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apearl
mitski fan
- Sep 25, 2023
- 130
As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.
As if anyone wants to be sad on purpose. I personally try to suppress my negative thoughts, but they always pop up eventually feeling like it's not something I can control. That's why some people like me seek to numb emotions with substances despite knowing how poisonous it is. I would prefer not being in that abyss, but it's not easy to just switch off. When I hear people like the person in the video say things like that, and saying they fixed themselves, I cannot help but think they haven't experienced real depression.Sure it is- to an extent. It's pretty hard not to be self obsessed when you're sad though. We're sentient beings that have heightened awareness of ourselves and the space we live in. Some of the things that happen in our lives are deeply unpleasant.
Someone we care about dies, we become unwell, something we've worked very hard to achieve at, we fail in, someone says or does something cruel to us. Those things- surely rightly cause us to be unhappy. Maybe the real problems occur when we can't bring ourselves out of that emotion. So, we almost become obsessed with the emotion itself. We notice all the time that we feel sad.
That's surely a question a lot of people are asking themselves througout the day though: 'How am I? Does anything hurt? Does anything need fixing?' Surely, that's how we self regulate. We're constantly aware of our needs. Am I hungry, thirsty, too hot or cold, how am I feeling? I think we're maybe 'fixers' by nature. We look for problems and try to fix them. When we can't though, we get kind of obsessive about it. Like- shit- I'm still unhappy. What can I do about it?
Plus, if it gets too bad, we may reach a point where we find it difficult to work. Difficult to find the energy to look after ourselves. So- with less task based activities to occupy our brains, they likely will obsess about our sadness even more.
Plus, I think we can start to find a kind of comfort in it. Feelings of sadness, apathy, lethargy can also lead us to not challenge ourselves. That can feel like a nice break if all you've been encouraged to do in life is push yourself, face your fears, take risks. It can be nice to let yourself off the hook as it were.
What's the alternative though? Distract ourselves by obsessing over something else? Work? Who does that benefit? Our (likely fairly heartless) pay masters. Relationships? Too much obsession towards another surely leads to things like codependency, which isn't healthy either.
I think more though, there's this assumption that if only people live a more 'normal' life. Where they interact with others, have a busy schedule, have lots of things to think about- that will stop them being sad. I know from experience that it doesn't though. You simply get home from work, exhausted from the day itself and having to put on a facade and just cry your eyes out!
I remember Stephen Fry talking about depression and those doubters who say it isn't real. He compared that to someone standing in a rainstorm but swearing that it wasn't raining. Surely- we're either sad or, we're not. Maybe there are things we can do to move ourselves beyond that emotion but, maybe not always.
As if anyone wants to be sad on purpose. I personally try to suppress my negative thoughts, but they always pop up eventually feeling like it's not something I can control. That's why some people like me seek to numb emotions with substances despite knowing how poisonous it is. I would prefer not being in that abyss, but it's not easy to just switch off. When I hear people like the person in the video say things like that, and saying they fixed themselves, I cannot help but think they haven't experienced real depression.
Exactly. A truly selfless person is also self-sacrificial, and does what others expect no matter how much it hurts. This person will not be happy, but grieved. It's actually offensive or condescending to be happy go lucky in front of a person in mourning. Try to go to a funeral with a big smile on your face, lol.To be honest, I didn't watch the video. I find that kind of stuff really irritating. Plus, I would agree. I think there are different levels of depression. I am still able to function, I just find it difficult. I'm not even sure that I am depressed although, maybe. I'd personally admit that I could do more to help myself but, I chose not to out of fear and lazyness. Although, surely apathy is a part of depression.
I was thinking around this whole question more today though and it struck me- who are the more self obsessed? Happy or unhappy people? If we look around the world at all the suffering- and there is shit loads of it going on- how can a truly selfless person actually be happy in such a world? Presumably, because things are going reasonably well for them personally. So- who's the more selfish person now? Surely, it's the one who can block out all the awful things happening to everyone else and just focus on what they want.