Dear god why is it so hard to fucking die. Oh my god I just want life to end so badly, why isn't there just a button I can press. Every fucking second hurts. Every. Second. Every fucking day it hurts. Every fucking day. Oh my god. Fucking I try to get help but they can only offer therapy over the phone because of this GOD DAMN pandemic that'll probably last fucking forever. It feels like there's no fucking end. Talking over the phone doesn't fucking help. It doesn't help. Nothing helps. Only death will help but it's too hard. Please oh my god please I want life to end so badly why do I have to continue to fucking live I didn't want to be born anyway I'm desperate to die.
BipolarGuy
Enlightened
- Aug 6, 2020
- 1,456
What's making you feel like that?
Yes, you can write a long reply :)
Yes, you can write a long reply :)
Lilacmoon
Beautiful moon, take me away.
- Sep 23, 2020
- 1,308
I'm so sorry that you are going through so much pain. It's really true, isn't it? Sometimes suicide really is the only way out, but it is so hard to do it because of how strong the SI is. Feel free to talk and vent on this site, there will be people to lend an ear and try their best to understand, if that helps alleviate the pain even temporarily.
Ren Elsie Jewelria
I sneezed!
- Aug 30, 2020
- 373
I feel you. This "pandemic" should be compared to the one from 1918-1919. Ridiculous.
I never wanted to be born either. And they call us sick, freaks, etc.
I never wanted to be born either. And they call us sick, freaks, etc.
I hate feeling like someone that can so easily be thrown away. Is this how things are from now on? I know I'll probably die alone... I don't have any family. I don't have parents that loved and cared for me. I had a horrible life and now all I do is draw stupid cartoons and care way too much about TV shows. Qualities that no one gives a shit about. I can't connect with people around me. Why didn't I like the fucking gym or something like fucking every fucker around me does. Or sports. Or some normal crap...
Where are you located? There are places where people are doing in person therapy. Did in person therapy work for you before the pandemic? I would be happy to help you look for a in person option if that is to overwhelming for you to do on your own. I'm sorry about your pain, I'm listening and if there is something we on this forum can do please don't hesitate to ask for help.
I live in the UK. I live completely alone... All the group therapy things near me are just fucking online all the time. I was doing really well and then this happened and some dude broke my heart and I can't distract myself because the world is fucking frozen...
Is there anything else you like that might be open? Maybe online therapy would be helpful if you had something else in person to distract. What are your hobbies? maybe you could make some art or rock climb to get social interaction and distract yourself. I'm just trying to see if there is a way to help. I hope you get some peace soon
I draw all the time but nothing distracts :(
I'm sorry I know I sound like a truly bitter and miserable person. I've tried really hard in life not to be. I've had a lot of scary times. I'm just tired now...
I just want to go now... I just want life to end. I'm desperate...
I'm sorry I know I sound like a truly bitter and miserable person. I've tried really hard in life not to be. I've had a lot of scary times. I'm just tired now...
I just want to go now... I just want life to end. I'm desperate...
I'm sorry, I wish we didn't have to feel this way. Sending hugs from the US. I hope things get a little better, sometimes a little is a lot.
Acopia
Specialist
- Sep 21, 2020
- 355
I'm so sorry.
I'm in the UK too and another victim of the 'no face to face meetings' MH service rule.
Your feelings are so valid, I am so sorry it has got this bad for you.
- Acopia
I'm in the UK too and another victim of the 'no face to face meetings' MH service rule.
Your feelings are so valid, I am so sorry it has got this bad for you.
- Acopia
I know how this feels. It's been 11 months and I still feel like I'm too worthless to be loved. I wish I could tell you that feeling gets better, but I don't know. It does get less intense with time though. Instead of feeling like getting stabbed in the chest all the time it becomes a deep dull sorrow. I felt desperate and panicked and first too... it does fade over time. I face the same future you do since I also have nobody aside from my little ones. I wish I could offer you more, but I do deeply empathize with you.
I don't understand why schools and shops can still be around but not mental health services!? It's bullcrap...
I'm sorry to hear that. You're always very kind, I wish I could help...
I'm sorry to hear that. You're always very kind, I wish I could help...
I feel the same way for you. Nobody deserves such heartbreak.
Drowning will make you reflex panic. It's terrifying.
I feels like i wrote this post. I'm feeling the exact same thing. sometimes I wish I could be in US with availablity of guns, it would be sure enough way to go instead of searching from different sources to get SN or N and what not
It's just so much homework and I dunno how to get my head around it. Thing about depression is you don't want to put any work in :(
I can understand. I feel so lazy to actually test out whether the product I'm using is legit, getting a proper medicine to go with it, find out how to get prescriptions, writing some kind of a note, avoiding all of these from the family, specially now in this pandemic. I'm sooo tired of this. I wasted my whole day today with headaches, almost felt like grabbing a rope and hanging, but I'm sure I'll botch that and will be at a worse place. I have no idea how some teenagers and small kids are so brave to just go ahead with hanging, it's like the most common way here in India.
Meditation guide
Always was, is, and always shall be.
- Jun 22, 2020
- 6,089
I was reading a long list of people who ctb, and the most common ways by far were hanging, gun to head. and jumping came in a distant third.
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