Venting No want talk no want any

[CTB Dream]

Fk all species ape callous ,fk all not want Stay thus lifd this species fk all ,now come scum atk fk all fk all, see injury damage wat hpn worse all cuz this retard species fk all ,yea no want talk any even here all ppl mnstr no want talk fk u species, scum brainle.

 

[LoiteringClouds]

Fk all species ape callous ,fk all not want Stay thus lifd this species fk all ,now come scum atk fk all fk all, see injury damage wat hpn worse all cuz this retard species fk all ,yea no want talk any even here all ppl mnstr no want talk fk u species, scum brainle.

Hello @CTB Dream,

I'm not sure if I'm allowed to post here, as you said "no want talk any even here all ppl mnstr no want talk fk u species, scum brainle."
So you don't have to reply to me. I just feel like it's time to repent. And if you find my post is insensitive, please kindly let me know.

Sometimes I feel like I'm a callous fiend who push people into CTBing. I would say "the choice between to be or not to be is solely up to you," but some people, especially people outside this forum might think, "You don't try to stop suicide therefore you're a callous fiend who love to watch people die." I think, there actually are people, especially "normies," who want to be stopped taking their life and feel invalidated when you don't try to stop them taking their lives. They might think, "I'm actually worthless because you don't try to save my life."
At the same time, if I said "It's not your time to CTB because you are young/talented/good person/important to me etc.,"some people, especially people on this forum, might think "You doesn't try to understand how I feel hopeless, therefore you're a callous fiend who love to watch people being tortured."

I'm guilty of "original sin" - Though it has been against my wish, but I've hurt many people. I've got benefited from other people's suffering. And I might be morally bad because I don't try to impose "God's rules and orders" or anything like that on others. But I'd take the blame - I've been sometimes wrong and I should make amends to people who I've hurt. I think this is a part of "suffering together" - the original meaning of the word compassion - and when you act on compassion and get punished (or go through other forms of suffering,) I think you're doing right - this is called bravery - and one of the most famous example is Jesus (I know some people disagree.)

I feel like I'm a hypocrite. I know I'm not Jesus. So I'm ready to get punished. I'm ready to make amends. Because I wish I were a compassionate friend, not a callous fiend.

I'm deeply grateful to you for reading this wall of runes I wrote
@CTB Dream, I wish you the best and if your suffering is genuinely inevitable and you want to suffer with you, I'll appreciate it, and if not, I understand - you don't deserve this torture.

Love,
LoiteringClouds

 

[FuneralCry]

Humans certainly are the worst species to me, it's horrible how they create so much suffering in this hellish reality, I see existence itself as truly being such a dreadful mistake.

 

[ever so lonely]

very difficult to disagree with this post, boy did it strike a chord, i rly resonate with this post, where there is people there is often trouble, drama, disappointment, and let downs, violence, wars, death, destruction, genocide, rape, and on and on, here is the only community i have ever felt included or a part of, i mean i get this, you want to distance yourself but at the same time to do so more or less makes life pointless and meaningless, i feel for you ctb dream , your always here and always going thru shit, i feel for you, life never throws you a bone, so to speak, i just wished i could offer more sound advice than this, take care people and dont let these bastards drag you down, often that is exactly there intention, dont play there silly mind games, or better yet stay well away, maybe it is for the best in the long run, peace and blessings to everybody here in perpetual suffering, may we each find our own inner peace someway, somehow, x

 

[Daxter_87]

It's the only place you have, yet these delusional, selfish and evil fools want to take it away from you. And, even if they succeeded, would they then do anything to improve your circumstances? Would they also take away your disability? Would they cure you? Would they do anything for you at all? I don't think so, they don't care about vulnerable people in pain like you. They wouldn't do a damn thing for you, they would just leave you there, alone and broken, without having access to the only website that ever gave you comfort and understanding (even if only slightly).

No wonder you don't even want to talk here, humanity has undoubtedly earned your total distrust and hatred. We don't deserve the kindness of such a tender and warmhearted soul.

