I don't have a clue what to do. Things are happening and I've got about 10 days, maybe less but don't have my method sorted. In a major panic now.
marcusuk63
CTB
- Mar 24, 2019
- 1,735
Brink
Exhausted. RadHomo.
- Feb 11, 2020
- 625
Sorry to hear you're in a panic. Do you want to talk about it? If so, what has you in such a panic?
It's a long and complicated story and not being rude or anything but talking about it as such doesn't help. I've just been given a date of 17th march which will drastically change things and if I don't ctb by then it can only get worse but I have no method as the pills I have I've been told are unreliable so I'm scared to take them, and I'm uk so cant get sn so now I'm feeling trapped
Brink
Exhausted. RadHomo.
- Feb 11, 2020
- 625
I get that. No worries at all. I wouldn't take any pills that might not work - you could end up in a situation where you'll never get the option to transition again. There are plenty of other options though and I hope you find peace with whatever you decide to do. I'm new here too and always feel free to PM. x
It might not help you but it would help us have a better understanding and give you whatever help you need.
It sounds like you're rushing into this and acting impulsively, which I say over and over again is a terrible idea. We have resource section designed to give some education to different methods. If none of them appeal to you it's likly CTB isn't the answer you're looking for.
People can't and won't tell you how to kill yourself. What we can do is offer you a support network! What everyone will tell you though is that it's nothing something to rush. Each method should be considered carefully and researched properly.
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I have spoken to some members in pm and they know the story. This isnt impulsive, I've been planning it for a while but the pills I have there is limited information on. I'm in a hotel, having come here to ctb and I was confident in my method but one of the members talked it through with me and said about my pills. There is a chance they may work in a few hours during which time I could be unconscious but there is also a chance they may take a few days and I might regain consciousness. so I delayed to look at sn but having hard time getting hold of it
That's all well and good, but we can't offer you anymore advice without more details. I'm not trying to be invasive nor mean but we aren't mind readers.
For example what are the pills? Some people may have knowledge of combinations with other medications that make it lethal.
If you're only happy pming members your story that's your choice, but it limits the help we can give in a public post to anymore that "we have a resources thread" or "we are here for a chat".
My story is that my daughter is making false allegations against me - she has a psychological condition which is not being addressed. It has caused me to be totally isolated and lose my family and business etc as well as a lot of trouble with police. I am not in trouble with police as I have done nothing wrong but it is an ordeal to keep going through everyday when I have no support network. It is the stuff my daughter has done which has caused depression anxiety ptsd etc but the courts cant do anything as she is an adult and its up to her to seek help/support etc. Meanwhile I am estranged from her and my other daughter cos of it all. 18months down the line, it still goes on, it gets worse everyday and is set to go on for a lot longer until my daughter decides she no longer wants to be with the bloke she is with and wants to come home again. Could be years.
Pills - I have a large volume of amlodopine, calcium channel blockers which i thought would drop my blood pressure low enough to stop my heart, and they may well do but Quarky looked into them on here for me and there is just not a lot of research material availiable.
Pills - I have a large volume of amlodopine, calcium channel blockers which i thought would drop my blood pressure low enough to stop my heart, and they may well do but Quarky looked into them on here for me and there is just not a lot of research material availiable.
I take it 17 March is your next court date? Is the rush to prevent not beating the charge like Rocky?
@Lostnotfound
Well maybe suicide isnt the answer as it doesnt seem like the "stars are aligning"?? Maybe you should face the situation and see what happens.
In the end if you cant get your materials for CTB it doesn't sound as if suicide is going to happen for you at this moment. Maybe you should refocus your energy on things you could do to help your impending court date.
So what is the exact problem you need to fix that members can provide opinions on?
Either way there's not much anyone can do here but listen and offer suggestions. At the end of the day you will still have to make your own decisions.
Wishing you all the best...❤❤❤
EDIT: Sounds like you could use legal aide.
Well maybe suicide isnt the answer as it doesnt seem like the "stars are aligning"?? Maybe you should face the situation and see what happens.
In the end if you cant get your materials for CTB it doesn't sound as if suicide is going to happen for you at this moment. Maybe you should refocus your energy on things you could do to help your impending court date.
So what is the exact problem you need to fix that members can provide opinions on?
Either way there's not much anyone can do here but listen and offer suggestions. At the end of the day you will still have to make your own decisions.
Wishing you all the best...❤❤❤
EDIT: Sounds like you could use legal aide.
I'm sorry. My godfather ctb did the same thing except before his court date. It was on child support tho he could not pay and had warrants against him.
Quarky00
Enlightened
- Dec 17, 2019
- 1,956
@Onlyborrowedtime , OP detailed in previous threads. @Lostnotfound , I hope you don't mind me adding that , just trying to release some pressure and help others understand better 
So yeah , this is not impulsive , and rather horrendous complex painful situation.
I'm so sorry that I can't help you with that situation I wish I could
So yeah , this is not impulsive , and rather horrendous complex painful situation.
