Deleted member 17949
Visionary
- May 9, 2020
- 2,238
Earlier this year I completely believed that quarantine would make suicide much easier, but in reality it's making everything a lot more difficult. My mum now works from home so where I would usually be able to take advantage of any time I was at home through the day I am now stuck with her questioning where I am going. Since she found my rope she's on high alert and will freak out if I do anything sudden (she basically had a breakdown yesterday when I didn't answer her calls for a few minutes while she went to walk the dog). I've been sent home for this week because of a covid case at our college and it's really just making things more difficult since I can't even leave to try this weekend now.
I know this is relatively short term - I will be able to try to ctb again in under 2 weeks - but it's frustrating and I feel like there's a constant stream of things getting in the way of me attempting lately. I am trying to avoid being impulsive and risking getting myself in trouble but I am getting more desperate to go and it's hard to stay emotionally stable like this.
I know this is relatively short term - I will be able to try to ctb again in under 2 weeks - but it's frustrating and I feel like there's a constant stream of things getting in the way of me attempting lately. I am trying to avoid being impulsive and risking getting myself in trouble but I am getting more desperate to go and it's hard to stay emotionally stable like this.