Sensitive topics

[Life_and_Death]

I want to make an "am I alone in this" type post the problem is I can see some of the responses being a trigger for me.

I was thinking 'requesting' that people put their story under a spoiler.
Why is requesting quoted. Well it wouldn't really be a request. 'you' were warned that what 'youre' saying might be a trigger for me. So it would be kind of insensitive to not hide it.

Basically I can't think of another way to handle it and was wondering if anyone had ideas.

Edit: to clarify the idea of the spoiler is so I can basically mentally prepare myself for it instead of just waltzing right into it.

(I have something else that's sensitive that I "want" to share but..... I'll deal with that another time I think)

 

[fixitinpost]

I'm not sure exactly what sort of triggers you mean, but this sounds like something you should PM a mod about.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm not sure exactly what sort of triggers you mean, but this sounds like something you should PM a mod about.

Well from my end it's a sex thing and sex things trigger me but I can't just ignore things either.

I'm not exactly sure how a mod could help? I figured it would be better to ask the community since their the ones I'm putting the restriction on so basically what would work/what are they comfortable with. A chance for a better understanding of the situation on both ends. Plus there's a lot more people to get ideas from. I did however think and feel that it would be awesome if a mod could throw their own opinions in though.

 

[MYStERY_Man]

You could certainly ask that people respond with spoiler tags, but it's ultimately out of your control.

Would it gather some sympathy if someone didn't honor your request and you lashed out on them? Maybe. But it wouldn't avoid the distress of being triggered in the first place.

What I usually do is: I rant on Reddit, then ignore the replies.

In your case, it seems you want to read the replies. So, maybe, if you believe you can prepare yourself before clicking on the spoiler tag, then you can do the same before opening the thread?

 

[Life_and_Death]

Would it gather some sympathy if someone didn't honor your request and you lashed out on them? Maybe. But it wouldn't avoid the distress of being triggered in the first place.

No, the idea was to report it for being insensitive or something. haven't put this in concrete yet. Part of why I asked if people had ideas

In your case, it seems you want to read the replies. So, maybe, if you believe you can prepare yourself before clicking on the spoiler tag, then you can do the same before opening the thread?

I thought of this. But then I would have to a lot and every time, then probably have it deleted afterwards because all the triggers would be open all the time.

 

[fixitinpost]

Well from my end it's a sex thing and sex things trigger me but I can't just ignore things either.

I'm not exactly sure how a mod could help? I figured it would be better to ask the community since their the ones I'm putting the restriction on so basically what would work/what are they comfortable with. A chance for a better understanding of the situation on both ends. Plus there's a lot more people to get ideas from. I did however think and feel that it would be awesome if a mod could throw their own opinions in though.

I just wasn't sure if what you defined as triggers could actually be a moderation issue or addressed with forum features. Would additional thread prefixes/tags be helpful? Like if there's a prefix for sex, so in case it isn't immediately obvious that the thread contains sex topics, you can still see it next to the thread title and prepare yourself. I could see that being useful the other way around, i.e. for those who are particularly interested in such topics.

As @MYStERY_Man said, I don't think there's much that can be done on a community level. It would have to be enforced by mods, I think. I would like the misogyny that rears its ugly head in such and other threads to stop. That triggers me, but is not within my authority to control.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I just wasn't sure if what you defined as triggers could actually be a moderation issue or addressed with forum features. Would additional thread prefixes/tags be helpful? Like if there's a prefix for sex, so in case it isn't immediately obvious that the thread contains sex topics, you can still see it next to the thread title and prepare yourself. I could see that being useful the other way around, i.e. for those who are particularly interested in such topics.

As @MYStERY_Man said, I don't think there's much that can be done on a community level. It would have to be enforced by mods, I think. I would like the misogyny that rears its ugly head in such and other threads to stop. That triggers me, but is not within my authority to control.

before i respond, correct me if im wrong but it sounds like youre talking about the site in general...

 

[fixitinpost]

before i respond, correct me if im wrong but it sounds like youre talking about the site in general...

yes, I'm talking about all of the forum. Weren't you also, or did I completely misunderstand this thread lol ?

 

[Life_and_Death]

I want to make an "am I alone in this" type post the problem is I can see some of the responses being a trigger for me.

@fixitinpost ^ the first line in the first post of this thread lol its ok. i wouldnt demand everyone to hide everything i just put those on ignore if they bother me too much. im not that big of a dick lol

 

[fixitinpost]

@fixitinpost ^ the first line in the first post of this thread lol its ok. i wouldnt demand everyone to hide everything i just put those on ignore if they bother me too much. im not that big of a dick lol

Welp lol. Tbh I'm still not exactly sure what that is saying, but nevermind. Carry on as you were .

