Parents should be more supportive of their children's decision to ctb

[paredler]

If I have a child and I gamble on his future and his future turns out bleak and he''s been suffering for years by traumatizing experiences with no means or hope for recovery, it's my responsibility as a parent to support his decision to stop his suffering, suffering that I, indirectly, created but couldn't stop. If I have a child and he can't figure his life out and doesn't find his place, and therefore, he suffers daily from gruelling living conditions, I wouldn't want him to suffer. Parents should be less arrogant over their "ownership" of their children and should be let a helping hand for those they gave birth do and are related to by blood.

 

[Agon321]

Not feasible.

The vast majority of people will not simply let their child kill themselves.
This is a line that few people can cross.
Instincts are strong.

I'm not going to judge whether this is good or bad, because the answer may vary depending on the context and the person.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I think for a lot of parents it would be harder to truly support your child's suicide than it is for someone to work up the courage to actually kill themselves. Like the people above me said, parental instincts can be incredibly strong. If the kid had a terminal illness or quality of life affecting major medical condition, something like where they couldn't move and speak or had extreme uncontrolled pain, then I could see some parents being on board with euthanasia. But the typical complaints of depression, can't work, can't find relationship, no friends, etc. I don't see most parents giving you their blessing to CTB, and while it would be nice I guess, you don't really need it. I don't want to traumatize my dad further by arguing about why he should support me offing myself.

 

[Morte]

They were selfish to bring you here, surely they'r going to be selfish not to let you leave. You can't expect anything that doesn't please these wolves.

 

[lostintheloop]

I don't think it's necessarily just about 'ownership' . If a parent genuinely does love their child, of course they will do everything in their power to 'save' them. Yes it might not always be in their child's best interests and I'm not going to go into arguments about that right now. But in their eyes they just can't let go. It's only natural instincts to want to save and protect your own family, regardless of what's right or wrong .
It's like when people refuse to sign a dnr for elderly dying relatives because they love them and can't stand to lose them. Yes it's selfish and puts them at greater harm. But it goes against instinct to say no more to treatments for a loved one. Like turning off life support even when it's hopeless can feel like you're the one killing them.

 

[rebelnow111]

If I have a child and I gamble on his future and his future turns out bleak and he''s been suffering for years by traumatizing experiences with no means or hope for recovery, it's my responsibility as a parent to support his decision to stop his suffering, suffering that I, indirectly, created but couldn't stop. If I have a child and he can't figure his life out and doesn't find his place, and therefore, he suffers daily from gruelling living conditions, I wouldn't want him to suffer. Parents should be less arrogant over their "ownership" of their children and should be let a helping hand for those they gave birth do and are related to by blood.

very true mine never took responsibility for thier cruel abusive behavior twords me and how it messed my life up.

 

[Deleted member 8119]

I'm gonna be honest, I don't buy the instincts thing. Sure, there's strong attachment, but in any relationship one should learn to let go. Trying to get closer to someone who doesn't want it will will push them away more. If one's to start any bond, this is thr first thing you should learn.

It's not about how strong instincts are, it's about the harm you'll do by holding on. Parenting is usually a choice that requires lots of thought, and you take full responsibility over the life you created. You accept a huge risk when you conceive them, and if you can't, having them isn't the best for either part. If you do anyway, I don't think holding their hand too much is a solution.

Not saying that "procreation is selfish" or anything, just that it massive huge risks and responsibilities.

 

[justwannadip]

This is retarded. To expect this from any healthy parent is insane unless the condition is certainly untreatable and will certainly cause constant and permanent physical or mental pain that is consistent with an insufficient quality of life. While this is likely for many of us, this is almost impossible to measure or prove with any certainty with major mental illnesses unfortunately, even if it looks incredibly bleak. Physical illnesses are more likely to be understood.

