Discussion Overcoming Fear of Death/Attachment To Life?

[kane]

It seems to me that the primary thing preventing me from ctb is fear. Which makes sense from an evolutionary point of view. Those who are willing to endure any amount of suffering to delay death might be more likely to survive long enough to procreate. But that's not so good from the point of view of individual experience. I don't want to be desperately clinging on to life as my situation deteriorates beyond any hope of recovery. I believe there are many circumstances where it really is preferable to skip to the end.

Obviously some are able to overcome that kind of fear and exit. I just struggle to see how I'm ever going to get myself to that kind of mindset. I've always been an extremely cautious and fearful person. But I would like to get to a position where I'm able to calmly decide to let go of life, when it seems sensible to do so. Rather than being driven to it long after I would want to, after going through much greater suffering.

My mind goes to the famous image of the Buddhist monk who set himself on fire as a protest against war, and sat there calmly burning to death. I wouldn't choose to go out that way. but I would like to develop some of that kind of self-control/mastery of fear. Does anyone have any ideas or experience along those lines? I've read about some studies of those with terminal illness whose fear of death was greatly diminished by ketamine use? Or somehow reducing the attachment to the survival of the self through ego-transcendent drugs (LSD etc)? I wonder if I got good enough at meditation I could begin to approach that level of detachment & self-control?

 

[StateOfMind]

I have been debating to myself weather the method in question has any correlation to the survival instinct.
I don't think it does.. I believe the method is largely irrelevant and it mostly plays out in your head.
As long as the method is lethal that is.

I'm struggling with SI too..

 

[kane]

I have been debating to myself weather the method in question has any correlation to the survival instinct.
I don't think it does.. I believe the method is largely irrelevant and it mostly plays out in your head.
As long as the method is lethal that is.

I'm struggling with SI too..

I'm not sure for me it's even at the level of 'survival instinct'. I think before even approaching an attempt there would be this barrier of a kind of irrational desire to live. No matter how miserable I was. For years now I've been telling myself I need to research methods and obtain equipment. And I haven't. There's this stubborn unconscious resistance to the idea of dying.