never content

[bepop:$$]

I have a lot of friends. I am constantly surrounded by people at school. The issue is it doesn't matter to me. I wish they would leave me alone. It takes so much energy to put up an act everyday. I am sad and I have been sad for a long time. In middle school I used to be a loser who got ridiculed daily. I didn't fully realize how much my classmates hated me until I had changed. I decided I'm not going to be that weird kid anymore so now I hangout with the popular kids. But even though I achieved my goal nothing has changed for me. I'm still sad even with all these people around me. I feel like i don't belong in the friend group. I don't belong with the popular friend group but every day i put on my front and try to make myself as likeable as possible. I'm drained.

 

[Catlove]

Introverts generally have a hard time socialising, when I try to socialise it drains my mental battery faster than anything lol. Sometimes it's better to cut ties with people who bring you down intentionally or not. If you have a really close friend it'll be much easier to do so and I promise it'll be worth it in the long run.

 

[bepop:$$]

I have a lot of friends. I am constantly surrounded by people at school. The issue is it doesn't matter to me. I wish they would leave me alone. It takes so much energy to put up an act everyday. I am sad and I have been sad for a long time. In middle school I used to be a loser who got ridiculed daily. I didn't fully realize how much my classmates hated me until I had changed. I decided I'm not going to be that weird kid anymore so now I hangout with the popular kids. But even though I achieved my goal nothing has changed for me. I'm still sad even with all these people around me. I feel like i don't belong in the friend group. I don't belong with the popular friend group but every day i put on my front and try to make myself as likeable as possible. I'm drained.

Introverts generally have a hard time socialising, when I try to socialise it drains my mental battery faster than anything lol. Sometimes it's better to cut ties with people who bring you down intentionally or not. If you have a really close friend it'll be much easier to do so and I promise it'll be worth it in the long run.

The only reason I haven't cut half of them off is because I tell myself I worked so hard to change who I was to get here and I don't want to throw all my efforts away and go back to who I was. Either way I was sad. I don't know how to change that.

 

[Catlove]

The only reason I haven't cut half of them off is because I tell myself I worked so hard to change who I was to get here and I don't want to throw all my efforts away and go back to who I was. Either way I was sad. I don't know how to change that.

Sometimes growing means realising you were better off before you did something. It is hard knowing that the solution to your problems didn't work, but when you realise that you open yourself to new ways that you didn't ever think about. I believe this realisation is what you need most atm.

 

[bepop:$$]

Thank you I hope I will have the courage one day

 

[Catlove]

Thank you I hope I will have the courage one day

I hope you will too. You seem like a good person. I wish you nothing but the best!