Venting Settle for Mediocrity and platitudes

[TAW122]

I always hate it when normies (as well as people who are successful) rub it in my face to "settle for mediocrity" and/or give shitty platitudes as a way to keep me down whenever I attempt to strive for excellence in the activities that I care/passionate about. Personally, I think mediocrity is a shitty place (depending on the situation of course), especially for things that one wishes to excel, are passionate about, or care about. Objectively speaking, yes inferiority is even worse than mediocrity, that is true. However, when one is considering one's passion, pet project, or just something that one cares about excellence in (a particular activity), being mediocre sucks because it just means that one is stuck in limbo, unable to get to the goal or milestone that one desires.

While some may give encouragement to help and/or tips and hints (much appreciated), the sprinkling of platitudes sours the advice. It is like a feint (verbal) jab to stick it to me and I hate it. I hate it because it seems like the sore-winner rubbing it in to the loser (the person who didn't achieve one's goals). I personally wouldn't want to settle for mediocrity nor would I enjoy having unsolicited platitudes being thrown at me since it doesn't help my situation and rather just reminds me of my shortcomings.

Note: This example is something that I thought about and just fyi, it is not an activity that I have passion about, but I gave this example to prove my point.

For example suppose you have several woodcrafters, A, B, and C respectively. A is inferior at woodcrafting and the special materials (the type of wood, the tools, etc.) used for crafting special woodcraft projects, but A isn't competitive nor serious and as a result, A is the among the worst, even below average. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter for A because A doesn't care. B is the mediocre woodcrafter, and is neither at the top, nor at the bottom. Finally, C is the elite, being one of the pioneers and at the top. C also has access to the best wood, the best tools, and more. With the dwindling of materials and discontinuation of certain materials/products used to produce the same quality of woodcraft that C does, nobody (not even C) could perfect their craft any further. This means that C remains stuck but unchallenged and unrivaled, while A and B also remain stagnant, unable to progress or improve. Then C has the gall to tell A and B to "settle for mediocrity or less". A of course, as mentioned, wouldn't care as A isn't ambitious, but for B, wanting to reach near C, it has become impossible with the current predicament.

If I was A, I personally wouldn't care as it wouldn't matter whether I succeeded or not, however, if I was B, it would be even more reason for me to CTB as that would mean that my goal of reaching near C is no longer attainable. Of course though, I wouldn't just CTB for any one reason (and plus all reasons are secondary to the fact that exercising CTB is one of the ultimate expressions of freedom that one could show). I would rather be dead than inferior or mediocre, but more so if I'm mediocre, especially in an activity that I care about. Again, I'm just using this example to prove my point, and this is not my hobby nor passion!

In short, settling for mediocrity especially for activities or hobbies that one has a lot of passion for is just unacceptable and it's even worse than being inferior because being in the middle (or average, mediocre) is like the universe trolling an individual. Why and what do I mean by this? What I mean is that given someone's passion and pride, by being mediocre means that one falls short of glory, but not far enough to show that one is too far from achieving what one wishes, thus creating a state of limbo. It would be better to be on one end of the spectrum or the other than being stuck. Perhaps others may not see it the same way I do, and I'd like to hear some thoughts on my take for this situation.

 

[CTB Dream]

Vry yndrstnd ablty not have prfct not posbl high this awfl life limit, not posbl high not posbl all, but tell also this lif sll mdcor exmp 1 mil game only able play litl, awfl cncpt lif v mdcor

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's an interesting take and I do relate to it. What I would point out is that the majority of creative people I have worked with- at all levels, struggle. I haven't actually come across that many people in the band 'A' category- that didn't care.

The frustration for me is that you'll never be as good as you want to be. Plus, how you view your own work is sometimes different to the way other people see it. Creativity is very subjective.

I've given so much to my work- it's been an obsession for me but there are still so many things I struggle with. It upsets me of course but in some ways- I have to accept it. There are limited resources and a limited amount of time to do a project in. I always aim to do my best but- in many ways, I often fall short of my own expectations.

I do agree with you in terms of- not many people really understand the creative drive if they don't have it themselves. It's funny though- I haven't heard that phrase- 'settle for mediocrity' that much in terms of creativity- unless it is a hobby- then, people seem to think it shouldn't matter for some reason. When it comes to being creative as a job- most people just seem to think you should quit and get a 'proper' job! I suppose that feels even worse though! As in- you just need to settle for a mediocre life and get a wage slave job like most other people do.

