Please help. i've changed my plan, carbon monoxide. i need some facts, please. leaving in 10 days

[SamK]

Hey all

I am going once and for all this time and i wont be leaving any room to be found by anybody.
I have swung between morphine overdose (i have access to morphine on a regular basis because of severe 10/10 disabling pain, but i dont want to leave room for survival, naloxone would reverse that quickly if i were found, and i dont intend to be found this time (see my last thread, i was almost sectioned, had to go psych ward.)

I have purchased a tent - a malawi tent- which is known to be a good one.
I now need to find some facts on how i can use a bbq to cause carbon monoxide poisoning to end my life.
Now i plan to do this in an entirely secluded spot where i wouldnt be found for weeks, and have made it very, very clear and careful i wont be endangerng anybody. There will be red and yellow neon tape and signs all around for anybody who will find me

Now.. will disposable bbq's be ok? how many of those? what do i do next?
Seal the tent.. have a little alcohol on me but not too much. just enough to help me relax.. some benzos would be good but i wont have any, i can't find any. So what can i use in place of those? to help sedate? I was thinking, i have melatonin, that workks very well for me. I'd ideally like to be nearly asleep before the CO takes me.

Now any advice? i really need it. My life is a misery, i am going once and for all,
I cant do this anymore. I tried meds, hospital. My life has fallen apart, i wont go into it, but nobody would want to live in my shoes
Family are going away in ten days, giving me time to 'run away' with my tent and all else i need, to a secluded spot. I'll stay there for one day, prepping, taping and sealing the tent, making sure i am covering all bases telling people i'm going away for business or something like that (have yet to plan) then .. on a full moon.. (hopefully that night) 24th, i'll be gazing, praying, drinking, reminiscing, listening my music and gently just drift

Do you need my details of height and weight? if so pm me or something. I'm a female of medium build

Thanks for replying

xox

 

[Avicii]

Hey all

I am going once and for all this time and i wont be leaving any room to be found by anybody.
I have swung between morphine overdose (i have access to morphine on a regular basis because of severe 10/10 disabling pain, but i dont want to leave room for survival, naloxone would reverse that quickly if i were found, and i dont intend to be found this time (see my last thread, i was almost sectioned, had to go psych ward.)

I have purchased a tent - a malawi tent- which is known to be a good one.
I now need to find some facts on how i can use a bbq to cause carbon monoxide poisoning to end my life.
Now i plan to do this in an entirely secluded spot where i wouldnt be found for weeks, and have made it very, very clear and careful i wont be endangerng anybody. There will be red and yellow neon tape and signs all around for anybody who will find me

Now.. will disposable bbq's be ok? how many of those? what do i do next?
Seal the tent.. have a little alcohol on me but not too much. just enough to help me relax.. some benzos would be good but i wont have any, i can't find any. So what can i use in place of those? to help sedate? I was thinking, i have melatonin, that workks very well for me. I'd ideally like to be nearly asleep before the CO takes me.

Now any advice? i really need it. My life is a misery, i am going once and for all,
I cant do this anymore. I tried meds, hospital. My life has fallen apart, i wont go into it, but nobody would want to live in my shoes
Family are going away in ten days, giving me time to 'run away' with my tent and all else i need, to a secluded spot. I'll stay there for one day, prepping, taping and sealing the tent, making sure i am covering all bases telling people i'm going away for business or something like that (have yet to plan) then .. on a full moon.. (hopefully that night) 24th, i'll be gazing, praying, drinking, reminiscing, listening my music and gently just drift

Do you need my details of height and weight? if so pm me or something. I'm a female of medium build

Thanks for replying

xox

its a pity xanex blog was removed as she detailed everything which made her death a success using charcoal method except she used a chimney starter rather than disposable barbecues and tipped them into a bucket - i suspect she had a car because the chimney starter is massive and she came up to cumbria from kent and theres no way she could carry the chimney starter on public transport

 

[SamK]

Thanks so much Avicii
I was wondering how she carried that thing!!

I've seen them sold for about £22 but i'll seriously struggle carrying it, and like you say..... if i were to get a taxi to where i'm going with a tent and chimney starter i'm inviting the po to be called or something

I just want to carry light as possible but make sure it'll work. I'm guessing i would need quite a few... taking spares in case some might go out.... i know they're not entirely reliable. So if i bought like 5-6..