 

[noairtobreathe1]

Most parents (well, the good ones anyway) won't support a child's decision to ctb. Like others said, it's parental instinct to care for your child and try to save them. Lots of other factors too - the shame/stigma involving it for family members (no one wants to admit freely to friends and acquaintances that their child ended things so of course you'd discourage it) or even sunk-cost fallacy. A parent spends a lot of their time, energy, and money raising a child, in a way a child is an investment for their future - whether that's to be a caretaker when a parent is elderly, source of income, or just plain companionship and reciprocated love. I guess I'm a bit pessimistic, I think parents bring children into this world only to help advance themselves in some way. The overall cost and time of child-rearing isn't worth it unless you can get something out of it.

I've already argued with my parents plenty about how they should just let me go in peace, but I'll never win that argument and get them to concede. I've stopped trying. I feel awful when they cry and plea with me, but overall it's never changed my feelings. Maybe that makes me a cruel person but I think the authority to control my own life outweighs any of their feelings about the manner.

 

[Justnotme]

If I have a child and I gamble on his future and his future turns out bleak and he''s been suffering for years by traumatizing experiences with no means or hope for recovery, it's my responsibility as a parent to support his decision to stop his suffering, suffering that I, indirectly, created but couldn't stop. If I have a child and he can't figure his life out and doesn't find his place, and therefore, he suffers daily from gruelling living conditions, I wouldn't want him to suffer. Parents should be less arrogant over their "ownership" of their children and should be let a helping hand for those they gave birth do and are related to by blood.

Please be my parent :( It's a joke, but a sad joke. I just wanted to highlight how much I agree with you

 

[Worndown]

It will be the rare situation when a parent just lets them go.
Being a parent creates the exact opposite motivations. Our purpose it to assist a childs growth, developement and success in their own way. One cannot easily say "ok" to death unless there are other, very serious issues involved in that choice.
(a few damaged parents referenced in other posts excluded)

 

[EternalSummer]

Bro, you would have a better chance at asking your boss to share his salary with you than conving your parents to accept your choice to CTB. That goes against every instinct in their heart and is the only reason that I still havent done it. However, I recently made my mind that it's in my right to do so, gonna try to make it as clear as possible that this is not their fault, that I love them and that I'm very sorry for the imeasurable suffering I'll cause them, but that there's no other way.

 

[Chinaski]

You don't need your parents support to kill yourself why is the "selfishness of parents" as a discussion point allowed to go this far and still be taken seriously

 

[KillingPain267]

I totally agree, and was thinking the same thing as I was walking home from the bus today: Ideally, my parents would help me support and execute my plans and desires to ctb. Since they are the only ones realistically responsible for me existing, THEY would have to pay for things as either recovery or ctb, whatever which I, as a child, desire. They should bite down any emotions they may have of me leaving, since THEY are responsible for me being here (and suffering).

 

[Chinaski]

I totally agree, and was thinking the same thing as I was walking home from the bus today: Ideally, my parents would help me support and execute my plans and desires to ctb. Since they are the only ones realistically responsible for me existing, THEY would have to pay for things as either recovery or ctb, whatever which I, as a child, desire. They should bite down any emotions they may have of me leaving, since THEY are responsible for me being here (and suffering).

Why should anyone help to "execute" your plans? Literally nobody needs their parents assistance to kill themselves what the hell is all this, please listen to yourselves and ask yourself is this is adult level thinking

 

[KillingPain267]

I totally agree, and was thinking the same thing as I was walking home from the bus today: Ideally, my parents would help me support and execute my plans and desires to ctb. Since they are the only ones realistically responsible for me existing, THEY would have to pay for things as either recovery or ctb, whatever which I, as a child, desire. They should bite down any emotions they may have of me leaving, since THEY are responsible for me being here (and suffering).

Why should anyone help to "execute" your plans? Literally nobody needs their parents assistance to kill themselves what the hell is all this, please listen to yourselves and ask yourself is this is adult level thinking

To "kill themselves" in PEACEFUL ways, is what I mean, sorry. Parents should help pay for the trip to Switzerland or get N or whatever, to secure the most peaceful, painless exits as possible. Things that are currently banned for most of the population of the world.

