Venting Severe anhedonia causing suicidal idation

[nolongerhuman]

I'm truly glad that the medicine that I'm on is taking the edge off of my horrible anxiety, but now I have a new problem. I don't feel anything. No good emotions. No bad emotions. Just nothing. I'm not interested in anything. I'm not motivated to do anything. I wake up in the morning and think 'why am I alive?' and I don't have an answer.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I'm truly glad that the medicine that I'm on is taking the edge off of my horrible anxiety, but now I have a new problem. I don't feel anything. No good emotions. No bad emotions. Just nothing. I'm not interested in anything. I'm not motivated to do anything. I wake up in the morning and think 'why am I alive?' and I don't have an answer.

I was on that stuff for 25 years… It's a good temporary fix but harmful long-term. I wish I had used to talk therapy to try to get at the core of why I was depressed in the first place. Never really attacked that head on and my demons caught up with me eventually. I hope you have somebody to talk to.

 

[nolongerhuman]

I was on that stuff for 25 years… It's a good temporary fix but harmful long-term. I wish I had used to talk therapy to try to get at the core of why I was depressed in the first place. Never really attacked that head on and my demons caught up with me eventually. I hope you have somebody to talk to.

I appreciate your experience. I have done about a decade of talk therapy and it's hard when the reasons I have for being pathologically anxious boil down to 'school/employment is extremely stressful for an autistic person' and employment is kind of necessary to have the vast majority of things that make life work living.

 

[Zegers]

Life can be so fucking complicated... I've had depression since 2009 and took antidepressants, then anxiety and took pills for it, then have blood circulation problems and physical discomfort... it's like it all leads to absolute depression.

 

[FuneralCry]

Living seems very pointless to me as well, and I only exist for the sake of existing. In a way I have already died. I'm sorry that you suffer so unbearably, it can be very dreadful living an empty existence. I wish you the best.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm truly glad that the medicine that I'm on is taking the edge off of my horrible anxiety, but now I have a new problem. I don't feel anything. No good emotions. No bad emotions. Just nothing. I'm not interested in anything. I'm not motivated to do anything. I wake up in the morning and think 'why am I alive?' and I don't have an answer.

What really saddens me is I feel like so many of us have to be on these medications to numb our natural reaction to how stressful life is. We just become these zombie robots going about our menial lives making rich people richer.