One last thing...

[Baguette]

There's this girl I like at college, I've barely ever spoken to her because of my autism and social anxiety, I'm pretty sure I'd have absolutely no chance with her but is it worth trying to strike up a conversation and see if I could maybe at least get a first date?

I'm pretty determined to ctb at this point as my life is absolutely terrible but I could at least try even though I'll struggle with what to say to her, either things goe well(unlikely) or I get embarrassed which wouldn't matter anyway as I'd soon be dead for the rest of the time. I'm seeing this is a last shot at turning things around but I don't expect to be able to.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

How are you with reading social cues? How does she act toward you?

If she's open to being asked out, there should be signs. You say you've barely talked to her, but what is it like when you do? Does she pay attention to what you say? Does she act like she wants to talk to you more? Or does she just answer and then seem like she's ready to pay attention to other things? If she's not making an effort to engage with you, she's not interested. If she makes the effort, then she may be interested.

If you can read these social cues, then you'll have an idea of whether it's worth the risk.

If you feel like she's open, just going up to her and asking her out may be awkward if you haven't talked much. Instead, it would be good to try to have more conversations. Have you noticed anything she's interested in that you have in common? Or is there something you'd like to know about her? If the conversation is going well, you can ask her if she'd like to continue talking at a cafe or place to get something to eat. If she says yes, cool. Or she may say she can't right now but offer a different time. If she doesn't want to, she'll beg off. Even better, you can have a short conversation and end it because you need to get to a class, library, whatever. You can notice how she acts about the conversation ending. Then the next time you see her, notice if she notices you. Does she light up? Does she approach you? Does she turn away? These will give you clues as to whether it's wise to pursue her or let it go.

Also, have you noticed if she's also shy, or is she outgoing? Have you noticed how she treats other people? Does she seem kind and understanding? Does she seem like she makes fun of or judges other people? You've probably observed lots of things about her that will give you an idea if she would be kind to someone with social anxiety or if she'd be a jerk.

 

[Baguette]

I'm pretty poor with social cues but I try my best, she's quite an outgoing person but she seems pretty kind. I've just got to work up a bit of courage

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I'd never be brave enough to do this ngl. Good luck bro.

 

[Baguette]

Yeah, she's not interested, I got rejected. I expected this anyway just thought I may as well try it before I ctb. Don't blame her.

 

[Thinking]

My only concern would be if she rejects you and you ctb soon after, she might blame herself for you choosing to ctb. I'm someone who always feels guilty tho, so maybe I'm being irrational

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Yeah, she's not interested, I got rejected. I expected this anyway just thought I may as well try it before I ctb. Don't blame her.

First off, congrats on working up the courage!

Secondly, it sounds as if there are life experiences which you are still interested in having. What if she was interested and a positive relationship resulted? Would you still want to ctb or would your perspective have changed? Just curious, as maybe this possibility still exists with someone else.

 

[iDieUDie80]

Yeah, she's not interested, I got rejected. I expected this anyway just thought I may as well try it before I ctb. Don't blame her.

So damn proud of you for mustering up that courage. I never had the confidence to ask out any of the girls I liked growing up (I have intense anxiety and OCD). I know you're strong and I bet you're stronger than you think.

 

[Worndown]

Yeah, she's not interested, I got rejected. I expected this anyway just thought I may as well try it before I ctb. Don't blame her.

Sorry.

 

[Lostandfound7]

Sorry.

Her rejection might have NOTHING to do with u, love..Maybe she doesn't wanna date right now..

Kudos to u for stepping out! That's HUGE! So proud of u!♡♡♡