Story My SS aniversary

[Mr2005]

I just realised I've been here exactly a year (a bit longer if anyone remembers my stint as Mr 2004) and it's time to call it a day. I hope something I've said has been of use to someone but I can't change the world and I can't change the past. Next year I'll be 34 and officially wasted half my life. I don't really want to die but I can't live to see that happen. 2020. Normal to those born post 2000, absurd to me. Where did it go? How did I let it happen? That's all my day consists of now. I'm going with sleeping pills and a bathtub, it either works or it doesn't. I'm too pathetic to go to the necessary lengths to find something else and too cautious of it failing. This is worth a shot. Fucking devastated and appalled it's come to this but there are worse ways to go. Just slip away in peace. Hopefully be reincarnated in 1986 and have to do it again and if not I won't give a shit anyway. There's things I like about life I'm not going to lie but it's not worth living with the trauma

 

[Elias]

There's things I like about life I'm not going to lie but it's not worth living with the trauma

Amen. May you find your peace, man. Can't exactly agree on the method but I'm no one to try to convince you at this stage.

 

[SinisterKid]

Aye, its strange how anniversaries and birthdays often make us ponder the past and consider the future.

I am sure you have added many posts of value to this place and it will be a worse forum for your absence. I hope, sincerely, that you can find the peace you seek. Safe travels my friend.

 

[Wayfaerer]

There's things I like about life I'm not going to lie but it's not worth living with the trauma

It's bizarre how I found the most to live for when I became suicidal than before. I guess when you are backed into a corner with no escape, you realize all that you had taken for granted.

 

[Mr2005]

That is strange. I'm just living for others now. If everyone did that the world would be a better place but they don't. Whilst there's things I like about life there's things I don't but I don't pretend that's why I'm here. However if I'm only carrying on in the hope I can make a difference it's probably futile

Aye, its strange how anniversaries and birthdays often make us ponder the past and consider the future.

I am sure you have added many posts of value to this place and it will be a worse forum for your absence. I hope, sincerely, that you can find the peace you seek. Safe travels my friend.

Your name betrays you you're a good guy and I feel more optimistic for humanity that good people are still out there. Just a shame we're here

 

[woxihuanni]

Yes, how weird 2020 sounds.

And to think I had something planned for 2021.

 

[gingerplum]

Sigh. I've been here on & off for almost a year, too. Some of the losses really hurt, like @About_to_Go and @TiredHorse; then there are people that may still be around but I can't be sure and I really miss them, like @Smilla.

You might wanna chase your sleeping pills with a couple drinks; the alcohol and the pills will potentiate the somnolent effects of one another. I do wish you well, Mr2005, but I will miss seeing you, too.

 

[RedAlert]

Is being on SS one of the things you like about life?