 

[TAW122]

Vry yndrstnd ablty not have prfct not posbl high this awfl life limit, not posbl high not posbl all, but tell also this lif sll mdcor exmp 1 mil game only able play litl, awfl cncpt lif v mdcor

Yeah, life sucks for the average person and it's also mundane too, it's like to me it's either hell and suffering (which is more incentive to CT) or it's living well enough to not actively seeking to CTB (but passively). I see that non-existence is the best. It's the best to never have been (born or conceived).

It's an interesting take and I do relate to it. What I would point out is that the majority of creative people I have worked with- at all levels, struggle. I haven't actually come across that many people in the band 'A' category- that didn't care.

The frustration for me is that you'll never be as good as you want to be. Plus, how you view your own work is sometimes different to the way other people see it. Creativity is very subjective.

I've given so much to my work- it's been an obsession for me but there are still so many things I struggle with. It upsets me of course but in some ways- I have to accept it. There are limited resources and a limited amount of time to do a project in. I always aim to do my best but- in many ways, I often fall short of my own expectations.

I do agree with you in terms of- not many people really understand the creative drive if they don't have it themselves. It's funny though- I haven't heard that phrase- 'settle for mediocrity' that much in terms of creativity- unless it is a hobby- then, people seem to think it shouldn't matter for some reason. When it comes to being creative as a job- most people just seem to think you should quit and get a 'proper' job! I suppose that feels even worse though! As in- you just need to settle for a mediocre life and get a wage slave job like most other people do.

Thanks for your response and yes, I think people from all levels do struggle, good point. Regarding creativity, yes, it is indeed "subjective" and the example I gave is more subjective. However, if I were to use a slightly different example, where the metric is more "objective" then perhaps my point would be more relevant with respect to the thread.

So in a different example, consider athleticism, and personally, I'm not athletic myself, I suck at physical sports and what not, just not really "fit" or anything like that. So hypothetical example when it comes to swimming, there are people who are Olympic level swimmers, then professionals (either coaches or just a pro at swimming in general), and of course, amateur swimmers as well as the ones on the below average (still amateur but novice). The amateur swimmer works hard to be decent, but oftenly ends up in a mediocre situation, where one is good enough to be better than the untrained swimmer or the novices, but not good enough to reach pro level, let alone Olympic level. From my logic, if I was an amateur swimmer who couldn't go pro (not good enough or lack the means to) let alone Olympic level of success, I'd have a strong catalyst towards CTBing. Of course, if I was an inferior novice or amateur, sure that would suck, but at least I wouldn't feel in limbo as I'd just know my place. On the other hand, if I was a Olympic level swimmer, I'd likely enjoy my successes and glory (pride), and while wanting to CTB is always present, it would be more passive than active.

Oh btw the swimming/athletics example was just another hypothetical example to illustrate my point. I'm actually a terrible swimmer, but I just don't care about athletics or sports myself and whether I'm good, mediocre, or terrible at it is irrelevant.

On your final point about settling for mediocre jobs, I'm afraid that's what most people do, and some people may take that day job (mediocrity) but on the side pursue a hobby, passion, or other activity, then if that takes off, then they quit their day job and fully pursue their dreams.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah, life sucks for the average person and it's also mundane too, it's like to me it's either hell and suffering (which is more incentive to CT) or it's living well enough to not actively seeking to CTB (but passively). I see that non-existence is the best. It's the best to never have been (born or conceived).


Thanks for your response and yes, I think people from all levels do struggle, good point. Regarding creativity, yes, it is indeed "subjective" and the example I gave is more subjective. However, if I were to use a slightly different example, where the metric is more "objective" then perhaps my point would be more relevant with respect to the thread.

So in a different example, consider athleticism, and personally, I'm not athletic myself, I suck at physical sports and what not, just not really "fit" or anything like that. So hypothetical example when it comes to swimming, there are people who are Olympic level swimmers, then professionals (either coaches or just a pro at swimming in general), and of course, amateur swimmers as well as the ones on the below average (still amateur but novice). The amateur swimmer works hard to be decent, but oftenly ends up in a mediocre situation, where one is good enough to be better than the untrained swimmer or the novices, but not good enough to reach pro level, let alone Olympic level. From my logic, if I was an amateur swimmer who couldn't go pro (not good enough or lack the means to) let alone Olympic level of success, I'd have a strong catalyst towards CTBing. Of course, if I was an inferior novice or amateur, sure that would suck, but at least I wouldn't feel in limbo as I'd just know my place. On the other hand, if I was a Olympic level swimmer, I'd likely enjoy my successes and glory (pride), and while wanting to CTB is always present, it would be more passive than active.