I'm so sorry that I can't help you with that situation
I wish I could You can get amitryptiline online in UK if you have Benzos and anti-emetic.
You can also get chloroquine. I don't know the recipe, but fatal in overdose
It seems that all of these "solutions" wont work because OP repeatedly states she cannot get packages. OP also indicated reshippers cant help so none of these are suggestions.
Frankly, I don't see any suggestions helping short of one that could get some one convicted of a crime...
Of course if my brainstorming appears to be limited, I welcome the challenge. I'm not perfect....
EDIT: Adding this post as a caution.
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...ing-just-dont-take-the-bait.33723/post-626135
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OP, maybe skip over reading this post. This particular impotence is the most vigorous defense imaginable of following through with boarding the bus, once you've decided to do so.
No, they have decided I have to do a probation report and are making me go 'home' but thats where the issues are.
Thanks a for your input but actually I have followed suggestions and found an address to get the packages delivered to at a cost which i have paid, and i have noted that a seller has sn available to be shipped in which i have ordered but it is unlikely to arrive in time. I thought this was a friendly group to try to support each other and talk about things that were troubling you?
Thankyou. I dont expect any help and I know that if and when I ctb if anyone had been seen to be helping me they could be in trouble as could this forum so I didn't ask for help. The courts have decided that in order to see whose wrong they want me to see a probation service on the 17th which means i have to go home and thats what I cant face, but also that could land my daughter in more trouble but if I dont go then I am in trouble. Its not a court date although everyone has jumped on it saying it is. How do you face a day knowing at the end of it either you or your daughter could be looking at serious charges .... and its an either/or situation. We cant both walk away from this due to her past and her previous actions - which prove my innocence. Its complicated but thats about the best way I can describe it. Whatever happens I have no family to turn to at the end of it and thats probably the worst thing. I still have all the amlodopine and ramipril but its so dodgy as we discussed. I found a mailbox and sn but just not enough time now. Hence in a bad state of mind.@Onlyborrowedtime , OP detailed in previous threads. @Lostnotfound , I hope you don't mind me adding that , just trying to release some pressure and help others understand better
So yeah , this is not impulsive , and rather horrendous complex painful situation.
I'm so sorry that I can't help you with that situation
Thanks for you support though, I do appreciate having a few people on here to talk to.
Its not a court date but thankyou for your support
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Quarky00
Enlightened
- Dec 17, 2019
- 1,956
This is a real torture . Either you go in prison and your daughter is free; or your daughter goes in prison and you're free
If the probation starts on the 17th you still have time / address to order things . You said you go home , can't you order things to that place ?
If the probation starts on the 17th you still have time / address to order things . You said you go home , can't you order things to that place ?
A very kind member pm'd me re sn and a possible supply which I have acted on and can hopefully pick up (being delivered to a store so I can't be traced) on Monday. To that person I am so grateful! So I've a package coming from overseas to a mailbox service around 16th and then this on Monday. I don't want to do this but can't see another way out so I am resigned. Waste of everything we worked for but this is the chosen path. Thankyou for caring xxThis is a real torture . Either you go in prison and your daughter is free; or your daughter goes in prison and you're free
If the probation starts on the 17th you still have time / address to order things . You said you go home , can't you order things to that place ?
Quarky00
Enlightened
- Dec 17, 2019
- 1,956
I hate to see this happening to you. Someone's life completely ruined in such a short period.
I understand there are dozen of real traumatic events and one big mess. But I would like to believe that despite being broken and shattered and harassed and thrown to the dogs (and to jail if I recall), you can somehow run away from all of this, yes leaving everything behind, and start new elsewhere, somehow (I understand you've been 'haunted' through several counties). But it's I guess it's a fantasy my behalf
Glad you managed to solve this , at least . Hope from now until then you would feel the power is in your hands
I understand there are dozen of real traumatic events and one big mess. But I would like to believe that despite being broken and shattered and harassed and thrown to the dogs (and to jail if I recall), you can somehow run away from all of this, yes leaving everything behind, and start new elsewhere, somehow (I understand you've been 'haunted' through several counties). But it's I guess it's a fantasy my behalf
Glad you managed to solve this , at least . Hope from now until then you would feel the power is in your hands
I am at an unknown location under a false name paying cash .... right beside the beach. It's the only thing I can take solace in. I've read your thread on your situation and wish I could help. Different countries and all that though. I would give you a home xxx you're wonderful so Thankyou for that xxxI hate to see this happening to you. Someone's life completely ruined in such a short period.
I understand there are dozen of real traumatic events and one big mess. But I would like to believe that despite being broken and shattered and harassed and thrown to the dogs (and to jail if I recall), you can somehow run away from all of this, yes leaving everything behind, and start new elsewhere, somehow (I understand you've been 'haunted' through several counties). But it's I guess it's a fantasy my behalf
Glad you managed to solve this , at least . Hope from now until then you would feel the power is in your hands
