Never again will I make myself vulnerable to man or anyone

[FireFox]

I have sensitive, soft, nurturing, vunlerable side which I didn't know existed until the older man I fell deeply in love with brought it out. All my life I went through suppressing my emotions and maintaining this image as the good model daughter and sister that is all everyone saw.

In my encounters with him I was so open to him in a way I never have been with anyone else and he always reciprocated with kindness and was so comforting .I felt so safe with him how wrong I was. Knowing how vulnerable I was he ended up humiliating me in the workplace and also another older woman work colleague ( 40s) I thought was a friend joined in with him in humiliating me

I fell in love with a 55 year old man baby who turned out to be a two faced coward and not the kind guy I thought he was. By the time I realised what he is it was too late. When I told him I loved him, accepted his relationship which he failed to disclose to me and wished him well. I asked him if this going to be a problem because I wanted work relations between us to be civil and great, i tried to make work relations good between us. He told me I had "nothing to worry about" and "were good". The lying POS goes to our boss and whines about how I make feel "uncomfortable" at work because I told him I loved him yep these were my boss exact words and kept lying about me. My woman work friend who knew what was happening between the man and myself after promising me she wouldn't say anything to anyone she went to the man and revealed our private conversations, I had to find out from another employee. The workplace management kept pampering him, codling him and he hid behind the management to humiliate me at work. In office he kept staring at me as if I was a stranger, treated me like a pariah and couldn't have the courage to be honest. He controlled the narrative and management saw me as an irresponsible "immature" 25 year old young woman besotted with an older man and i got blamed for everything. The meeting with management was so humiliating, embrassing and I felt so exposed by the end of meeting.

He has caused me so deep pain along with my work friend who i was always good to at work and provided assistance with her cases when she needed help. Never again will I make myself vulnerable to a man.

 

[Sulyya]

Many people are so thoughtless. Even if it's someone attempting to do what they think is the right thing. I'm sorry this happened to you.

 

[FuneralCry]

The reality is that you just cannot trust and rely on people in this cruel world, it's awful how humans just create so much harm but unfortunately we do exist in a world where people suffer all through no fault of their own.

 

[Ceterum]

there is the saying "don't f** the company". In a way, this is why, since trouble there might sperad farther and affect the entirety of your life.
I've been in the same boat.

 

[darkangel44]

It must be really brutal, i am sorry. Text me if you need to talk it out!

 

[SewerRat]

Thats all disgusting on their part, I'm so sorry. Nothing hurts more than for once feeling like you can open up about everything you've been holding in, only for it to just mean nothing to the person you're telling, even worse that they humiliated you for it. I'm so sorry.

 

[CantWait2D1E]

Yes I too think it is best to forgo attraction to the other sex. Nothing good has come of it thus far and I doubt it ever will.

I for one am tired of feeling I like women who would never even give me the time of day. Or wanting to talk to other men I see regularly that probably don't even notice me.

It sickens me that I feel this way and is probably the main reason I want to CTB. I'm like a prisoner in my own mind.

 

[FireFox]

there is the saying "don't f** the company". In a way, this is why, since trouble there might sperad farther and affect the entirety of your life.
I've been in the same boat.

@Ceterum What makes me so angry about the whole thing is as a young adult we get criticised all the time by older people for not behaving properly but my work colleagues who are older than me are playing games in the workplace, gossiping etc. Seeing that man and woman work colleague friend playing a role in humiliating me at work as been the worst thing I experienced in my job. The job was difficult enough already

I feel so betrayed that he couldn't sit down and be honest with me instead lies to me constantly then goes to our boss to tell more lies and not give the full story in which he pursued me first. I feel so betrayed and hurt as all I ever shown that man was kindness, been a supportive work colleague.

• When he was spending Christmas alone all by himself and feeling upset about it I sent him a Christmas card which I took time writing as I write special thoughtful messages on cards to people I send them to.

•He was so upset over the death of his father which was why he was not looking forward to Christmas and I shared with him the loss of my own grandfather who died during the Christmas season. I never shared that with anyone and went through the past years not acknowledging my own grief.

I was attracted to him because I thought because he was older he would be more mature and have less baggage especially that the fact he has never married and has no children. It turned out he has been on/off with his older gf in her 50s too for over 20 years. How the hell can a person be in a relationship with someone on/off for 20 years. I scrutinised him over this as i caught him in his lack of honesty about his relationship status. When they broke up that when he gave me all the time in the world and he distanced himself from me when he got back with her. He couldn't cope with my questioning and interrogating. All this happened before he humiliated me to the workplace.

