Uselessatbest
Student
- Oct 9, 2019
- 147
I want to dieeeeeeeeeee so bad. It's so hard. Way easier said then done. Why was I born for? I know my parents resent me for being brought to this earth. I didn't asked to be born. No one did. Everytime someone is in the womb, I feel like they should have a glimpse of their life to show whether it's shitty or not, and choose to go through it like it's a choice in a video game. Like choose start and continue or quit game but instead it's life abort mission! Like sorry mom didn't want to be in this world. Sorry for being a dissapintment. Have to exist cause 2 people had sex in the 90s and out came an ugly person who ends up hating every second of life. Fuckkk man. I wish someone can just quickly stab me to death. All methods are painful. I want to drown but wouldn't even know how to go about. I just want to drown. It may be painful but it's guaranteed Ilif I'm weighed down which not sure how to. Put weights on my legs? Maybe I can wear my sweatpants and put a big rock inside? Idk I'm such an idiot. I'm so fucking retarded and ugly and such a loner. I never had friends growing up and I even have trouble conversing with others. Sometimes I wonder if I'm on the spectrum. I really want to find a partner that's smart and no what they're doing so I don't fail. But it's like the lotto. I wish I was just shot in the head. Idk how people take sn I hate the feeling of nausea. Even when I'm hungober from booze I think to myself man an must be worse. Idk I'm just mindlessly rambling. I just want a way out of this cruel world. Life is a curse and existence is pain.