 

[SilentSadness]

I agree. I don't think it's much to ask for a parent to let go of their children. Seems like the overall sentiment is "parents own their children" which is very toxic and literally slavery. It's twisted that someone can give birth to a child and then own them just like that. Although if someone gave birth I'm not surprised they lack the empathy to support their child's ctb, most parents only think about themselves anyway.

 

[Tesha]

I really cannot believe I'm reading that people actually expect their parents to not only be 'supportive' of them wanting to kill themselves, but pay for it as well. Would you like them to mix the SN or tie the knot in the rope too?

There will be very few parents, in very limited circumstances that would ever entertain this as a reasonable conversation (terminally ill children maybe).

 

[nembutal]

every day i think ive found the most "" post on here and every day i find an even more bizarre one.

you understand that antinatalism and suicidal intent isn't normal at all right. i hate this sentiment that somehow the people around us exhibiting normal levels of compassion and a survival instinct are somehow illogical and cruel for not encouraging everyone to off themselves. imagine a parent were to ask you to just stop being suicidal and completely change your mindset towards life. for you that seems senseless no? just like it is senseless to ask someone to go against their instinct and encourage someone from their species to die…

 

[Deleted member 8119]

I can't speak for the rest, but In no way I expect others to encourage to die. The only I want is people not actively sabotaging suicidal people when they choose to, because I think the right to die is more important. Just not locking people, or menacing, or belittling them, which more parents than you think do.

And you also underestimate how many people world-wide have children for convenience rather than genuine love, the all-loving first world parent stereotype is far from the norm as well. What you refer as "paternal instinct", is actually a form of love, a strong attachment sadly not everyone has. And apart of that, it still doesn't explain the huge amount of parents that regret their children, or come to dislike them for multiple reasons.

This doesn't mean I expect parents to commit illegal activity in assisting suicide. I'm not that stupid. Don't know about the rest, but that's unrealistic. I literally just ask for the bare minimum, and if people can't do the simplest things, I'm sorry but we have a way bigger problem than "paternal instincts".

 

[Davey36000]

Many of the posts in this forum are pushing the line, but this is just insane, sorry.

Children can barely rationalize properly and it's not true that you can't heal from suffering/trauma.

 

[Redleaf1992]

To be fair to my parents when my brother was under 2yrs old he required a heart transplant or likely pass in days or weeks. They didn't want surgery and prefer he be happy and spend what time they had with him rather than potentially suffer a lot of pain for a few extra years.

Under pressure from the hospital etc to agree, they finally accepted. He ended up with severe brain damage, unable to move, talk or see properly until he passed at 17.

That said I think suicide is a compeltley different ball game. 99percent of people can not see suicide as something but I un-rational, your parents will always try and prevent this thinking it's for your own good. They might accept that you are better of moving on from this world from severe physical pain but never mental.

 

[lacrimosa]

Yeah, my parents lack of caring caused many of the issues I have indirectly. They were a product of their time so didn't know better, but god damn, how could they be so stupid?

 

[paredler]

every day i think ive found the most "" post on here and every day i find an even more bizarre one.

you understand that antinatalism and suicidal intent isn't normal at all right. i hate this sentiment that somehow the people around us exhibiting normal levels of compassion and a survival instinct are somehow illogical and cruel for not encouraging everyone to off themselves. imagine a parent were to ask you to just stop being suicidal and completely change your mindset towards life. for you that seems senseless no? just like it is senseless to ask someone to go against their instinct and encourage someone from their species to die…

Where in my post did I say parents should encourage their children to die?

Many of the posts in this forum are pushing the line, but this is just insane, sorry.

Children can barely rationalize properly and it's not true that you can't heal from suffering/trauma.

You really thought I meant young children? Fuck, you're even dumber than I thought.
I meant adult children who have lived a few decades and have been suffering from severe things like trauma, poverty, homelessness, rape, or recurring state of stress and suffering.