Venting O adding machine

[lachrymost]

A risk I am comfortable with taking:
I die today. If I hadn't, tomorrow would have somehow reversed all my pain. Against the odds, everything I went through would have ultimately been worth it. I miss out on this immense boon and instead never feel happiness again. (Notably in this scenario, I don't suffer over this.)

A risk I am not comfortable with taking:
I live day after day like a good soldier. I end up on my death bed after decades of misery. I was right all along about what life had in store for me, but there is no satisfaction in being right about this--only despair and anger. Everyone I love is long dead and I have to face my humiliating defeat alone, knowing that my fellow humans were too hubristic and cruel to see what I really needed. (Notably in this scenario, I suffer ineffably.)

Why am I forced to gamble everyday with the later possibility when I'm not comfortable with the risk, and the risk is all mine? Why, when there's an alternate option with a different risk that is vastly more acceptable to me? What gives my fellow humans the right to do this to me and those like me? I'm aghast at the face of humanity.

 

[Aries]

❤

 

[lachrymost]

A lot of people think the suicidal delusionally believe it's impossible they'll find a will to live again. They think we all see no possibility of happiness ever because of our "disease". I like this argument because it demonstrates that, for many of us, that's not the point at all.