When people say that there are others who have it worse than you, do they expect you to suddenly decide never to feel bad about something ever again?
Me: So... Saying you aren't allowed to be sad bc others have it worse is like saying you can't be happy bc others have it better.
Have you heard of any other brilliant comments made by PEOPLE?
Not just that kind of commentary but the kind where they say "well look at so and so with their problems, and they're still living life." That is so irrelevant. I am not them and they are not me.
My dad knows I don't want to go out with the way I look and he said once "Well look at Donald Trump, he looks awful and he's out there doing whatever he wants"
GEE THANKS dad
Also whenever I bring up people who have it so much BETTER than me, even other family members, with my mom..she gets so mad and tells me not to bring them into this. She gets so nasty and refuses to talk, acts like she has to protect the people I'm bringing up as if I'm insulting them! As if THEY are the ones in this situation when they're not.
When I bring them up, I'm literally complimenting them. The things I say could blow up anyone's ego until it popped..and yet she acts like that.
It's because she knows the truth of this Hell. That her daughter got the s*** end of the stick and making comparisons to -even just the people around us- makes it so much more obvious and appalling.
She acknowledges everything and then she will walk backwards into denial. And back and forth. Dangling her support over my head like a piece of meat. She can be good to me but overall, she is the cruelest to me out of all 3 children. Mothers and their sons, let me tell you. You'd think i'd At least have my dad. What dad doesn't want his daughter to be beautiful and happy. But nope, he says life is only for suffering. And he thinks his own suffering tops everyone else's. Even his own child who hasn't even gotten a chance to live. At least he got that much at my age.
A friend I used to talk to on the phone had the same experience as far as favoritism goes. And the back and forth of support and threats of emotional abandonment.
Now sometimes even I want to tell someone to piss off with what they're complaining about, because I see them in possession of what I would need to survive and whining about things I could take in stride.
It can get really hard not to say something. But everyone reacts differently to different things. Somethings can kill one person while another person brushes it off like an annoying fly.
Saying someone else has it worse is not helpful. It is dismissive.
And besides, there's ALWAYS someone who has it worse.
That statement can be made to everyone and anyone.
And thus, essentially begins to mean nothing.
On this note, does anyone also get the feeling that they aren't "ALLOWED" to have any other problems than the ones higher on the totem pole-so to speak.
I feel like I am not allowed to have any more problems even if I actually do. Or that I'm not allowed to complain about all the normal little things most people do.
My mother even says I have a limit on the amount of issues I can throw at her.
I can't help that I'm that bad off!
It's like if a kid lost 3 limbs and the mom said "now listen Jimmy, we can work with the first two, but that's it. You can't keep complaining about the third one after all this. Got it?"
