Sorting thoughts

[BasqueClown]

I admit it I can be a little chaotic and disorganized
But I can focus in a task and finish it, specially at work, but when my job hours finished I have troubles to get order in my head and feel a rush, like talking with myself
I mean I have a lot of inconclusive projects such books, learn to draw and learn to programming, but my personal and emotional problems make me not taking care about my feelings
I tried to look at books of habits and stop procrastinating (like Getting things done) but I didn't finish yet that, I merely sort my financial expenses and bills but I don't sort my head yet
What's exactly happening?
I had a "cemetery" of projects: from establish a cyberpunk fanzine, my language courses (like japanese, I print out hiragana and katakana templates and didn't finish) as well with Chinese;
My engagement with my ex (I broke up with her because pandemic and she abused me during the peak period, since she harsh to me because she paid rent and food and I only do domestic chores,), or my books of lesbique romantic cyberpunk novels
I fucking procrastinate a lot and writing is my only way to think better, I have speech issues
Seriously, sometimes I don't trust my mind and I feel that a force or imaginary friend is taking control

How the hell do you put order in your brain and consequently have less death thoughts?

 

[JustAFriendlyGuy]

You could try doing something, that calms your mind down a little, in order to not be overwhelmed by your thoughts and to have more control over them.

For me it's music, it always puts me in a different mood altogether.
Alternatively you could try to meditate, it really does wonders to the mind. You are much calmer, your thought process is clearer and there are bunch of physical benefits as well.

 

[Well-Edited Chaos]

How the hell do you put order in your brain

I think you answered your own question - "writing is my only way to think better."

I'm the same way - a lot of noise and ideas and to-do lists pinging around my head and I can only figure out what's a priority when I write it down and get it out of my head.

I used to think that I wrote things down so that I didn't forget them, but I had (basically) the very same list written down 5 other places, so I wasn't going to forget them! Now I know that I write things down just to get them out of my head (I can throw the list in the garbage right away) so I can think.

 

[timf]

You might construct progressive experiments in making order. For example, you might try a jigsaw puzzle of 250 pieces. When you complete that you might try one of 500 pieces. This might aid in establishing a frame of reference of taking control and making order.