Venting Pointless rant

[Slimetae]

I feel like if I could ctb painless by sn or by a fire arm I would . Ican't afford either tho it must be nice for people that have a means out within their reach and can go when they want not forced to exist if they don't want to . Can't even find the will to do anything but lay around feel nothing .Might aswell be in jail or a nut house at least I'd be more productive there . Just stuck in my own head 24/7 psychological prison no motivation to do the basics of life. can't go a painful way bc of si so I guess it's just not my time gotta go through more bullshit before I die .

 

[Huntfish34]

I get it, and understand exactly what you mean. The passion and joy I used to have for a couple hobbies are now all gone. Luckily I do have a few guns to off myself, but still can't find the courage or strength to pull the Fckn trigger. Fml.

 

[FuneralCry]

I also envy those who have a way to ctb, it really is so awful feeling as though I am trapped in this world. I just want to peacefully pass away and be free from this horrible life. Everything feels so pointless for me as well. It is all so depressing. I'm sorry that you suffer so unbearably. I wish you the best.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I feel like if I could ctb painless by sn or by a fire arm I would . Ican't afford either tho it must be nice for people that have a means out within their reach and can go when they want not forced to exist if they don't want to . Can't even find the will to do anything but lay around feel nothing .Might aswell be in jail or a nut house at least I'd be more productive there . Just stuck in my own head 24/7 psychological prison no motivation to do the basics of life. can't go a painful way bc of si so I guess it's just not my time gotta go through more bullshit before I die .

Our mind can be really terrible and torturous. I sometimes just wish I didn't think about anything.

 

[Banshee]

I feel like if I could ctb painless by sn or by a fire arm I would . Ican't afford either tho it must be nice for people that have a means out within their reach and can go when they want not forced to exist if they don't want to . Can't even find the will to do anything but lay around feel nothing .Might aswell be in jail or a nut house at least I'd be more productive there . Just stuck in my own head 24/7 psychological prison no motivation to do the basics of life. can't go a painful way bc of si so I guess it's just not my time gotta go through more bullshit before I die .

I don't know if that's actually the case for most people. There is lots of people on here that live in the states and could easily get a firearm, yet they don't because even when you want to die and have the means to do so, it's really hard to go through with it. Myself, I have 8 firearms (3 shotguns, 3 rilfes, a revolver, and a carbine) yet I find it extremely hard to go ahead and do it because of various things like the mess, who will find me like that, will my dumb cat starve to death before being found. Also recently after watching an 8 minute compilation of failed shotgun ctb to the head has made me reconsider taking the blam-o route.