Oh btw the swimming/athletics example was just another hypothetical example to illustrate my point. I'm actually a terrible swimmer, but I just don't care about athletics or sports myself and whether I'm good, mediocre, or terrible at it is irrelevant.

On your final point about settling for mediocre jobs, I'm afraid that's what most people do, and some people may take that day job (mediocrity) but on the side pursue a hobby, passion, or other activity, then if that takes off, then they quit their day job and fully pursue their dreams.

Yeah, I do take your point. I think it can be a huge source of disappointment when- no matter what you do- you can't achieve your aims. To a large extent- it is what motivates me to want to CTB- so, I can't dismiss it.

SHOULD someone settle for mediocrity? No- just the same as no one SHOULD be expected to take on any life view because they are told to. CAN they though- and still be reasonably happy? Perhaps.

It depends why they are doing said activity. If they are ONLY doing it for awards and to become the best in it- yeah- they're likely to be very disappointed. In fact- it's almost guaranteed. What percentage of the human race make it to olympic level- or- even professional- in their chosen field?

What I would say is- I imagine most people who pursue a goal probably do it because they enjoy the activity. In fact- many will say they love it. That enjoyment MAY become tarnished because they realise that they're never going to be the best. On the other hand- it may spur them on to become better- or, at least- as good as they can become.

If I'm honest- I know I'll never become brilliant in what I do. I may become better in certain areas but there are some I am likely always to struggle in. It upsets me and I feel hugely envious of people who excel. Still- personally- that isn't enough to put me off. Some people don't like my work. Others do- and- enough to pay me to do it. That's good enough for me. So- in some ways- I suppose I'm willing to put up with my own mediocrity.

For me- creativity has been my therapy. I can literally loose myself in it. While I'm obviously striving for a good end result- the process of it is important to me. For me anyway- I suppose the idea of being that competitive would actually take the enjoyment out of it. Obviously, we are all in competition but if I felt like something was only worth doing if I was going to become the best in it- I think I'd be even more suicidal! Because I know my own limitations- I'm never going to become the best.

I can still relate though. I've never been great at sports either- but- I have gone through phases where I've tried to be fitter. I took on one particular exercise every day. I was improving and decided one day to look at how close I was to the world record! Honestly- it was laughable. Naturally- I was WAY off. I did feel an unreasonable amount of disappointment but- I still persisted because- even though I knew I was never going to be that great at it- it made me feel fitter and better.

I guess it depends on your personality and why you are doing said activity. Some people are perfectionists- so, probably nothing will ever be right. Others may be dead set on becoming the best and nothing short of that will do. I guess- either attitudes may look a bit extreme to the normies out there but- I expect it's hard to change it if it's who you are.

I think it's unreasonable to tell someone they HAVE to do anything. I think it's ok to suggest to a person that they may become happier if they look at things a different way but ultimately- it has to be up to them to be open to that. Once again- this sounds very much like the pro-life sentiment of- you HAVE to stay alive- so- whatever's upsetting you- you need to make the adjustment so it doesn't upset you anymore. In this case- accept your own limitations or, those imposed on you and settle for mediocrity.

 

[NumbItAll]

Yes I can relate to this since there are things that I am "good" at to the casual observer, but in reality I am absolutely horrible for the amount of time I've been working at them, to the point where I might as well give up. "Working harder" has a point of diminishing returns when you are capped out by natural ability. This also reminds me of the "lower your standards" mantra when it comes to dating. It makes no sense to me because we don't control who we are attracted to??? At least I don't... why date someone you aren't actually interested in? Plus that other person deserves someone who will really cherish them, instead of just "settling" for them. In any case it basically comes down to people telling you to feel things that you are not capable of feeling, which is baffling.

 

[TAW122]

Yeah, I do take your point. I think it can be a huge source of disappointment when- no matter what you do- you can't achieve your aims. To a large extent- it is what motivates me to want to CTB- so, I can't dismiss it.

SHOULD someone settle for mediocrity? No- just the same as no one SHOULD be expected to take on any life view because they are told to. CAN they though- and still be reasonably happy? Perhaps.