 

[noname223]

It's the only place you have, yet these delusional, selfish and evil fools want to take it away from you. And, even if they succeeded, would they then do anything to improve your circumstances? Would they also take away your disability? Would they cure you? Would they do anything for you at all? I don't think so, they don't care about vulnerable people in pain like you. They wouldn't do a damn thing for you, they would just leave you there, alone and broken, without having access to the only website that ever gave you comfort and understanding (even if only slightly).

No wonder you don't even want to talk here, humanity has undoubtedly earned your total distrust and hatred. We don't deserve the kindness of such a tender and warmhearted soul.

As far as I understood it the problem was not that ctbdream should not be on here. She often emphasized that all suicide methods are not possible for her anyway. From what I have understood the following was an allegation: she would fake her illness which is completely ridiculous. CTB dream is one of the most wholehearted, good and genuine member in this forum. I could not ever imagine to question that. I think she is completely innocent in so many instances. It is completely obvious for anyone that she is not faking it. There are not even any serious hints that she would fake it. Going against CTBDream is pretty evil because her life is already such a nightmare for her. She deserves a so much better life. She does not need to be traumatized even further. It is no wonder that her trust in humankind is gone. After all what happened this is a completely natural reaction.

 

[Daxter_87]

As far as I understood it the problem was not that ctbdream should not be on here. She often emphasized that all suicide methods are not possible for her anyway. From what I have understood the following was an allegation: she would fake her illness which is completely ridiculous. CTB dream is one of the most wholehearted, good and genuine member in this forum. I could not ever imagine to question that. I think she is completely innocent in so many instances. It is completely obvious for anyone that she is not faking it. There are not even any serious hints that she would fake it. Going against CTBDream is pretty evil because her life is already such a nightmare for her. She deserves a so much better life. She does not need to be traumatized even further. It is no wonder that her trust in humankind is gone. After all what happened this is a completely natural reaction.

I'm not sure what you mean. Are you suggesting that I said that CTB Dream is faking her disability? Or are you referring to the people who want to shut down this place? If it's the first option, I've never claimed such a thing. I'm fully aware of her disability; it is pretty damn obvious just from the way she writes (no offence please, I'm simply pointing out that she struggles a lot to write). I know that she suffers from a brain injury that prevents her from doing basically anything.

Besides, I too think that she is one of the best members on this forum by far. She is very kind, compassionate, sweet and lovely. Also, as far as I know, she is very smart and versed in quite a few areas, such as drawing, writing and science. It really is an awful shame that a person this fond and talented ended up with such a crippling disability. Of all the people in this world, she is one of the least deserving of that cruel punishment.

So no, I didn't said that she is fake at all, and I really, really apologize if my comment was ambiguous and led to misinterpretations. English is not my native language, so I might use certain words or expressions inaccurately.

 

[CTB Dream]

No wry undrstd all

 

[noname223]

I'm not sure what you mean. Are you suggesting that I said that CTB Dream is faking her disability? Or are you referring to the people who want to shut down this place? If it's the first option, I've never claimed such a thing. I'm fully aware of her disability; it is pretty damn obvious just from the way she writes (no offence please, I'm simply pointing out that she struggles a lot to write). I know that she suffers from a brain injury that prevents her from doing basically anything.

Besides, I too think that she is one of the best members on this forum by far. She is very kind, compassionate, sweet and lovely. Also, as far as I know, she is very smart and versed in quite a few areas, such as drawing, writing and science. It really is an awful shame that a person this fond and talented ended up with such a crippling disability. Of all the people in this world, she is one of the least deserving of that cruel punishment.

So no, I didn't said that she is fake at all, and I really, really apologize if my comment was ambiguous and led to misinterpretations. English is not my native language, so I might use certain words or expressions inaccurately.

No I did not accuse you of doing that. I rather meant the people who attacked CTB Dream.

 

[Shaylla1998]

We find ourselves in this space, existing together as if we have won the lottery of misfortune that brought us here.