Rejected by psychiatry

[ExitTheMatrix]

I made a phone call at the local psychiatry. I am severly depressed and anxious and on the verge to ctb.

I denied being suicidal and having plans cause I don't want to be forcefully commited.

They called me one hour later telling me they reject my application.

I have alot of mixed feelings. Anger, sadness, hopelessness and dissapointment for being rejected. But also relief that I can go about my suicide plans and they don't even know or care.

So much for calling in at the psychward...Unless you openly tell them you want ctb you wont get any help.

I do want help but at the same time I don't. There is alot of confusing mixed feelings, clogging my mind, making me overthinking, mainly the fact that I was rejected.

Anyone else experienced something similair?

 

[blahblahhh]

I understand the feeling of wanting help vs. not wanting help—I've been there for a long time. Like you mentioned, not getting help would just make ctb a closer reality. I called a virtual psychiatry and they said I was "way beyond their capabilities." I have another appointment tomorrow and I almost wanna cancel so I'll have an excuse to finally ctb.

 

[Spiral]

I made a phone call at the local psychiatry. I am severly depressed and anxious and on the verge to ctb.

I denied being suicidal and having plans cause I don't want to be forcefully commited.

They called me one hour later telling me they reject my application.

I have alot of mixed feelings. Anger, sadness, hopelessness and dissapointment for being rejected. But also relief that I can go about my suicide plans and they don't even know or care.

So much for calling in at the psychward...Unless you openly tell them you want ctb you wont get any help.

I do want help but at the same time I don't. There is alot of confusing mixed feelings, clogging my mind, making me overthinking, mainly the fact that I was rejected.

Anyone else experienced something similair?

I was also rejected and i did tell them i was going to ctb but not immediately (that was 3 months ago) I think they only help you if you have already ctb and you didnt die. I dont actually want help either, i want to ctb, but sometimes i have weird days where my psychosis makes me forget that i cant live. Like, ill start thinking of books i would like to read or places i would like to visit and in a moment of confusion i will think that i can live but i always remember after a day that i cant support myself to live and i cant read books anymore because my brain wont work and i cant visit places because im agoraphobic. So im always coming back to the same answer. Cbt.

I think it is only natural to keep changing your mind, especially if you are suffering depression, its extra difficult to make decisions or to make sense of your feelings. There is no rush, don't pressure yourself and in time you will know which you want :)

 

[ExitTheMatrix]

I understand the feeling of wanting help vs. not wanting help—I've been there for a long time. Like you mentioned, not getting help would just make ctb a closer reality. I called a virtual psychiatry and they said I was "way beyond their capabilities." I have another appointment tomorrow and I almost wanna cancel so I'll have an excuse to finally ctb.

Thank you for your answer. Yes. It seems like in psychiatry they don't know what to do, so they just pass people around really just tricking you into "false progress" while in reality your stuck with the same problems, looping around the institutions. Im also starting to think and feel that ctb is the real solution to this madness. It just so stigmatized not accepted by society because if people in mass start to see through the lies, deception, illusions and dissapointments of this world everyone would ctb with less hesitation.

I was also rejected and i did tell them i was going to ctb but not immediately (that was 3 months ago) I think they only help you if you have already ctb and you didnt die. I dont actually want help either, i want to ctb, but sometimes i have weird days where my psychosis makes me forget that i cant live. Like, ill start thinking of books i would like to read or places i would like to visit and in a moment of confusion i will think that i can live but i always remember after a day that i cant support myself to live and i cant read books anymore because my brain wont work and i cant visit places because im agoraphobic. So im always coming back to the same answer. Cbt.

I think it is only natural to keep changing your mind, especially if you are suffering depression, its extra difficult to make decisions or to make sense of your feelings. There is no rush, don't pressure yourself and in time you will know which you want :) It's very comforting hearing people going through the same confusing thoughts and that there is no pressure to ctb. People on this site are more raw and real than any "qualified psychologist" every is. If only they could be so understanding as people on this site, life would suddenly get better. To hear someone speak from a place of realness and autheticity without the fake bs that you hear from psychiatrists is gold.

I was also rejected and i did tell them i was going to ctb but not immediately (that was 3 months ago) I think they only help you if you have already ctb and you didnt die. I dont actually want help either, i want to ctb, but sometimes i have weird days where my psychosis makes me forget that i cant live. Like, ill start thinking of books i would like to read or places i would like to visit and in a moment of confusion i will think that i can live but i always remember after a day that i cant support myself to live and i cant read books anymore because my brain wont work and i cant visit places because im agoraphobic. So im always coming back to the same answer. Cbt.

I think it is only natural to keep changing your mind, especially if you are suffering depression, its extra difficult to make decisions or to make sense of your feelings. There is no rush, don't pressure yourself and in time you will know which you want :)

It's very comforting hearing people going through the same confusing thoughts and that there is no pressure to ctb. People on this site are more raw and real than any "qualified psychologist" every is. If only they could be so understanding as people on this site, life would suddenly get abit better. To hear someone speak from a place of realness and autheticity without the fake bs that you hear from psychiatrists is really what people need and want all along.


Thank you for your answer.

 

[nurplexkid]

My psychiatrist called me for my 6 months review and didn't bother asking if i was suicidal. I have a history of suicide ideation.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

Strange isn't it, how people tell us to "get help" but the help simply isn't available or doesn't want to take on the liability of a suicidal person's case in fear of the potential besmirching of the practice's reputation.

I have been dismissed by several therapists and psychiatrists because I had, "the worst case of ptsd they'd seen" or they admitted they could not help me and started playing hot potato, shafting me from therapist to therapist until I stopped going because it was a sunk cost that only kept accumulating.

There aren't really many mental health workers who can deal with complex conditions and situations, they are allowed to deny whoever they want, while others scold you for "not getting help" or "trying hard enough"

 

[blahblahhh]

The entire mental health complex is a totally failed enterprise.

 

[Symbiote]

This is what pro-lifers need to see, that even though we try to get help for ourselves, but get denied or rejected because we are fundamentally flawed beings. So where does that leave us? The answer is two-fold. Live and eventually die or CTB. It's selfish to want a person that is in mindless torment to live in pain everyday, while therapists and pro-lifers see themselves as the opposite. Self-less, compassionate, empathy should not be words cognizant to suffering. The word that helps the suffering is mercy. Hospice nurses give mercy to those who are suffering by ending a person's life in a humane way.