SuicideBoys93
I am the lord of loneliness.
- Feb 10, 2020
- 324
Coming up on the second month of me leaving my wife after finding out I was cheated on. Things are up and down. I don't miss her now but her actions have left me stuck. I relive the same boring routine everyday.. Gym. Schoolwork. Sleep. I did have someone show up in my life but this is where my ex-wife has left her lasting impression on me... Believe me this girl her showed up is ridiculously naturally beautiful. She's one of those where you're stuck looking at her in awe. I'm hesitant to pursue her because I'm worried that my past and mental baggage would eventually ruin anything potentially good. Also, I was in a relationship for six years so I'm trying to remember exactly how to approach women once again. Weird how you tend to forget things like that when you believe you have found the one. I'm not really social and don't have friends. That's mainly my fault because of the previous work I use to do had me bouncing around all over the United States. The friends I did have all gotten married and started families. I don't want to feel like I'm intruding. I typically walk around with headphones in if I'm in public to avoid the possibility of someone talking to me. I'm struggling to find any sort of purpose. Like I said I'm in school full time and I'm doing well somehow, but I feel I have zero sense of purpose. I don't think I could kill myself because of my mom, but I'm not against an unfortunate accident happening to me. I just wanted to get this off my chest. Just some of the thoughts swirling around my head today. I genuinely hope everyone is having a good day.