Quality of Life

[summers]

I didn't want my first post to be a "why am I on SS" thread. That seemed a little pretentious. I hope the posts before this one were helpful, insightful, or supportive.

For a long time (most of my life, really), I wondered why people chose to live into old age. I loved my grandparents and parents, but they had/have basically zero quality of life beyond a certain point. All they had/have was the management of illness, and deteriorating physical and mental capabilities. It's not just them, I see it in everyone beyond a certain age.

I see older people struggling just to walk. See them not as sharp. See them getting sick, getting weak. It makes me laugh when I read comments on other forums that you don't break down with age. How many Olympic gymnasts are in their 30s or 40s? How many MMA fighters are competitive beyond 40? I'm focusing on the physical, but mental deterioration takes place as well. I will 100% give older people credit for life experiences. But try to learn something new and mentally taxing in your 60s...

I really examined myself. At nearly 40, I take a bunch of PEDs to try to feel like I did 10 years ago. My knees and shoulders are fucked. Hearing is pretty bad. Funny that asthetically, I'm probably the best I have ever been. But the amount of work and drugs it takes is a lot, and only getting to be more.

I want to go out standing. Go out being the best I can be. Don't want anyone to ever feel bad for me. Don't want to be slower or weaker than I was yesterday. I'm giving myself about a year to ctb. I plan to push myself physically. I want to meet new people and have new experiences. Have a great year - a year that I will be happy to be the culmination of my life.

I'm so glad I found this community. I don't expect everyone or anyone to understand or agree with my decision, but from what I've already seen, I know I won't be judged.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

Welcome I just wanted to comment on something you mentioned that urged me to prattle on I guess.
We are all different and quality of life is entirely a subjective measurement because the way you perceive reality is all that matters.
This is why I feel people who claim life is bad for everyone else due to an asymmetry of positive and negative experiences during life are missing the point entirely.
It is up to the individual how they feel and not for us to project our versions of reality upon them.
Could you claim awakening others to the rational validity of cosmic pessimism is a morally wrong act? I think you could as it allows the sensation and experience of harm from existing to be realized.
What good is the truth when it diminishes the value of life.

 

[summers]

Welcome I just wanted to comment on something you mentioned that urged me to prattle on I guess.
We are all different and quality of life is entirely a subjective measurement because the way you perceive reality is all that matters.
This is why I feel people who claim life is bad for everyone else due to an asymmetry of positive and negative experiences during life are missing the point entirely.
It is up to the individual how they feel and not for us to project our versions of reality upon them.
Could you claim awakening others to the rational validity of cosmic pessimism is a morally wrong act? I think you could as it allows the sensation and experience of harm from existing to be realized.
What good is the truth when it diminishes the value of life.

Thank you for your comments. What you say is 100% true. Quality of life is exactly that - qualitative. There are plenty of older people who love life, and want to keep living.

I should have been more explicit that my OP about what I perceive as quality of life.

What makes life worth/not worth living for me is not the same as for other people. Similarly, I have read some of the comments on this site and just couldn't understand how a particular situation warrants ctb, but it does for that person. I hope I can further develop my empathy with the time I have left.

 

[luten]

well I was recently told by a surgeon to live according to my functional means. I am pretty screwedup, since early childhood. Now in late 30 and I have not much of a life. I cant work, I cant sit or walk for a long time. I have only 50% rotation in my neck, pain is getting worse. So everyday i am confronted by the fact that my money will run out at some point, and even if i reach my late 40's , i will likely be in a wheelchair, as for spinal-cord damage, which affects my legs. These physical conditions also affects me on a mental level, in a very destructive way. I think a lot of it has to do with living in isolation, not connected to anyone, lack of support. Last friend died in 2018. So we may ask what makes life worth living when you in such a condition, i am trying hard to find reasons...

 

[roguetrader]

I agree with the OP that at some point, Father Time is going to beat you up enough that you're better off dead. That point is subjective and will depend on what a person's expectations is for life quality. For me, it's coming close I think....I'm almost 50.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

You are very astute and observant. We can try to run from old age but will never escape it. Having an already poor quality of health in your youth pretty much seals the deal that old age will be painful. I don't want to reach the twilight years for that reason.