Help New Member Here. Scared

[harvardreject]

Um ….. hi,

My name is Lili. I finally decided to sign up for a place more open to suicide. I delayed my suicide plan for a year to give someone a chance at helping me. That person left me without saying a word. It's been 6 weeks or so now.

I have been abandoned by so many people and have failed so many treatment. Now trying anything. Talking to anyone is scary to me. But I need to get through the day. I cannot succeed in killing myself here.

So if anyone here have some time, please help me out. I cannot do anything but be scared but …. I need help. I know I have to kill myself, I know there's almost no chance for me to get better ….. but I'm so scared, cause I have a passion, and I love it so much. I hope someone can help me work things out and give me some warmth if possible. Thank you

 

[Hans Voralberg]

Hi Lili nice to meet you. I was new here also and also was scared but people here are very open and friendly. I can talk with you if you want. I'm 22 years old from central Europe. I'm also very anxious in real world, constant fear is the worst. I'm here for you.

 

[FuneralCry]

Welcome. I'm sorry you have been abandoned by others, nobody should be treated like that. Some people are just so cruel. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.

 

[Hans Voralberg]

Best about this place is that this forum gives you many ways to deal with your problems. We have recovery section. In this section you find evrything about recovery from suicidal thoughts and ideation you can talk with people about their struggle, or ask a question about it. We have also suicide discusion in this section you find sources to methods of CTB and discussion about suicide in general. Warning reading this part of forum can be very emotionally draining, using with care. Offtopic is the best especially music and art section, they are my favorite ones. I'm here for you to talk with you, answer your questions and just listen to you at first place. What is your passion if I may ask Lili?

 

[obliviousatbest]

I'm sorry life have led you this morbid place but I'm hoping you find the community you need here, and people that really understand you rather than running away from the bleak truths of being. Wishing you peace Lili

 

[sandalphon]

Avoid this section of the site. There is a feature that hides the Suicide Discussion forum.

You want to become better. Do not read the threads here. I only do so because I know I can handle it, no plans on CTB any time soon.

 

[Hans Voralberg]

Definitely I agree with sandalphon you should hide suicidal discussion and keep only recovery section and Oftopic.Reading suicide section can be very hard and damaging for your psyche and accelerate the proces of CTB in my opinion.

Avoid this section of the site. There is a feature that hides the Suicide Discussion forum.

You want to become better. Do not read the threads here. I only do so because I know I can handle it, no plans on CTB any time soon.

 

[CC123]

"I have a passion, and I love it so much. I hope someone can help me work things out and give me some warmth"

Maybe play the counting game or word games and get a sufficient number of posts so that members can DM you
there are many wonderful people in the recovery area

it is not easy to reach out and ask for help -- it took real courage for you to take this step

best wishes

 

[Kobusu]

Hey friend. It can be difficult, being abandoned by the ones you love, I think we can all relate to an extent. If you have a passion, all I can suggest is you latch onto it and don't let go. Telling people in general is difficult, so the fact that's you've managed to is something you should be proud of. You're among people that care, and every day you should congratulate yourself for making it through. You're not going through this alone.

 

[Lost Magic]

Welcome to the forum. I am sure you will find a lot of love and warmth here my friend. I know I have.

 

[harvardreject]

Definitely I agree with sandalphon you should hide suicidal discussion and keep only recovery section and Oftopic.Reading suicide section can be very hard and damaging for your psyche and accelerate the proces of CTB in my opinion.

The thing is …. I want to recover but I don't think I can. It's a long story. I don't want to tell it because I don't want to be mocked or abandoned again

Best about this place is that this forum gives you many ways to deal with your problems. We have recovery section. In this section you find evrything about recovery from suicidal thoughts and ideation you can talk with people about their struggle, or ask a question about it. We have also suicide discusion in this section you find sources to methods of CTB and discussion about suicide in general. Warning reading this part of forum can be very emotionally draining, using with care. Offtopic is the best especially music and art section, they are my favorite ones. I'm here for you to talk with you, answer your questions and just listen to you at first place. What is your passion if I may ask Lili?

Learning every academic discipline possible. And use such experiences to encourage others to seek out the academics at an outlet to experience life. It's ironic. I have been succeeding at this passion. Recently I became a Stanford research assistant. I'm a pretty rare member in this community, as my mental illness does not appear to have much impact on my career. I have a net worth at just 16 & leave high school w a job offer. But none of that could ever get me care

 

[8evergo]

we are family

 

[harvardreject]

I'm sorry I cannot reply to everyone, or read what everyone has written. I can't forget those moments where i was abandoned. My parents lost a child 6 years ago (my older sister), and they still chose to abandon me & mock me. I stayed back for a year because someone wanted to adopt me and raised me as their own. 3 weeks ago that person left without saying a word. I got sick, everyday I just want to throw up, my head has been spinning and yesterday I hallucinated for the first time. I told that person to come back but they never replied. I tried to say something to one of you but after a few sentences my hands start shaking and i start wheezing and crying

Um ….. hi,

My name is Lili. I finally decided to sign up for a place more open to suicide. I delayed my suicide plan for a year to give someone a chance at helping me. That person left me without saying a word. It's been 6 weeks or so now.

I have been abandoned by so many people and have failed so many treatment. Now trying anything. Talking to anyone is scary to me. But I need to get through the day. I cannot succeed in killing myself here.

So if anyone here have some time, please help me out. I cannot do anything but be scared but …. I need help. I know I have to kill myself, I know there's almost no chance for me to get better ….. but I'm so scared, cause I have a passion, and I love it so much. I hope someone can help me work things out and give me some warmth if possible. Thank you

 

[Lost Magic]

The thing is …. I want to recover but I don't think I can. It's a long story. I don't want to tell it because I don't want to be mocked or abandoned again

Learning every academic discipline possible. And use such experiences to encourage others to seek out the academics at an outlet to experience life. It's ironic. I have been succeeding at this passion. Recently I became a Stanford research assistant. I'm a pretty rare member in this community, as my mental illness does not appear to have much impact on my career. I have a net worth at just 16 & leave high school w a job offer. But none of that could ever get me care

Best place for you to be on the site would be the recovery section: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/forums/recovery.7/

 

[harvardreject]

Best place for you to be on the site would be the recovery section: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/forums/recovery.7/

i …. um …. i don't know. i'm even scared i would get banned for saying this. there was someone who was unlike any other. for a while they made me believe that i could recover. i started taking jobs & accumulating savings again. then 6 weeks ago, they left, never saying anything to me again. idk why. idk what was wrong. it was probably me but idk how to fix it

 

[Hans Voralberg]

.Lili you are very unique person(probably you heard that a lot). I truly believe you can recover. Don't worry about being banned you just need stick to the rules of forum and not force your point of view into others users just it. We are here for you. We are just troubled souls gather together at this site and support each other.

 

[CC123]

i …. um …. i don't know. i'm even scared i would get banned for saying this. there was someone who was unlike any other. for a while they made me believe that i could recover. i started taking jobs & accumulating savings again. then 6 weeks ago, they left, never saying anything to me again. idk why. idk what was wrong. it was probably me but idk how to fix it

Their problem, not yours.
Easy to take on the problems of others when they act so rudely.
Sounds like a person to avoid in the long run.
Be glad they showed their true colors early on.