter, and I am more depressed than I've been in 21 years, the only time I was actively suicidal.

Right now I am going to follow a leading to listen to a meditation from YouTube.

Wishing you well.

 

[Reallyreallyreally]

Healthy: subjecting myself to shower or full body immersion in very cold water, porn, binge watching a series until I fall asleep to it, several mile long walks, telling someone supportive.

Effective but definitely not healthy: food binge, self injury. These things get you high by causing physical pain. Drugs can work in the moment but weed can be terrifying if you're not a habitual user, using harder drugs you can easily end up more suicidal when you crash, and just stay far away from psychedelics in this state.



Hopefully I don't get jumped on for suggesting this but if you have the means readily available and want to short circuit the impulse but just can't do it yourself the hospital is an option. I did this once. It was super unpleasant but if you know you're just feeling impulsive and you need someone to help you stop, the psych ward's main focus is to stabilize people in crisis. Just make sure you know what you're getting into in terms of your rights.

When I went I hadn't been able to eat or sleep much to speak of for a few days and knew I wasn't being rational. It was New Year's Eve and I was running frantically from store to store trying to buy a camp stove so I could carbon monoxide myself to death, all based on a coin toss, trying not to freak out on the store employees as they did their best to find a location that had what I was looking for.

At the hospital they gave me melatonin and because that got me to sleep they didn't force me to take any other meds. It helped that I went voluntarily. They thought I was manic but I was firm in explaining that I had a raging case of PMS that happened to coincide with some crazy work stuff, hence the effectiveness of melatonin in breaking my multi day insomnia.

Like I said, though, it was really unpleasant in there. They strip search you, transport you by gurney, watch you 24/7, the bathroom doors don't lock, and you don't have anywhere private or quiet. Even away from the TV that will never turn off, people on antipsychotics can end up in a never ending back and forth shuffle that you can't get away from. But if you have the means readily available, you want to stop the impulse and truly don't think you can, this is an option.

 

[br0kenMIND72]

Gaming is my distraction and I really like listening to good music, I have my "Chill" playlist and If someone wants you can PM me. Don't know if I can post links or maybe I don't want to share my internet nickname.