Porn addiction

[jujujr]

Hey, one thing that's always been a struggle of mine since i was very very young was porn, i always knew it was wrong and have always tried to stop it. Ive gotten some mates to recover from their porn addictions too but mine seems to be so bad idk anymore.

Ive had times were i got off it for months then came back to it non stop. i'll be honest, ive used the excuse to watch porn sometimes because of being "masculine" or just full of testosterone and that it might even make my gains better, either cuz im so mad and horny or just angry and depressed at myself for sinking so low

i want to know is there any other people here who suffer the same problem? ive tried using apps and other methods to try and stop but honestly it just isn't working and it's tiring me out

 

[Rhizomorph1]

I can relate to the feeling. I watched porn from the age of probably 14 or so and certainly used it more than I should have.

I've studied my fair share of psychology including human sexuality, sex-focused therapies, and have done a fairly significant deep dive into the research on porn and its outcomes.

The thing about porn is that although our relationship with it can be undesirable, any feelings of shame, guilt, or moral judgments we make about porn are far more harmful than the act of watching porn itself will ever be. Watching porn can develop habitual avoidant behaviors. However, it is by no means bad for you on its own; it is not toxic on the brain and it is morally neutral.

That is to say that it is ok to watch porn. But if you want to change your relationship with it, I encourage you to start by being easy on yourself.

I used to hate that I watched porn daily. I tried so many apps (detoxify, app block, cold turkey blocker on my computer). I felt it had so much control over me and I felt I was wasting my time watching it. I was concerned about what it was doing to my brain and emotional regulation (I now know that the research shows there is no reason to suggest porn use directly causes these issues).

Now that I've accepted myself as someone who enjoys porn, I realize I don't actually really want to stop watching it and it doesn't cause me any problems. You may or may not be different but once you can accept yourself and rule out the possibility that it could be shame that is causing you these issues, from there you can decide if you want to and work on changing your habits. Any competent therapist would suggest the same (I say this from experience).

Accepting myself has also improved my romantic relationships as I know to set a hard boundary early on that I need to be accepted despite watching porn. Most women I've dated are more than okay with this. I also watch porn less now that I'm not using it as a means to cope with the very shame/stress I felt about using it.

Hope this helps <3

Porn, food, drugs, etc. can all be healthy or unhealthy depending on our relationship with it. Thus, they are all morally neutral.

 

[achb]

I don't think I suffer necessarily from porn addiction. But I will say I want to reduce my intake by a lot. Everytime I go down the rabbit hole (which is most days) I find myself starting out with smth innocent enough and ending up needing weirder and weirder shit to get off. It can't be healthy, and after I finish a session I get hit hard with the "wtf am I watching wtf am I doing" overwhelming shame.

I tried to just will power it out with NNN but I failed already . Idk I think I'll be able to sort it out by just trying to avoid porn like the plague as hard as I can. Treat every day like I never failed NNN lol. Try and go cold turkey but not beat myself up if I fail every once in a while.

This probably isn't helpful to you, but I hope you find a way to get past your addiction.

 

[jujujr]

it seems that having consumed it for a very long time, it has messed me up mentally for years, hurt some relationships i had with people and had just brought my mood down a lot. I dont hate people for watching it, i mean it seems like everybody does no matter who they are, but because it's harmed me quite a bit and hearing how bad the industry is, its just shit and i want to never see it again.

 

[Stinger4771]

Porn addiction is something I really struggle with. It's something that people really dont take very seriously enough and that's a shame.

What methods have you tried to quit? I tried over and over for years and never managed more than 5 days. This book was a real god send for me tbh:

https://read.easypeasymethod.org/

It just changes your perspective on porn, without fearmongering or an impossibility of willpower. It genuinely works I felt great immediately after starting this method.

You kinda need to be in the right frame of mind for it to work, but I had a lot of success with it for like 60 days - some bad life stuff happened and I got suicidal and fell back on bad coping mechanisms - but honestly if it weren't for that I might still be free from porn.