T
the_final_countdown
Specialist
- Dec 29, 2020
- 337
I'm trying my best not to be bitter about what happened to me.
I understand life can be unfair. To everyone. There's a sort of fairness there. Nobody goes unscathed.
I'm searching for a new method. Trying to find my fathers gun. I believe he still has it. And I think I may know where it is.
I'm trying not to have any regrets or focusing on what could've been.
There's no free will so life was always destined to be this way.
I want to have a graceful death.
Emotionally. I know the panic and the fear and the sorrow. Its instinct you cannot repress. I understand.
I want a singular moment where I can die with some dignity. As a man if that makes any sense, facing their fate with courage. A fate I chose.
Almost like a holy ritual.
A gun might give me that. I don't imagine I could maintain composure with poison. I would give in to the mayhem.
There's a quiet place where I live. A trail up a small mountain. It's beautiful and lonely.
I would love to die there.
I understand life can be unfair. To everyone. There's a sort of fairness there. Nobody goes unscathed.
I'm searching for a new method. Trying to find my fathers gun. I believe he still has it. And I think I may know where it is.
I'm trying not to have any regrets or focusing on what could've been.
There's no free will so life was always destined to be this way.
I want to have a graceful death.
Emotionally. I know the panic and the fear and the sorrow. Its instinct you cannot repress. I understand.
I want a singular moment where I can die with some dignity. As a man if that makes any sense, facing their fate with courage. A fate I chose.
Almost like a holy ritual.
A gun might give me that. I don't imagine I could maintain composure with poison. I would give in to the mayhem.
There's a quiet place where I live. A trail up a small mountain. It's beautiful and lonely.
I would love to die there.