Some ideas for my ctb plan

[wishicouldctb]

I have been thinking about where I could ctb so I won't get interrupted or anything during and I have been thinking I may go to this woody park area and drive in to this area you can't see on the walking path. The man I love and I used to have sex there and we never got caught so I'm assuming I won't get caught while trying to ctb. My only issue is the issue of my family. I don't want them to be looking and looking and unable to find me and have the hope that I'm going to be found alive and I'm just missing. I don't know if this is a stupid idea but I was thinking about texting them before my attempt and saying bye I love you and don't blame yourselves for this. And then turning my phone off so they can't try to track it (I'm on the family plan) the area I'm going to is 40 some minutes away from where we live and I've never told them about it so I was thinking if I told them before I left for the site and then went to ctb they wouldn't have any idea where I went so they couldn't try to stop me or have the cops or whoever our looking for me. They wouldn't think I'd be 40 minutes away in the first place. But idk maybe it's a bad idea. It's just like I said I really don't want them to be looking for me believing they might see me alive again. I want them to start grieving as soon as possible so they can move on. My method will be the charcoal method so I'm thinking of downloading so Netflix episodes of whatever to watch until I go. Or maybe just taking some sleeping pills and going to sleep while I wait. My little sister and brother are a lot younger than me so I would like some ideas of special things I can do with them before I ctb so they have some happy memories of me and I can say goodbye. If anyone has any ideas of fun stuff to do before I ctb or important things I should get together before I do please let me know. I still don't have a date set but it'll probably be at least a few months away. I'm trying to set a little money aside.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Utilize a service, email or text, that can send "delayed" messages for anytime you set it to send, for example 1 day after you anticipate your ctb to be complete.

 

[hollywhite13]

I have been thinking about where I could ctb so I won't get interrupted or anything during and I have been thinking I may go to this woody park area and drive in to this area you can't see on the walking path. The man I love and I used to have sex there and we never got caught so I'm assuming I won't get caught while trying to ctb. My only issue is the issue of my family. I don't want them to be looking and looking and unable to find me and have the hope that I'm going to be found alive and I'm just missing. I don't know if this is a stupid idea but I was thinking about texting them before my attempt and saying bye I love you and don't blame yourselves for this. And then turning my phone off so they can't try to track it (I'm on the family plan) the area I'm going to is 40 some minutes away from where we live and I've never told them about it so I was thinking if I told them before I left for the site and then went to ctb they wouldn't have any idea where I went so they couldn't try to stop me or have the cops or whoever our looking for me. They wouldn't think I'd be 40 minutes away in the first place. But idk maybe it's a bad idea. It's just like I said I really don't want them to be looking for me believing they might see me alive again. I want them to start grieving as soon as possible so they can move on. My method will be the charcoal method so I'm thinking of downloading so Netflix episodes of whatever to watch until I go. Or maybe just taking some sleeping pills and going to sleep while I wait. My little sister and brother are a lot younger than me so I would like some ideas of special things I can do with them before I ctb so they have some happy memories of me and I can say goodbye. If anyone has any ideas of fun stuff to do before I ctb or important things I should get together before I do please let me know. I still don't have a date set but it'll probably be at least a few months away. I'm trying to set a little money aside.

Can I ask why you want to kill yourself? I'm not being patronizing or anything - I understand how bad depression can be at that age so honestly you can hit me with anything. Just thinking of your little brother and sister and how much they love you. Please try everything before you do this. Message me if you want. I'd being your age and know how bad depression plus ocd is so I'm not easily shocked.