 

[SamK]

You will soon find out in ten days if it worked for me either way, i'll keep posting on here but i will keep out the details i need to. I'm not doing this to drawn attn to myself by the way, just saying , may be useful

I think i'll just have to try my best and branstorm for the next week researching. I'll come back with my findings

 

[weedoge]

Hey all

I am going once and for all this time and i wont be leaving any room to be found by anybody.
I have swung between morphine overdose (i have access to morphine on a regular basis because of severe 10/10 disabling pain, but i dont want to leave room for survival, naloxone would reverse that quickly if i were found, and i dont intend to be found this time (see my last thread, i was almost sectioned, had to go psych ward.)

I have purchased a tent - a malawi tent- which is known to be a good one.
I now need to find some facts on how i can use a bbq to cause carbon monoxide poisoning to end my life.
Now i plan to do this in an entirely secluded spot where i wouldnt be found for weeks, and have made it very, very clear and careful i wont be endangerng anybody. There will be red and yellow neon tape and signs all around for anybody who will find me

Now.. will disposable bbq's be ok? how many of those? what do i do next?
Seal the tent.. have a little alcohol on me but not too much. just enough to help me relax.. some benzos would be good but i wont have any, i can't find any. So what can i use in place of those? to help sedate? I was thinking, i have melatonin, that workks very well for me. I'd ideally like to be nearly asleep before the CO takes me.

Now any advice? i really need it. My life is a misery, i am going once and for all,
I cant do this anymore. I tried meds, hospital. My life has fallen apart, i wont go into it, but nobody would want to live in my shoes
Family are going away in ten days, giving me time to 'run away' with my tent and all else i need, to a secluded spot. I'll stay there for one day, prepping, taping and sealing the tent, making sure i am covering all bases telling people i'm going away for business or something like that (have yet to plan) then .. on a full moon.. (hopefully that night) 24th, i'll be gazing, praying, drinking, reminiscing, listening my music and gently just drift

Do you need my details of height and weight? if so pm me or something. I'm a female of medium build

Thanks for replying

xox

Pretty much exactly my plan, CO is so deadly that it would be hard to guarantee being sedated entirely before the CO takes you, but also if it helps put your mind at ease CO is supposed to be so peaceful that even with no sedatives it would still be peaceful. I'm personally probably going to take some alcohol and weak opiate painkillers because that's all I can get.

If you're able to get a malawi tent I would also suggest trying to get hold of a chimney burner... the one time I attempted with disposable bbq I realised it's hard to get an even light on the coals and I'd be worried about that personally. As many people here know there was another member here who succeeded with this method, she used a bbq bucket and some heat mats to stop the floor of the tent from melting. My plan is just to tip coals from a charcoal burner into steel bucket, then place that bucket in a tray of water to minimise the downward heat. A cheap burner can hold maybe 2kg of coals too and light up with absolutely zero issues, it's best to reduce the chance of any human error when doing this, which is probably quite high with disposable bbqs.

It's my plan to try and get as comfortable as possible when I do this too, with a blanket and even a film on my phone lol.

the 8chan thread on it is pretty comprehensive https://8ch.net/suicide/res/36746.html

Sorry you reached this point and best of luck to you ♥

 

[bbq1]

She used one of these. Now half priced.
https://www.homebase.co.uk/jumbuck-portable-bucket-bbq_p405845

She bought the chimney starter from go outdoors. They are biggish but very lightweight. I got one in homebase £7.90

 

[RoloTomasi]

Hey all

I am going once and for all this time and i wont be leaving any room to be found by anybody.
I have swung between morphine overdose (i have access to morphine on a regular basis because of severe 10/10 disabling pain, but i dont want to leave room for survival, naloxone would reverse that quickly if i were found, and i dont intend to be found this time (see my last thread, i was almost sectioned, had to go psych ward.)

I have purchased a tent - a malawi tent- which is known to be a good one.
I now need to find some facts on how i can use a bbq to cause carbon monoxide poisoning to end my life.
Now i plan to do this in an entirely secluded spot where i wouldnt be found for weeks, and have made it very, very clear and careful i wont be endangerng anybody. There will be red and yellow neon tape and signs all around for anybody who will find me

Now.. will disposable bbq's be ok? how many of those? what do i do next?
Seal the tent.. have a little alcohol on me but not too much. just enough to help me relax.. some benzos would be good but i wont have any, i can't find any. So what can i use in place of those? to help sedate? I was thinking, i have melatonin, that workks very well for me. I'd ideally like to be nearly asleep before the CO takes me.

