Venting Social phobia is making my life a living hell

[JayBot2005]

My social phobia is becoming extreme.

I got through university by taking benzos and drinking before class and now that I'm expected to enter the workforce I realize I can't keep the charade up anymore. I can't even meet friends when sober let alone socialize in general.

After a recent hospitalization because of bipolar depression I'm now living with my mother. I am so grateful that she supports me through thick and thin but now I'm just imagining a future of being dependent on her, cooped up in this apartment forever. I know from the bottom of my heart that seeing a psychologist won't cure my social phobia, it's simply too severe.

I see two possible options now: either I CTB or become a monk and lead a secluded life. I've ordered SN so I guess I'm leaning towards CTB.

Anyone else suffering from extreme social phobia?

 

[I screwed up]

Sorry to hear ur situation bro ... Wish I could help... I also suffer from social anxiety with no hope of cure

 

[Blueman]

My social phobia is becoming extreme.

I got through university by taking benzos and drinking before class and now that I'm expected to enter the workforce I realize I can't keep the charade up anymore. I can't even meet friends when sober let alone socialize in general.

After a recent hospitalization because of bipolar depression I'm now living with my mother. I am so grateful that she supports me through thick and thin but now I'm just imagining a future of being dependent on her, cooped up in this apartment forever. I know from the bottom of my heart that seeing a psychologist won't cure my social phobia, it's simply too severe.

I see two possible options now: either I CTB or become a monk and lead a secluded life. I've ordered SN so I guess I'm leaning towards CTB.

Anyone else suffering from extreme social phobia?

I am and I'm 55 and have never experienced it before.
It's been caused by being unemployed due to a stupid decision I made last year.
Try becoming a monk and leading a secluded life if that appeals before Ctb

 

[death137]

Yes I'm suffering from it (main reason to ctb). I'm sorry you are also suffering from it.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

Yeah. Like you I used alcohol to get through a few semesters of college before I broke down and dropped out. It kicked off my entire addiction, which persists to this day. First I used it to be able to talk to people at parties and it spiraled out from there.

If you can do the secluded life without going insane and you have the resources it's a viable lifestyle, you don't have to pick between doing it their way and dying necessarily. I mean it's what I do, I'm basically shut up in my house 24/7 without a single friend and I'd be lying if I said this wasn't easier and more comfortable than living out there. It does get a bit lonely but I'm not exactly a monk lol.

 

[It'sMyLife]

My former brother in law's sister did exactly that - she became a monk - not the catholic type but buddhist I believe . She had suffered some childhood traumas , primarily of sexual nature IIRC. This is most likely what caused her to live an alternative lifestyle through her early adult years which were chaotic . She is very intelligent and could study and tear through any college curriculum and got a doctorate at a very prestigious medical university on the east coast and then went in to research. She should be somewhere wearing a white lab coat every day but she isn't . I don't know what monastery type place she lives but that's where she is . My understanding is that she is very happy and serene in her life and has no regrets . I do not believe that she would be the type to resort to this life as a "last resort" though. It's a commitment as it should be - you have to 'walk the walk' as they say. I doubt I could ever live up to the standard myself. My mind is too fuzzy and indecisive to make an earnest run at it . I say look in to it for sure before you ctb . Many people throw themselves headlong in to a totally different reality and never look back. There are probably so many different types of monasteries that you would have to research it and then study on it first. Do you have a particular faith in mind or were you raised in some particular denonimation? I'm looking at a trappist site right now which is catholic. They have guidelines for sure none of which I meet as I'm already too old and am not catholic. I hope some of this helps you.
I have some kind of weird social phobia. I'm able to leave my house and deal with people but only on a limited basis. I always have to remind myself to just not talk to anyone when I leave the house. Nothing really ever comes out of any contact I do have it seems and I'm certainly not looking for a partner . The right fit for me would probably be someone on this forum lol! I'm 55 and never got married or had kids. I'm still very isolated and feel that when I do put myself more out there that I end up embarrassing myself . I drove yesterday over an hour to have lunch with a friend and she ended up getting annoyed with me. I won't be going back either. I didn't say anything at all to her about this and won't . What keeps me going is just going through the routines every day but worrying about money and feeling that I have such an empty wasted life is wearing me down and I've come full circle back to planning my own exit again . Once I sell this house and get away from what relations I have I'll be in a better place to do so. I don't want any of them knowing what happened to me .

 

[Dude1983]

Try not to care about anyone, not to need anything from anyone "IF i am alone, good, its the best way". A further simile would be, that u sure dont have anxiexty when u are with a 80 years old woman, because u dont want anything from her, and in the work u are going to work, not to make friends... I know its hard to apply, but if u are in such a bad state, u can try this . I am sorry if i am wrong, but i think it kinda worked for me sometimes...