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I think it's such a personal thing. Perhaps some reasons we can relate and sympathise to more. I feel huge sympathy towards people in pain. But, I'm not at all keen on the whole 'pain olympics' thing and invalidating people's feelings by saying their reasons 'aren't enough'. That's not to say I think suicide is a decision that should be made flippantly.
To flip it- do some people have more reason to live than others? What 'should' be enough to make someone want to stay alive? Do we all have an obligation to strive for those things? Who to?
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TotalEclipse, getoutgirl, Sannti and 4 others
Better? Like some sort of competition - i got better than yours or something? Or one reason is more valid than other?
Sorry but it seems i failed to understand...
I voted yes for every single option. All of these are valid cus people experience things differently and we were forcefully brought into this world so it's fair if we want to leave at any time. The only reason I can think of that is invalid is if you are a parent in which you are obligated to take care of your child as you choose to have them (with exception of people who had children cus of SA)
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apearl, EvisceratedJester, ForeverCaHa and 1 other person
All of these are valid. I don't think we should really be debating which reasons are "valid" when a core tenet of this forum is that it is up to the person to decide. Sure, some problems cause more or less suffering, but we all experience suffering differently and we all have the right to decide for ourselves our response to that suffering. If ctb is our solution, that is valid.
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Mary Janex, Zyntkalla, Forveleth and 3 others
I don't think these should compete like that, and the term "valid" just sounds wrong to me in this context. Like sure, maybe someone who is suicidal because they had just had their heart broken in a year would have recovered and be glad to be alive, in contrast with someone with chronic pain, a terminal illness or an irreparable financial or legal situation.
You can have that discussion, It is there, and I'm not saying you shouldn't have brought it up, but the best way ideally to conclude is that there are much better more productive discussions to be had. That's just the best answer practically speaking.
Makes way for discussions about how to, regardless of their situation, alleviate or prevent the pain and suffering these people carry around that made them do that. Help fix those systems that perpetuate mental anguish, because it is true that a lot more people would live by doing that, and live happy. Some are preventable, that is worth it. And ranking validity goes opposite to that effort even if just slightly. It just builds into that social stigma. At its best it gatekeeps, at its worst it adds guilt and pain by comparison.
So I don't think it is worth judging who has more right, or even if any of them has a right (controversial, changes may apply), you can and there may be an answer to that, just not one I think would help people at all.
Nah, I get why you'd think that might help but it wouldn't.
There's no universal metric for what counts as a "valid" reason to CTB. What wrecks one person barely touches another. Some people survive homelessness, assault, addiction, decades of pain—and still stay. Others get dumped once and spiral so hard they never recover. It's not about the event. It's about the brain reacting to it.
Trying to rank reasons creates a hierarchy that does nothing but shame the people already closest to the edge. It turns survival into a contest. "You want to die over this? Well, someone else lived through worse." That's not helpful. That's guilt dressed up as logic.
And let's be real—no one CTBs because of one thing. It's always a build-up. Even when it looks like a single trigger, it's a house made of years of rot that finally collapsed. You can't rank that.
If someone's in enough pain to want out, the reason is already big enough for them.
TLDR: There's no such thing as a "valid" or "invalid" reason to want to CTB. Pain isn't a competition. What breaks one person might barely affect another, and it's never just one thing—it's years of buildup. Ranking reasons only adds shame, not clarity. If someone's in enough pain to want to go, that reason is already big enough.
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Lo$t95, Michi_Violeta, getoutgirl and 2 others
What is the point of this poll? All reasons are valid. Shit like this just feeds into the "trauma Olympics" bullshit and leads to others feeling like their reasons for ctbing aren't valid.
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willow_tree, Forveleth, Namelesa and 1 other person
I don't see why voluntary death would even need a reason at all, we are all going to die anyway whether there is a reason behind it or not and death is happening all the time, it's all that's inevitable, it's all that humans are destined for, existing to me is just waiting to die and I see continuing to exist as just prolonging the suffering. I'd personally always prefer to not exist no matter what as I just want peace from this torturous, futile existence I personally always saw as a mistake, the fact that this existence was even imposed is always the most terrible tragedy to me, for me non-existence really is all that's positive, I find it so horrific how a human can exist for so long with no limit as to how much agony they can feel just to be tortured by old age.
Generally you should CTB In order to escape some sort of pain that can't otherwise be fixed, So really any reason to CTB seems like a good reasons to do it, since if you reach the point in which you have come to that sort of a conclusion, you have most likely exhausted every other path in life. Suicide by it's very nature goes against your Biological impulses, and the values that you are raised up to have by society, and so If you have reached the point in which you disregard these, then the struggle needed to reach there, is by itself enough to justify a CTB.
Although I personally think You should have free choice, and that it's your right to do as you please with your life, the right to life seems also to come with a right not to life, in my opinion.
I don't think we can comment on or compare the validity of anyone's reasons. It's more about what's real for each of us as individuals, and that can be anything. It can be all the reasons mentioned, some of them, or none of them. It's different for everyone, even within the categories, and it's not the same due to our individual experiences. There is a different story behind the reason for each of us, making the intensity or perception unique, and the way we choose to respond.
I think some are more "valid" in the sense that they are harder to overcome. Ex. failed relationship: a high school one time date and then the other person says they aren't interested, to me, isn't the same as having a spouse completely destroy a 20 year marriage with kids. I won't say they aren't reasons but one is easier to get past. Losing your first job at 16 vs getting corporate shaft after decades of bs and are now in the job market again at 50 in a dying industry. Everyone can decide if they want to go on or not.
As I said to you the other day in this thread when you asked for a list of "valid reasons":
TLDR: There's no such thing as a "valid" or "invalid" reason to want to CTB. Pain isn't a competition. What breaks one person might barely affect another, and it's never just one thing—it's years of buildup. Ranking reasons only adds shame, not clarity. If someone's in enough pain to want to go, that reason is already big enough.
Who says you need to reach a certain level of pain in others' eyes just to get a pass to kill yourself? Having decided it is already good enough of a reason to. I don't even think the reason itself matters so much as it's going to end up in a suicide anyways regardless what it was for.
Only one I find invalid, and that's only by comparison, is the academic one because academia is fucking worthless and it's perfectly possible to live without it whereas you can't live without certain minimal economic, physical, mental, or emotional conditions.
Grades, titles, papers. Take it from someone with a postgraduate degree: absolutely worthless. I'd trade it all for a loving relationship. You can take away my degrees and I'm still me, but take away my dreams, my friends, my welfare or my health...yeah, that's fucked me up.
Although i voted for one specific term.. and thats a reason that relates to me peraonally... but i dont think there is any specific reason at all... its a personal choice for that persons peraonal reasons ...we shouldnt label any type of reason especially as a rating system ..
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