Being betrayed by older work colleagues who should know better has been the worst. I always thought people this age group behaved themselves. The woman work colleague friend is a mother to 2 daughters my age group.

Thats all disgusting on their part, I'm so sorry. Nothing hurts more than for once feeling like you can open up about everything you've been holding in, only for it to just mean nothing to the person you're telling, even worse that they humiliated you for it. I'm so sorry.

@SewerRat If I was a piece of shit person then I can say to myself that "I deserved the workplace humiliation" but I have been nothing but kind to that man. I was so love with him all I cared about was being a good woman for him even though I didn't know how to be due to the fact I never had a relationship and still a virgin in my adult age.

• When he was spending Christmas alone all by himself and feeling upset about it I sent him a Christmas card which I took time writing as I write special thoughtful messages on cards to people I send them to.

•He was so upset over the death of his father which was why he was not looking forward to Christmas and I shared with him the loss of my own grandfather who died during the Christmas season. I never shared that with anyone and went through the past years not acknowledging my own grief.

The way he stared at me in the office I felt like I saw the real him which he is nothing but a coward. I have never seen a man so pathetic. He is really tall and just looked at me as if I was a stranger, someone he never seen before and couldn't have the guts to be honest. The man was wearing a baggy jumper, tracksuit bottoms whereas I was wearing purple lipstick and a purple lacy dress. I looked at him as if he was pathetic and gave him a glare, dirty look. He was dressed as if he got out of bed and kept hiding behind the management. I now laugh off the situation even though I still feel deep pain over the fact I was stupid for believing I could have a future with a 55 year old man. The workplace management was babying and protecting him literally it was so embarrassing to witness. He is 55 years old.

 

[FireFox]

It must be really brutal, i am sorry. Text me if you need to talk it out!

@darkangel44 it was so brutal the workplace management treated me with pure contempt during the questioning process. In their eyes I was nothing but an irresponsible immature young woman who was besotted with an older man. They kept defending and protecting the man its was so disgusting. I ended up shouting at my boss

I never planned to shout at my boss all I wanted was to tell my side of the story and be respectful but he just kept attacking me.

The things my boss were saying were just awful

• " you weren't love with him. You are infatuated" He had this disgusted look on his face when he said it to me.

The final straw was when was when I explained the man never told me he was "uncomfortable" around me and constantly kept telling me how "we are good" and i have "nothing to worry about". I made the point the man should have been clear and honest. My boss proceeds to asks the most stupid unprofessional question ever "so wanted him to tell you to piss off? " He said it with pure contempt.

Then I processed to yell him because i was tired of the bullshit happening in the meeting. I screamed at my boss saying" he is 55 year he is the man he should have been talking control of the situation"

He was so furious. I have seen my boss angry before but not this angry. He was so mad. I was not even scared when I yelled at him.

 

[darkangel44]

@darkangel44 it was so brutal the workplace management treated me with pure contempt during the questioning process. In their eyes I was nothing but an irresponsible immature young woman who was besotted with an older man. They kept defending and protecting the man its was so disgusting. I ended up shouting at my boss

I never planned to shout at my boss all I wanted was to tell my side of the story and be respectful but he just kept attacking me.

The things my boss were saying were just awful

• " you weren't love with him. You are infatuated" He had this disgusted look on his face when he said it to me.

The final straw was when was when I explained the man never told me he was "uncomfortable" around me and constantly kept telling me how "we are good" and i have "nothing to worry about". I made the point the man should have been clear and honest. My boss proceeds to asks the most stupid unprofessional question ever "so wanted him to tell you to piss off? " He said it with pure contempt.

Then I processed to yell him because i was tired of the bullshit happening in the meeting. I screamed at my boss saying" he is 55 year he is the man he should have been talking control of the situation"

He was so furious. I have seen my boss angry before but not this angry. He was so mad. I was not even scared when I yelled at him.

I am so sorry to hear that, I have been in some similarly humiliating situation, and it felt bad for a week or something, and I felt embarrassed, even though it was totally not my fault. But then after a week I told myself to get over it, and hope you will be able too, because there are some shitty people, and always will be, but show them you are way better than them and you deserve that respect!