It depends why they are doing said activity. If they are ONLY doing it for awards and to become the best in it- yeah- they're likely to be very disappointed. In fact- it's almost guaranteed. What percentage of the human race make it to olympic level- or- even professional- in their chosen field?

What I would say is- I imagine most people who pursue a goal probably do it because they enjoy the activity. In fact- many will say they love it. That enjoyment MAY become tarnished because they realise that they're never going to be the best. On the other hand- it may spur them on to become better- or, at least- as good as they can become.

If I'm honest- I know I'll never become brilliant in what I do. I may become better in certain areas but there are some I am likely always to struggle in. It upsets me and I feel hugely envious of people who excel. Still- personally- that isn't enough to put me off. Some people don't like my work. Others do- and- enough to pay me to do it. That's good enough for me. So- in some ways- I suppose I'm willing to put up with my own mediocrity.

For me- creativity has been my therapy. I can literally loose myself in it. While I'm obviously striving for a good end result- the process of it is important to me. For me anyway- I suppose the idea of being that competitive would actually take the enjoyment out of it. Obviously, we are all in competition but if I felt like something was only worth doing if I was going to become the best in it- I think I'd be even more suicidal! Because I know my own limitations- I'm never going to become the best.

I can still relate though. I've never been great at sports either- but- I have gone through phases where I've tried to be fitter. I took on one particular exercise every day. I was improving and decided one day to look at how close I was to the world record! Honestly- it was laughable. Naturally- I was WAY off. I did feel an unreasonable amount of disappointment but- I still persisted because- even though I knew I was never going to be that great at it- it made me feel fitter and better.

I guess it depends on your personality and why you are doing said activity. Some people are perfectionists- so, probably nothing will ever be right. Others may be dead set on becoming the best and nothing short of that will do. I guess- either attitudes may look a bit extreme to the normies out there but- I expect it's hard to change it if it's who you are.

I think it's unreasonable to tell someone they HAVE to do anything. I think it's ok to suggest to a person that they may become happier if they look at things a different way but ultimately- it has to be up to them to be open to that. Once again- this sounds very much like the pro-life sentiment of- you HAVE to stay alive- so- whatever's upsetting you- you need to make the adjustment so it doesn't upset you anymore. In this case- accept your own limitations or, those imposed on you and settle for mediocrity.

Excellent points about not settling for mediocrity, and I suppose I am the type to not 'settle' for mediocrity. I wouldn't really say I'm after the best of the best, but I'd definitely like to be in the top part (maybe the 90th-99th percentile, or top 1-10% of the field) of whatever activity that I'm passionate or at least care enough to do well in. If I am mediocre in those activities, to me, I have failed to achieve my aims. Therefore, I do consider myself a perfectionist (when it comes to my passionate activities and various things that I obsess or care about), but not in activities or fields that I have no interest in (I have no interest in sports and don't care whether I'm good, bad, or mediocre in it; I simply just used it as an example to convey my points).

Indeed, it is a shame that pro-lifers oftenly tell people how to live and impose their 'standards' of what is acceptable and what isn't, then enforce those on unwilling participants. In fact, that alone is more than enough to warrant not wanting to be a part of this world and it's bullshit.

Yes I can relate to this since there are things that I am "good" at to the casual observer, but in reality I am absolutely horrible for the amount of time I've been working at them, to the point where I might as well give up. "Working harder" has a point of diminishing returns when you are capped out by natural ability. This also reminds me of the "lower your standards" mantra when it comes to dating. It makes no sense to me because we don't control who we are attracted to??? At least I don't... why date someone you aren't actually interested in? Plus that other person deserves someone who will really cherish them, instead of just "settling" for them. In any case it basically comes down to people telling you to feel things that you are not capable of feeling, which is baffling.

Good point about "diminishing returns" and after a certain level, it does result in less gain per investment. I do suppose that those who want to be the absolute best of the best would justify the steep increase in investment (time, effort, mental fortitude, money, and resources) in to whatever they are hoping to achieve/reach their goal. However, personally, since I'm not aiming to be the best of the best, but among a top percentile, where I would feel content.

Regarding the dating analogy, I personally don't plan on dating and would rather remain single for obvious reasons (including but not limited to personal choice). Though I will address that point in the matter that it makes sense and I agree with you. It wouldn't be fair for the other person to be with someone they don't really like, but would just 'settle' for someone out of obligation or pressure, though I digress..