2
224
Member
- Oct 14, 2020
- 31
Does anyone else feel like they aren't good enough to ctb. My brain tells myself that I am faking it or being over dramatic with my depression and suicidal attempts because their r times in the day that I am ok. I mean every day I contemplait ctb. The reasons I have to ctb is my anxiety is so so severe that I just want my brain to stop and be at peace. I don't want my brain to be running 100mph everyday it is so exhausting. I suffer from ptsd from verbal, physical, and sexual abuse from family members. My mom tells me to ctb and is beyond toxic to me and I live with her so I can't do it anymore. I hate society and find this world to be way too cruel to stay in and all around I just want to leave. I am not having fun. I am always stressed and I absolutely hate myself. So I have reasons to ctb but my brain tells me I am not enough to be depressed or not enough to be suicidal. But I think thats also bc I do not know life without mental illness and I just think being this upset is normal until I talk to someone who does not suffer from mental illness. I guess its just my anxiety always judging me. Does anyone else have this problem?