Story Overdosed last year and still feel the effects to this day (Why OD'ing is a non-method and a terrible idea)

[scary]

Last year in mid October I was doing especially bad mental-health wise and one day while I was having an episode whilst home alone I decided to overdose on a handful of Ibuprofen, knowing full well that it wouldn't kill me, along with some melatonin to force myself to go to sleep. At the time I felt fine, but months later and to this day I feel this dull ache and weirdness in my lower intestines that I know full well is from when I OD'd.

I should've just gone to the hospital after the fact, but the shame I'd feel having to explain to my family that I was actively harming myself is worse than the pain. Not only that but every single time in my life I've gone to the doctors I've been dismissed and treated like there's nothing wrong with me. Last major hospital visit for me the doctor was a complete douchebag and just saw me as a hysterical female (ignoring the fact I literally went blind and lost my hearing for a hot minute, but fuck me right?)

Please for the love of Christ do not follow in my footsteps if you're new to SaSu and don't know much about certain methods. Even if you're like me and are thinking about doing it as an act of self harm rather than CTB, please just don't bother, there are other ways to do it if you really want to sh. At this point I don't really care if my body is messed up, and if it kills me? even better.