Now any advice? i really need it. My life is a misery, i am going once and for all,
I cant do this anymore. I tried meds, hospital. My life has fallen apart, i wont go into it, but nobody would want to live in my shoes
Family are going away in ten days, giving me time to 'run away' with my tent and all else i need, to a secluded spot. I'll stay there for one day, prepping, taping and sealing the tent, making sure i am covering all bases telling people i'm going away for business or something like that (have yet to plan) then .. on a full moon.. (hopefully that night) 24th, i'll be gazing, praying, drinking, reminiscing, listening my music and gently just drift

Do you need my details of height and weight? if so pm me or something. I'm a female of medium build

Thanks for replying

xox

I'd recommend using a chimney starter to light up the coals. Let the charcoal burn for about 30 minutes to an hour, usually the raging flames will already be out and the smoke will be minimal by this time. Most of the charcoal should be ashy gray/white in appearance by then, though some could still be glowing.

Alchohol plus sleeping pills will do, some are able to go through with it with just alchohol or no help from those at all, but not really recommended. As the CO builds up, some discomfort (slight pain?) is very likely, shortness of breath etc.

 

[SamK]

Thank you so much!!!!! I love you all . Seriously

Someone who feels the same way i do (very intent, probably going to go through with it) asked me why i'm on such a site. I told them .. I know it wont change my mind , i'm determined but it will stop me from suffering through it and potentially being half brain dead in the process.
'm sorry we all reached this point I just feel immense peace at the thought of it all stopping.
Thanks so much. I'm stuck that payday is in 14 days so i might have to hold on those three extra for the spare bits will need, like chimney starter. May also have found a P.


Weedoge
''the one time I attempted with disposable bbq I realised it's hard to get an even light on the coals and I'd be worried about that personally. As many people here know there was another member here who succeeded with this method, she used a bbq bucket and some heat mats to stop the floor of the tent from melting. My plan is just to tip coals from a charcoal burner into steel bucket, then place that bucket in a tray of water to minimise the downward heat.''

Thank you so much. See? i never even thought about heat mats, i'm going to need those as well . You're right, i agree on the disposable bbq's they dont seem reliable they are tough enough to get started to cook burgers let alone this, ha. Got to laugh else you will cry

i plan on making myself comfortable too. I'll just be drifting to sleep and waking up without my body as far as i'm concerned. Also going to do the same as you. I don't watch movies much but i'll have my music on and I do have access to opiate which will help, i'm sure . I will not be getting out of the tent but survival instinct is a real thing. At most i imagine my heart will me thumping out my chest but i prefer this method as it's quick and will just take me in sleep. It's probably one of the easiest but guaranteed lethal if i do it right so i'm going to get a chimney starter. Thanks so much.

God, it will be nice to not be interfered with. I just need to choose my spot as well. I'm very lucky i live very close to the hillsides and there's a good chance i wont be found for a month where I originally intended to go, but again , I still need to keep mental health people off my back so right now i'm keeping up this ''im doing great, my antidepressant is working''

 

[SamK]

Again, got to laugh else you will cry, after all this acting that i'm ok i could star in coronation street at this point

 

[weedoge]

She used one of these. Now half priced.
https://www.homebase.co.uk/jumbuck-portable-bucket-bbq_p405845

She bought the chimney starter from go outdoors. They are biggish but very lightweight. I got one in homebase £7.90

Yeah I wasn't sure about the bucket, it was actually the first time I'd heard of it. but if you can't get one of those (you should be able to if you can get a burner though I suppose) then a generic steel bucket that can hold at least 1kg preferably more should be enough.

This explains why a heat mat was sufficient for her too though, since it's stood partially off the ground.

 

[Miss clefable]

Yeah I wasn't sure about the bucket, it was actually the first time I'd heard of it. but if you can't get one of those (you should be able to if you can get a burner though I suppose) then a generic steel bucket that can hold at least 1kg preferably more should be enough.

This explains why a heat mat was sufficient for her too though, since it's stood partially off the ground.

Can I just use an oven

 

[Miss clefable]

Good luck though I wish you peace

 

[weedoge]

Can I just use an oven

No! Charcoal burning is very well documented take a look at the posts people have already written. The coals have to combust (flames and then smouldering) not just cook.

The reason most people use a very similar method with few tweaks is because we know it works.

 

[bbq1]

Yes they sit about 3 inches off the floor so no downward heat transfer.
Wilko's do them for £9
Sainsbury's too.

All those shops will start clearing shelves of bbq stuff very soon as summer is over.
Homebase keep good stocks all year.

 

[Miss clefable]

No! Charcoal burning is very well documented take a look at the posts people have already written. The coals have to combust (flames and then smouldering) not just cook.

The reason most people use a very similar method with few tweaks is because we know it works.

I know this already

 

[akosineenee]

Hey @SamK. Glad to see you back here. CO is my method of choice too. Although my deadline isn't until the end of the year. I'm just ticking off items on my list of preparations and getting other affairs in order. @bbq1, @weedoge, @RoloTomasi are pretty knowledgeable about this method and are able to answer your questions. Please update when you can. It's nice hearing from you. We're here up until your last.

