Stockpiling

[CanIStopTryingNow]

I'm tempted to buy SN, not to use immediately, but to have "just in case." I know my family and doctors would think it's a bad idea to have lethal means around incase it leads me to make an impulsive attempt. I am not a very impulsive person, outside of a mixed mania (rare.) I would likely spend significant time deciding to suicide. Sometimes having a way out, makes it easier to keep going; it's a choice rather than a forced condition. Is anyone else at the point where they're not currently suicidal, but you still want it as an option? Have you stockpiled meds or acquired something "for a rainy day?" I just want to know I'm not alone in this.

 

[Jadeith]

I just want to know I'm not alone in this.

You are not. I want to die. But can't right now because of my duties towards other people i chose to uphold.
Still, i got nice bottle of SN and modified mask with Argon (Nitrogen in future) tank - "just in case". Just need some antiemetics which, in my region, aren't as readily available as SN and i want to obtain Nitrogen instead of Argon - "feels" more natural.

 

[CanIStopTryingNow]

I decided to buy it.

 

[sonofsun]

That is a good coping mechanism as it makes people feel in control of their life and a choice to CTB when situation goes below certain threshold and they can choose that threshold

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm relieved I purchased mine when I did. I do feel pretty certain that I want to CTB but, I've always wanted to wait for my Dad to go first. I'm not hugely impulsive though, so it felt a safe thing for me to do. I have a 'kit' ready now, even though my Meto is well out of date now. It reassures me that I have it prepared. Ideally, I'd like at least one more method as a back up prepared but, I'm struggling to settle on what.

 

[CanIStopTryingNow]

I was contacted by the DMC site through WhatsApp and have paid through AirBnB. I am not sure how long shipping will take.

 

[puppycharge]

I'm tempted to buy SN, not to use immediately, but to have "just in case." I know my family and doctors would think it's a bad idea to have lethal means around incase it leads me to make an impulsive attempt. I am not a very impulsive person, outside of a mixed mania (rare.) I would likely spend significant time deciding to suicide. Sometimes having a way out, makes it easier to keep going; it's a choice rather than a forced condition. Is anyone else at the point where they're not currently suicidal, but you still want it as an option? Have you stockpiled meds or acquired something "for a rainy day?" I just want to know I'm not alone in this.

Yeah I know how you feel. I wish I was able to get access to buy SN so I could feel more content knowing I have that option to use it at any time. So believe me you are not alone in this.