Reason to not end your life

[suicidal.lady]

Hi,

Just curious as to what your own reasons are to not kill yourself? Like what are your 'protecting' factors i think they're called idk but just wondering what your own reasons are to not kill yourself

 

[FuneralCry]

I don't really know what a protecting factor is, but the one thing that I know for certain is that the only reason I continue to exist is the lack of reliable method options and fear of a suicide attempt failing. There is no reason to continue existing and risk even worse torture, existence could never be worth enduring and of course I see it as best to avoid delaying the inevitable, but of course it's just not straightforward to be free from existing. It disgusts me how this society is so pro life and how we are denied access to peaceful methods, I could never want to exist in this world no matter what.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's primarily because I'm hanging on for my Dad. I really don't know what's going to happen in the coming months also. My life is about to change drastically- I'm starting a new job and trying to continue at a reduced rate for a company I already work for. I do have a very strong sense of duty. If I commit to doing something, I don't like to let people down. Still- if my mood takes a dive- which is entirely plausible- and when my Dad is no longer here to 'keep me here'- then- who knows? Plus, I can't deny that the actual process of CTB terrifies me.

How about you? 'Protecting factors'- that's an interesting term- I think a fair number of people here have got to the stage where they don't think their life is worth 'protecting'- I suppose that's a thread in itself really- whether people are grateful or frustrated at the things holding them back. How do you feel about it?

 

[lionetta12]

Hi,

Just curious as to what your own reasons are to not kill yourself? Like what are your 'protecting' factors i think they're called idk but just wondering what your own reasons are to not kill yourself

I have no reason to live right now but I'm working on creating reasons to stay alive.

 

[Forest Fire]

Waiting for my elderly mum to pass first. Had a brief wave of optimism recently about trying to recover but now that has gone and i'm finding it harder to stick around for my mum at this moment than at any other point.
I'm scared of the thought of the actions i will need to take to ctb and if i fail i will certainly end up in a much worse physical and mental condition than the one i'm in currently, most likely end up a vegetable, but that is what it is and failure is extremely unlikely anyway.

 

[samishii]

Right now, the only thing keeping me from leaving is the fact that I have my semester exams going on because for some reason, I feel like I can have some amount of dignity before I die if I try for one last time before dying.
Maybe even the thought of my family also keeps me from doing it, knowing it could make there lives hell.

Apart from that, I've got nothing. No hope of my life getting better in any aspect and the constant mental pain and agony only makes it more difficult.

 

[AngryDog]

In my case, suicidal ideation is strong, but temporary. Knowing about what are the physical and psychological causes of that suicidal ideation helped me a lot. I'm still curious about the world and how things work, so a lot of times that curiosity helps me to carry on.

 

[outrider567]

Hi,

Just curious as to what your own reasons are to not kill yourself? Like what are your 'protecting' factors i think they're called idk but just wondering what your own reasons are to not kill yourself

Can't think of any

 

[pharma]

i enjoy the rush of excitement i get when i see cool bugs or plants. i know no one would care if i died, but i have this delusional philosophy that someone has to acknowledge the existence of our natural world, and i want to be one of those people. for now at least. i'd rather return to be one with the earth lol

 

[OutOfTheVoid]

made a commitment to live at least until Easter, which gives me time to complete some projects & art before i go (and to take a tolerance break from drugs so i can maybe use them to OD, even tho i got scared out of that method). also been diving deep into exploring religions, even tho im not part of any organized religion and have no desire to join one, theres just a lot i want to learn while im still here and i want to better understand my own relationship with divinity.

im also just not sure yet what method i'll use to ctb, and i currently lack reliable means. so im stuck here for the meantime

 

[SmallestBigDeal]

Hi,

Just curious as to what your own reasons are to not kill yourself? Like what are your 'protecting' factors i think they're called idk but just wondering what your own reasons are to not kill yourself

My three main reasons to stay alive are my friends, my cat, and my video games

 

[rcs]

I've been oscillating between trying to hang on to hope and just wanting to give up. It's not working out too well though. Anyways, I've been slowly making my way through One Piece, which has been a welcome distraction. (Anybody else watch?)

I also don't know how I would ctb without hurting my boyfriend. His ex ctb a few years ago. After seeing her posts online, he got into contact with her, trying to get her to keep going. He thought he'd been making progress and didn't message her for a day or two. He saw her obituary online a couple of days later.

I have therapy in half an a hour and I'm not sure if I should tell my therapist that my suicidal thoughts have gotten worse.

 

[SilentSadness]

The only reason not to end your life is if you don't want to, it really is that simple. If that was respected then I would be long gone.

 

[TAW122]

Personally, I'm just waiting for the circumstances to align and I also have some things that I wish to fulfill or at least do my best to get them so I would have no regrets at the end. Though if I do fail in my endeavors, then that would just be additional push and drive towards my (inevitable) CTB.

 

[snailboy]

i have several unusual pets that probably wouldn't be taken care of properly if i was gone (two snails, a slug, three millipedes, and a eastern hercules beetle) :)