 

[262653]

Well from my end it's a sex thing and sex things trigger me but I can't just ignore things either.

Use the search function to identify "sex" words, and ignore the posts that contain them.

(I feel the opposite. I WANT to get triggered. I want something to bother me. Maybe I should start making threads too? But what's to talk about?)

 

[Life_and_Death]

Use the search function to identify "sex" words, and ignore the posts that contain them.

(I feel the opposite. I WANT to get triggered. I want something to bother me. Maybe I should start making threads too? But what's to talk about?)

thats not what im looking to do though

 

[262653]

thats not what im looking to do though

You could, then, establish your boundaries in the OP, what you welcome and what you don't welcome. Maybe write in a notepad (also a good exercise), and then copy-paste into your thread, adding/subtracting/modifying your borders when the topic at hand demands it.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I was thinking 'requesting' that people put their story under a spoiler.
Why is requesting quoted. Well it wouldn't really be a request. 'you' were warned that what 'youre' saying might be a trigger for me. So it would be kind of insensitive to not hide it.

the idea was to report it for being insensitive or something. haven't put this in concrete yet. Part of why I asked if people had ideas

You could, then, establish your boundaries in the OP, what you welcome and what you don't welcome. Maybe write in a notepad (also a good exercise), and then copy-paste into your thread, adding/subtracting/modifying your borders when the topic at hand demands it.

so do you think my original idea would work?

 

[262653]

so do you think my original idea would work?

I wouldn't know even if I read this entire thread. (I didn't.)

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

If I start doing nofap again this could be helpful.

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

What you could do is say "Sensitive: please put all your responses in a spoiler tag" in the title so everyone who clicks on your post will have been forewarned. You could also label your thread with "help!" to make sure people know it is going to be a sensitive thread and to tread carefully. And then, you can proceed to explain the situation in your post. This is just what I think. I hope it works out for you somehow. It seems like this project would be really beneficial for you.

 

[Life_and_Death]

What you could do is say "Sensitive: please put all your responses in a spoiler tag" in the title so everyone who clicks on your post will have been forewarned. You could also label your thread with "help!" to make sure people know it is going to be a sensitive thread and to tread carefully. And then, you can proceed to explain the situation in your post. This is just what I think. I hope it works out for you somehow. It seems like this project would be really beneficial for you.

This is what I was thinking. Also idk how beneficial it would be but I do feel it will give me a good perspective. What about people that don't listen or just forget? How would you handle that?

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

I would reiterate it at the end of my post. "Please remember to put all your responses in a spoiler tag, this is very important to me. If you do not want to respect this small request, please refrain from responding, thank you." And I guess you could report all the responses that do not respect it but I'm not sure what would happen after that. I would think that SS members are considerate and understanding enough to respect your small request. Especially because you forewarned everyone in the title and also at the end of your post. This is just what I think.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I would think that SS members are considerate and understanding enough to respect your small request. Especially because you forewarned everyone in the title and also at the end of your post. This is just what I think.

Trust issues so I'm cautious of this. Also I've put warning about not being an idiot (basically) before and I've had to have threads locked because of the beyond stupid/trollish responses, so no, I personally do not trust them.

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

I see, if you do not want to go forward with it, you do not have to. Do what's comfortable for you. If you decide to go forward with it, I would just advise to have a prepared mind and heart for all possibilities. But I think, unless they really want to purposely ignore your request, two or more very clear warnings, one in the title especially, should be enough. You could also request that the thread be taken down when/if you feel like it might get out of hand and avoid it until it is removed. The choice is yours. Good luck either way.

This made me think that maybe, in the future, we could have the option in the settings, when we create a thread, that all the responses to said thread be automatically censored when posted. Then each user could just uncensor the responses they want to see and censor them back when they're done. Many could benefit from that.

 

[Life_and_Death]

This made me think that maybe, in the future, we could have the option in the settings, when we create a thread, that all the responses to said thread be automatically censored when posted. Then each user could just uncensor the responses they want to see and censor them back when they're done. Many could benefit from that.

You should add that to the suggestions ;P

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

I'm too shy ._.

Spoiler: .

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm too shy ._.

Spoiler: .

I understand that . Would you like me to put it there for you with a ( credit goes to...)?

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

You can have it, I give it to you for free, you don't need to credit me. If it makes you feel bad, you can say it was inspired by a member.