TheSoulless

TheSoulless

I'd like to fly but my wings have been so denied
Jan 7, 2020
1,055
I was visiting home since I have a week-long holiday now. I left after a few days since I wanted to be alone at my place. I was really stressed the whole time at home, and today especially. But just now I went outside for a smoke, and I feel quite comfortable for once.

The me from five years ago would have never thought things would turn out like this. I'm not sure what to think of anything.
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
But just now I went outside for a smoke, and I feel quite comfortable for once.


I'm not sure what to think of anything.

Perhaps this is one of those rare moments where it's best to just enjoy your smoke and not think so much about the whys and the hows. Hmm... almost feel like having a smoke as well. I'm too lazy to go out and buy cigarettes though.
 
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TheSoulless

TheSoulless

I'd like to fly but my wings have been so denied
Jan 7, 2020
1,055
Bump.

For the past two weeks I've been smoking 1-2 cigs a day, and I've actually found it helpful.
Perhaps this is one of those rare moments where it's best to just enjoy your smoke and not think so much about the whys and the hows.
This is why I've been smoking. I don't have to think about the whys and hows of life when I do. When that poison enters my brain and lungs, I feel in control, and somewhat at peace. I don't feel any more "hopeful" or "optimistic", but I do feel tranquil.

I would say "don't smoke, it's bad for you, it's just a vice of mine" but actions speak louder than words. I know it's a bad habit, but I'm not planning to live that long anyway.
 
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waived

waived

I am a sunrise
Jan 5, 2019
974
The me from five years ago would have never thought things would turn out like this. I'm not sure what to think of anything.

This is how I've been feeling the last couple years. A world apart and not in bad ways, there is definitely a vibrancy to it. Nicotine physiologically helps brain function so the thinking that comes along with it is real.
 
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MichaelNomad123

MichaelNomad123

Jesus
Oct 15, 2020
433
I've been thinking about getting back on the nicotine train but they're expensive and I quickly descend into 5, 10, 15 and 20 a day
 
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TheSoulless

TheSoulless

I'd like to fly but my wings have been so denied
Jan 7, 2020
1,055
This is how I've been feeling the last couple years. A world apart and not in bad ways, there is definitely a vibrancy to it. Nicotine physiologically helps brain function so the thinking that comes along with it is real.
Yeah. And then people just keep judging smokers, without empathy. There's a reason behind smoking, which I myself didn't understand for a long time.
I've been thinking about getting back on the nicotine train but they're expensive and I quickly descend into 5, 10, 15 and 20 a day
I can definitely see why that happens. I'm not good at taking things in moderation either. "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad" goes my train of thought.
 
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Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
I've been thinking about getting back on the nicotine train but they're expensive and I quickly descend into 5, 10, 15 and 20 a day

I know that if I were to smoke cigarettes I'd be chain-smoking them all day long.
 
mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,404
I know that if I were to smoke cigarettes I'd be chain-smoking them all day long.
I am chain vaping all the time, with cigarettes I at least had some pauses.
 
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Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
What type of device do you use? I have Innokin Endura T18.

Smok Fetch Pro. I especially like it because it doesn't have an integrated battery so I can just buy a new one of those instead of replacing the entire device.
 
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