S

S1mpleme

Mage
Dec 27, 2019
517
What's the difference and how to understand which is in my case? I'm not of one those who want to CTB for decades. I'm thinking about it about few months so far. I don't have any mental or physical illness and I want to CTB not because of circumstances happened recently, but because of my entire life. I've analyzed my past and now I understand I don't want to continue, I don't know my future, there is a chance for a miracle of course, but no guarantee.
 
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Flippy

Flippy

Felis Sapien
Jan 5, 2020
931
I guess an impulsive ctb is one that isn't the result of careful planning and reflection over a fairly long period of time. I would say my attempts particularly when I was younger were fairly impulsive, not well thought out. Like I would just decide that day and gather up what I thought would work. And it didn't. Or something would happen that would push me into improvising something, like a "I can't cope with this any more" moment. I was afraid of researching methods at the time as I thought it might set off alarm bells. Now I'm less paranoid I research and plan. So I think my thought process isn't impulsive. Those are my thoughts.
 
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Quarky00

Quarky00

Enlightened
Dec 17, 2019
1,956
That's an interesting question (and post) for me, because I've wondered the same myself.

I saw many members here (and when I had friends) in an emotional mess, which I totally get and experienced before. But my death thoughts/attempts were rarely impulsive or emotional - perhaps twice or thrice - almost always calculated, thoughtful ; like a foregone conclusion. Obviously it comes from a similar distressful place like the impulsive type. But It does make me feel a bit odd within SS community.

Your personal point is also interesting. You don't owe us/me a reason to ctb, but I'm curious about having no specific cause but "my entire life"? There's something about it that rings familiar. :hug:
 
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x-Ace-x

x-Ace-x

Experienced
Aug 20, 2019
295
In my opinion you should only consider a planned suicide because sometimes the situation can become better after a few days and you no longer wanna kill yourself. Of course, only you can decide what is right for you :)

My mindset has changed over the years and I no longer care what people will think after I'm gone. That makes the ctb much easier for me.

Impulsive ctb is more dangerous if the method is not violent or effective enough. You may end up seriously hurt and in pain without it actually working.
 
C

calendulo

Enlightened
Jun 13, 2019
1,016
Could be vital tiredness, like me.
No mental or physical illness as you say, therefore............no rush.

Imho, you should to do a planning, according your personal point of view, of course. Take your time for choosing the best option. And you try to answer all questions......First question: How?....second: Where? and finally the most important question When?.

Well, all of them are important.
 
T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
The only advantage of being impulsive is that it gives you more courage. Or that's what I feel. But planned suicide if well planned gives you more probability of success. That's how I see it.
 
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Intelligent Ape

Intelligent Ape

Evolutionary dead end
Jun 23, 2019
42
It's not opposite subjects as for me. Now I can prepare my mind, plan my method, place and many other things even clothes but I can't choose a date. But when I'll get a impulse I hope that I can be prepared enough.

"Meditation on inevitable death should be performed daily. Every day when one's body and mind are at peace, one should meditate upon being ripped apart by arrows, rifles, spears and
swords, being carried away by surging waves, being thrown into the midst of a great fire, being struck by lightning, being shaken to death by a great earthquake, falling from thousand-foot cliffs, dying of disease or committing seppuku at the death of one's master. And every day without fail one should consider himself as dead
." Hagakure
 
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Flippy

Flippy

Felis Sapien
Jan 5, 2020
931
It's not opposite subjects as for me. Now I can prepare my mind, plan my method, place and many other things even clothes but I can't choose a date. But when I'll get a impulse I hope that I can be prepared enough.

"Meditation on inevitable death should be performed daily. Every day when one's body and mind are at peace, one should meditate upon being ripped apart by arrows, rifles, spears and
swords, being carried away by surging waves, being thrown into the midst of a great fire, being struck by lightning, being shaken to death by a great earthquake, falling from thousand-foot cliffs, dying of disease or committing seppuku at the death of one's master. And every day without fail one should consider himself as dead
." Hagakure
Just wondering if your signature is from the art of war? I read it a long time ago, just wondering if my memory is still functioning? :-)
 
BPD Barbie

BPD Barbie

Visionary
Dec 1, 2019
2,361
I think pre-planned gives you chance to get your affairs in order, make funerals plans, wills, finances, notes etc. You have chance to make sure this is 100% the right thing. If you decide, for example, to hang yourself impulsively, the second you step off the chair or whatever and you regret it, it's too late. I wouldn't want to die regretfully.
 

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