Still "Alive"

[anonymousfoxxo]

Just the usual every few weeks post that I'm still """alive""".
I don't know why I'm here for. I just feel like whatever I do, I'll never be enough, never achieve my dreams, never achieve to get out of this shithole of a fucking county where we can't pay for electricity, water, internet, basic human rights like medical help. I'm just so Fucking tired of it all. Once again going back for 12 hour shifts in a minimal wage facility and I'm just on the verge of giving the fuck up. Why am I doing anything? Whatever I do I'm just tired, and tiresome to others. I hate it here so much.

Fuck...
I... I don't know what else to say.

I hope you all are holding up o.k. and that you all will find the peace you're looking for one way or another.

I'm kept here because I don't want to hurt my mother , little brother, or stepfather , and I know they said they would be hurt if I'm gone. But fuck.. man.. I can't bear with the pain for too long. . .

I started going out again too , hoping it would do shit. Found a cute guy, stuff is going well between us and yet I feel miserable for no Fucking reason. I'm just so afraid of doing another mistake and being stuck forever with the thoughts of missing someone. I miss my ex. Every Fucking day.

I also ran out of money for alcohol, which didn't make shit better either, just kind of postponed the pain for later in one large dose...

I don't know where I'm going

I don't ... Know... Where I'm going....

Where am I going.................

Who am I..?
Why...why am I..?
....

..........


.....


...


(...)

I hope you all are at least doing a bit better than other days.

I hope there's some of you out there who is actually getting better.

Thanks for reading my vent,

 

[Sleeper System]

Your venting is funny because I feel that way a lot.
Working at a crap dead end jobs sucks. I know.
As long as you have SOMETHING to comfort you... I think you'll be ok.

 

[donsie]

thanks for writing your vent. I hope your day gets better. I can't think of anything else to say

thanks for writing your vent. I hope your day gets better. I can't think of anything else to say

like I relate to your post and envy you can get your thoughts organized to make them make sense like that. Ok sorry bye

 

[Abyssal]

"Alive"

Yes that is a good way of putting it. I too am "alive"

 

[anonymousfoxxo]

thanks for writing your vent. I hope your day gets better. I can't think of anything else to say

like I relate to your post and envy you can get your thoughts organized to make them make sense like that. Ok sorry bye

Wishing you the best with your own thoughts.

"Alive"

Yes that is a good way of putting it. I too am "alive"

Wishing you the best from here.

Your venting is funny because I feel that way a lot.
Working at a crap dead end jobs sucks. I know.
As long as you have SOMETHING to comfort you... I think you'll be ok.

Thanks for trying to motivate me a little. And hope you get better too soon from these thoughts.

 

[Labyrinth]

You are different, but identical to me. I know how difficult it is to feel the absence, especially of caress and parsimony.

"I just feel like whatever I do, I'll never be enough, never achieve my dreams."
"being stuck forever with the thoughts of missing someone."

His words sounded like whispers that also echo in my mind.

"I feel miserable for no fucking reason."
Perhaps the relationship has not yet fully embraced the two conscious individualities.

Who am I..?
Why... why am I...?

These questions are huge challenges every time I leave home to face the world. As if Existence itself addressed me questions that only I can hear.

 

[sanction]

Just the usual every few weeks post that I'm still """alive""".
I don't know why I'm here for. I just feel like whatever I do, I'll never be enough, never achieve my dreams, never achieve to get out of this shithole of a fucking county where we can't pay for electricity, water, internet, basic human rights like medical help. I'm just so Fucking tired of it all. Once again going back for 12 hour shifts in a minimal wage facility and I'm just on the verge of giving the fuck up. Why am I doing anything? Whatever I do I'm just tired, and tiresome to others. I hate it here so much.

Fuck...
I... I don't know what else to say.

I hope you all are holding up o.k. and that you all will find the peace you're looking for one way or another.

I'm kept here because I don't want to hurt my mother , little brother, or stepfather , and I know they said they would be hurt if I'm gone. But fuck.. man.. I can't bear with the pain for too long. . .

I started going out again too , hoping it would do shit. Found a cute guy, stuff is going well between us and yet I feel miserable for no Fucking reason. I'm just so afraid of doing another mistake and being stuck forever with the thoughts of missing someone. I miss my ex. Every Fucking day.

I also ran out of money for alcohol, which didn't make shit better either, just kind of postponed the pain for later in one large dose...

I don't know where I'm going

I don't ... Know... Where I'm going....

Where am I going.................

Who am I..?
Why...why am I..?
....

..........


.....


...


(...)

I hope you all are at least doing a bit better than other days.

I hope there's some of you out there who is actually getting better.

Thanks for reading my vent,

Just a friendly reminder to make sure don't accidentally have kids with this new guy. Avoid this "accident" at all cost. The absolute last thing you want now is to bring an extra human into this world. All the best to you