Edit: Everyone is here to help in any way we can.

 

[Regisphilbin_savant]

Make sure tent is totally sealed off for maximum co buildup

 

[RM5998]

As the CO builds up, some discomfort (slight pain?) is very likely, shortness of breath etc.

This is only happening if CO buildup is gradual. If the coals are brought in at the right time, the tent is small enough and there's no leakage, there isn't going to be time for discomfort.

 

[RoloTomasi]

This is only happening if CO buildup is gradual. If the coals are brought in at the right time, the tent is small enough and there's no leakage, there isn't going to be time for discomfort.

Yes, maybe it is a good idea to probably let it sit there for about half an hour before finally going in. A fraction of CO is also lost upon opening the door, a tester let out 1000+ ppm but at least there is already more of it to begin with.

 

[SamK]

Thank you so much!! So I have a rough idea, I'm going to get a charcoal starter leave it in, maybe 45 mins ? Or is that long unnecessary?
Will duct tape be good enough?

 

[Regisphilbin_savant]

Thank you so much!! So I have a rough idea, I'm going to get a charcoal starter leave it in, maybe 45 mins ? Or is that long unnecessary?
Will duct tape be good enough?

If u can use yellow gas thread seal tape

 

[SamK]

Brilliant I'll look on amazon thanks so much

No room for failure this time, had never heard of that tape but I'll get it

 

[RoloTomasi]

Thank you so much!! So I have a rough idea, I'm going to get a charcoal starter leave it in, maybe 45 mins ? Or is that long unnecessary?
Will duct tape be good enough?

It depends on the type/brand of charcoal, you just have to observe it's appearance to know that it's good to go, but too long in the chimney, it'll crumble to bits. Duct tape is probably good enough, but not 100% sure.

 

[CentreMid]

I don't know much about this method but I wish you good luck​

 

[SamK]

Thanks Rolo that helps a lot. I'm not sure either so doubt i will risk it. Crap the tent will be completely covered in tape by the time i'm finished with it

I'l look around at charcoal, thanks for the info i'll steer clear of the cheapest one. Nothing to lose right?
I've got some information saved from Zane thread now so that should help a lot. Thanks so much for your help and support. Once again it's just so nice to have a non judgemental, adult conversation withut people skipping in to tell us it's all wrong.

So.. tape
warning posters about CO.
got tent
charcoal
chimney starter i need to get or** a bucket.. can hold up to 2kg coals. good good.
a heat resistant stand
some whiskey

Have some idea how long to leave it in tent, 30 minutes at least prior to getting in..levels will drop when i open, so get in quick as poss but it'll be enough anyway
And i need to make sure they combust, burn, then smoulder.

This is great thank you thank you.
I'm trying to think now what else... anything?

Weather- that's important right?. If it rains, I should wait?

 

[SamK]

The tent is water proof but still. I'm thinking how it could affect it somehow, .. i really want no room for failure. I'm catching my bus once and for all. Thanks.

 

[Over n' Out]

Don't light charcoal in the rain or get it damp before lighting. Obvious really.

 

[RoloTomasi]

Thanks Rolo that helps a lot. I'm not sure either so doubt i will risk it. Crap the tent will be completely covered in tape by the time i'm finished with it

I'l look around at charcoal, thanks for the info i'll steer clear of the cheapest one. Nothing to lose right?
I've got some information saved from Zane thread now so that should help a lot. Thanks so much for your help and support. Once again it's just so nice to have a non judgemental, adult conversation withut people skipping in to tell us it's all wrong.

So.. tape
warning posters about CO.
got tent
charcoal
chimney starter i need to get or** a bucket.. can hold up to 2kg coals. good good.
a heat resistant stand
some whiskey

Have some idea how long to leave it in tent, 30 minutes at least prior to getting in..levels will drop when i open, so get in quick as poss but it'll be enough anyway
And i need to make sure they combust, burn, then smoulder.

This is great thank you thank you.
I'm trying to think now what else... anything?

Weather- that's important right?. If it rains, I should wait?

I'd rather not risk doing it while it's raining. Also, the warning signs are not necessary since you're doing it outdoors, the CO will dissipate quickly once the tent is opened, there will be not much danger to those who will come across your tent.

 

[bbq1]

Here's a demo of the bucket style bbq. You'll notice these wally's don't use a chimney starter so resort to wafting cardboard at the briqettes in desperation..

Anyway, at least you get an idea of what they're like. Amazon have lots too.

 

[bbq1]

90c !