Venting Natural death of old age is terrifying

[underthedatetree]

people want to believe in movies where you re just weak but happily recounting your good memories in the hospital bed surrounded by your children grandchildren and fade away when youre done peacefully but its not like that. everyone who's not a child anymore (or even unfortunate children who witnessed old relative pass) knows how it's really like. yet we deny, or ignore, that terrifying end. even me, I don't want to describe it what I saw. but we all know. i wish I could just induce my heart attack now, instead of living to see my parents go through that.

 

[SmollMushroom]

Idk if I agree with that man...
Life has a strange way of making stuff like passing away not that ugly... Most of my elderly relatives died after some months of staying in bed, without being fully there, if you get what I mean. So they kinda left their body before dying, in a way.
One of them was even lucky enough to die in their sleep.
I don't think dying of old age is that bad. Not to mention in hospitals they fill you up with morphine and stuff, so that you basically feel no pain.

 

[todeswunsch]

Oh I never wanted to reach that stage. If I ever become old (the way its going its unprobable), I'll euthanize myself before getting to these later stages. This should be the norm but it still a taboo to even talk about.
You reach a point that's not life anymore, some transitional state.
I see my father taking care of my gradma that won't even recognize him anymore, and its so sad. At least she don't seem to perceive her suffering.
Its so scary to know that this will repeat with me and my father.

Good luck, be strong

 

[Meditation guide]

When my mother was in her last year she suffered terribly and what they did to her in the hospital here made it unbearable for her. I saw a brave woman who went through absolute hell before finally dying. A neighbor who had lung cancer went through hell for a year also. I won't describe it all but it was beyond anything I could have imagined for both of them.

 

[Krisis]

I don't think dying of old age is that bad.

Agreed. I used to be terrified of aging, but what alleviated that dread was the realization that It's the best way to go. In truth, it's a privilege.

 

[Yaffle]

I greatly fear old an age/ debilitating terminal illness death.

I also fear being locked in after a stroke or brain trauma hence my advance decision to refuse treatment other than pain killers.

 

[the_last_race]

It depends highly on your health. You may die in your sleep of a hearth attack at 65 - it would be just as natural as dying at 89 completely demented and immobile with no teeth and eyes.

 

[FuneralCry]

What terrifies me is the thought of existing for that long. To me getting older is just meaningless, undesirable suffering that is best avoided no matter what, I fear old age, in my case I personally believe the less time spent trapped in this cruel and futile existence the better.

 

[figurehead]

people want to believe in movies where you re just weak but happily recounting your good memories in the hospital bed surrounded by your children grandchildren and fade away when youre done peacefully but its not like that. everyone who's not a child anymore (or even unfortunate children who witnessed old relative pass) knows how it's really like. yet we deny, or ignore, that terrifying end. even me, I don't want to describe it what I saw. but we all know. i wish I could just induce my heart attack now, instead of living to see my parents go through that.

I believe (natural) death is scary no matter how/when it happens. My greatgran lived until she was 108, but she was lucid and fairly well physically. And I believe, above all, that she was happy like that. Being bipolar I feel like I'm running to/from death all the time. I'm 50 now, which is certainly quite a lot considering how young people seem to be here. First time I ran to death I was 18 and it's been me running to and from all this time. Do I feel terrified with the idea of dying of old age? As you can see, yes and know. When I'm depressed it's all I want, but when I'm well I try to elude it best I can.

 

[IsThisEverything]

Dying of old age in general doesn't scare me, but having dementia, which is becoming more common for the elderly, does. My grandpa had it and seeing what he suffered was harrowing. He was an intelligent, independent man before the dementia. It took everything from him. He didn't know who anyone was, he was having frightening hallucinations, he thought everyone was doing horrible things to him, he thought he'd been abandoned by his family, and he had no idea what was happening to him. When he was in the early stages, he became depressed and I am pretty sure he was hoping he would die before the dementia got too bad. The problem is, once it reaches a certain stage you're helpless to take your own life and left to suffer. It made him become violent and he ended up sectioned, but it was a natural reaction because he was so confused and scared. I was devastated when he died, but I was also relieved for him that his suffering was over. He was a smart, witty, active man and when he died he couldn't even speak his own name and thought he was completely alone.

 

[steppenwolf]

people want to believe in movies where you re just weak but happily recounting your good memories in the hospital bed surrounded by your children grandchildren and fade away when youre done peacefully but its not like that. everyone who's not a child anymore (or even unfortunate children who witnessed old relative pass) knows how it's really like. yet we deny, or ignore, that terrifying end. even me, I don't want to describe it what I saw. but we all know. i wish I could just induce my heart attack now, instead of living to see my parents go through that.

I was raised by my grandfather, who was an old English publican who was very old-fashioned even when he was young. And when I was in my thirties I watched him starve himself to death in a hospital bed in his nineties, simply because having broken his hip he would not tolerate being pushed around in a wheelchair by young nurses in a convalescent home. It was like his last lesson to me, after the lessons of infancy and childhood. Meet Mr. tree. Meet Mr. squirrel. Meet Mr. piano. Meet Mr. bicycle. Now meet Mr. Death. His deathbed wisdom was delivered in his characteristically sardonic fashion; and basically amounted to that growing old and dying are 'absolutely terrible' and should be avoided. He left me with the final deadpan answer to everything: 'It's all bullshit,' then calmly folded his hands across his chest and settled down to his rest with a satisfied look on his face.

My estranged father, who was an alcoholic Ulster seaman, died in the street of a massive heart attack at the age of 52. I only found out myself 17 years later. So for heart attack you need to get heavily into rum and tobacco. Saturated animal fats and cocaine probably help too.

 

[lachrymost]

Death by suicide is often so painful and scary, but unless you're lucky enough to die instantly, you're going to have to experience the dying process anyway. Hopefully you're in palliative care getting the good drugs, but even then it can be horrible. It's almost like there should be a way to opt out of all that! Some secret third thing.

 

[ftm68_99]

I was raised by my grandfather, who was an old English publican who was very old-fashioned even when he was young. And when I was in my thirties I watched him starve himself to death in a hospital bed in his nineties, simply because having broken his hip he would not tolerate being pushed around in a wheelchair by young nurses in a convalescent home. It was like his last lesson to me, after the lessons of infancy and childhood. Meet Mr. tree. Meet Mr. squirrel. Meet Mr. piano. Meet Mr. bicycle. Now meet Mr. Death. His deathbed wisdom was delivered in his characteristically sardonic fashion; and basically amounted to that growing old and dying are 'absolutely terrible' and should be avoided. He left me with the final deadpan answer to everything: 'It's all bullshit,' then calmly folded his hands across his chest and settled down to his rest with a satisfied look on his face.

My estranged father, who was an alcoholic Ulster seaman, died in the street of a massive heart attack at the age of 52. I only found out myself 17 years later. So for heart attack you need to get heavily into rum and tobacco. Saturated animal fats and cocaine probably help too.

Thanks for your comments. I've thought of starving myself, but I've read that i can be more painful than dying of thirst. One becomes constipated, the stomach fills up with painful gases, and it takes quite a bit longer to die than if one is refusing any liquids.