nevergoodenough91
Really trying to discover what is going on
- Jun 20, 2023
- 79
I thought I had bpd or something more complex, maybe I do but I was never taught this as a kid or allowed to have it. I discovered it recently so I want to share how it works and bring awareness to its existence.
If you were bullied at a young age and raised by your parents to be a pushover, or they bullied you out of letting you have your own boundaries, thoughts, emotions, and opinions so you became a people pleaser then you dont know how to defend yourself.
What ive learned and what im using to solve this problem:
Self defense is permissionless. I am not fundamentally "lesser than" other people. If people say controlling, boundary breaking, emotionally attacking, or anything that falls under the umbrella of something harmful, it means nothing about me. People are not supposed to be impressed and made to feel good when I interact with them. If they have a negative reaction to me in any way that has nothing to do with me, they just didnt like me.
I AM COMPLETLEY FINE AS I AM, NOTHING NEEDS TO CHANGE.
Nothing needs to change about you no "social skills" no nothing. As you are is completley fine and how you interact is fine. How you express yourself, your opinions, your emotions and thoughts are fine as they are.
The best phrase I heard recently makes everything with this a lot easier to understand "no one can save you". Care for yourself! Defend yourself! Not to validate yourself to others that theyre judgements are wrong, but to keep yourself alive! You must be the one to care for yourself as an autonomous being, you are completley in charge and able to do anything independently. You dont need to fear anyone or thier judgement of how theyll think of how youll express yourself or your views. You depend on no one, you are free of needing to fawn to other people to not be attacked or hurt. Go forward and not care!
If this speaks to you I hope it helps you
If you were bullied at a young age and raised by your parents to be a pushover, or they bullied you out of letting you have your own boundaries, thoughts, emotions, and opinions so you became a people pleaser then you dont know how to defend yourself.
What ive learned and what im using to solve this problem:
Self defense is permissionless. I am not fundamentally "lesser than" other people. If people say controlling, boundary breaking, emotionally attacking, or anything that falls under the umbrella of something harmful, it means nothing about me. People are not supposed to be impressed and made to feel good when I interact with them. If they have a negative reaction to me in any way that has nothing to do with me, they just didnt like me.
I AM COMPLETLEY FINE AS I AM, NOTHING NEEDS TO CHANGE.
Nothing needs to change about you no "social skills" no nothing. As you are is completley fine and how you interact is fine. How you express yourself, your opinions, your emotions and thoughts are fine as they are.
The best phrase I heard recently makes everything with this a lot easier to understand "no one can save you". Care for yourself! Defend yourself! Not to validate yourself to others that theyre judgements are wrong, but to keep yourself alive! You must be the one to care for yourself as an autonomous being, you are completley in charge and able to do anything independently. You dont need to fear anyone or thier judgement of how theyll think of how youll express yourself or your views. You depend on no one, you are free of needing to fawn to other people to not be attacked or hurt. Go forward and not care!
If this speaks to you I hope it helps you
