Method My plan for suicide

[TwoTenEightyEight]

Since I'm new to the forum I shall open up about my own situation a little. My chosen suicide method would be Exsanguination (death by bleeding out). My method is as follows (within 'spoiler tags'):

I will perform this act by tapping a sharpened, pointed knife through my carotid triangle in the hope I'll catch my common carotid artery. I also hope to twist in quick succession to prevent vasoconstriction. I will feel for my pulse point at the (right) carotid triangle then place some tack to seat the blade point at the correct spot, or at least at a spot of close enough proximity. The tack will prevent slipping as well as negate hesitation pain. I will hold the hand-towel wrapped blade with my left hand and tap the knifes handle with the right hand; a target depth of 2-3 cm. The knife will slide along the towel and the point will pierce my neck from the front. I aim to miss my esophagus and trachea, for what it'd be worth. The only pain I'd be willing tolerate, other than the suffering of Exsanguination, is the pain of carrying out the act fully and quickly with minimal hesitation.

It goes without saying that I'll need to work to get past the limit of survival instinct and this will take time. I am working on eliminating my usual dopamine hits such as junk food, games and alcohol (I have no chemical dependency). From there I'll focus only on the act and why I need to carry it out. If it helps I'll seek out any content that upsets me to increase the drive to suicide. I may look into exercising more as this will be painful after my last surgery; a reason as to why I'm in this state of mind anyway.

If the forum wishes to know my 'Why?' or reasons, there'd be nothing better for me to do than post my suicide note which I have already written. However, the note is rather heavy and was not written with diplomacy in mind. It will take a separate post and will take a strong composure and understanding from the community.

I will rest this post by saying there really is a difference between the reasoning for suicide and the drive to do it. I simply lack only the drive at the moment.

 

[rs929]

I vote for knowing the story.

 

[Thegoldenapples]

Are you sure you want to go this way? It's sounds painful and you could end up in a worse situation

 

[JipJopMop]

I didn't read the spoiler bit but death by bleeding, wow that is something I definitely don't want to do.

I want to escape pain, not cause more

 

[TwoTenEightyEight]

Are you sure you want to go this way? It's sounds painful and you could end up in a worse situation

Yes, I have come to terms with the fact this will imply pain/suffering, though I doubt it'd be to the degree of failing partial noosing/night-night. Once I tap in, I'm bleeding and given the common carotid and it's immediate branches are close to the heart, I'd bleed out relatively quick. The worse case scenario I have thought about is chipping bone; example being vertebrae, which is why I'd control the depth and angle of entry. Also, bone is harder than wood and wood is surprisingly hard.

I should also mention that I have days to bleed and be dead before suspicions arise. In my case, what are the "worse situations" you could think of and how to avert them while still using my method?

 

[booray]

I'm curious as to where you'll be doing this, and what, if any, precautions you'll be taking to minimize a bloody mess.

 

[Thegoldenapples]

Yes, I have come to terms with the fact this will imply pain/suffering, though I doubt it'd be to the degree of failing partial noosing/night-night. Once I tap in, I'm bleeding and given the common carotid and it's immediate branches are close to the heart, I'd bleed out relatively quick. The worse case scenario I have thought about is chipping bone; example being vertebrae, which is why I'd control the depth and angle of entry. Also, bone is harder than wood and wood is surprisingly hard.

I should also mention that I have days to bleed and be dead before suspicions arise. In my case, what are the "worse situations" you could think of and how to avert them while still using my method?

I thought if it doesn't succeed, you could be left paralysed, brain damage, nerve damage etc. have you looked into more peaceful methods? My brother accidentally cut into an artery when he was cutting a pumpkin and I've never seen anyone in so much pain.

 

[TwoTenEightyEight]

I thought if it doesn't succeed, you could be left paralysed, brain damage, nerve damage etc. have you looked into more peaceful methods? My brother accidentally cut into an artery when he was cutting a pumpkin and I've never seen anyone in so much pain.

If I can bleed out and be dead before I'm saved (I have the time) I needn't worry about the aforementioned issues. Any peaceful method implies the purchase of Illegal items (Guns; in my country) and procuring prescription drugs which is not going to happen. Partial/Night-night are far more risky than even my plan.

Do you have any ideas that don't involve guns, drugs or otherwise suspicious purchases?

I'm curious as to where you'll be doing this, and what, if any, precautions you'll be taking to minimize a bloody mess.

At my place in the living room or bathroom; I don't have many guests and they have always been appointed. No appointment, no get in.

It's going to be a bloody mess.

I want to escape pain, not cause more

I can only say that perhaps death is earned.

 

[Lucien]

Would anyone know what the chances of failure are with a method like this. And what's most likely to go wrong?

And is there any kind of resource as helpful as the megathreads on this topic?

 

[TwoTenEightyEight]

Would anyone know what the chances of failure are with a method like this. And what's most likely to go wrong?

And is there any kind of resource as helpful as the megathreads on this topic?

I'd like your question thoroughly answered too.

I can only imagine that the only failure state to my chosen method is being "saved"; I won't let that happen.

 

[ClairyFairy]

You've got no room at all for any mistakes. There's so many what ifs. And once you've cut your neck there's so much else that could go wrong. Worse case scenario you might get the wound infected, be alive and just have major trauma to that area. Dying is never the worse thing that can happen, not in my mind and there's a lot of major stuff there and arteries bounce around, they're not meant to be cut. You can only stop the skin from moving not what's underneath. This is a method I could totally go for but I think there's too many things that could go wrong

 

[TwoTenEightyEight]

You've got no room at all for any mistakes. There's so many what ifs. And once you've cut your neck there's so much else that could go wrong. Worse case scenario you might get the wound infected, be alive and just have major trauma to that area. Dying is never the worse thing that can happen, not in my mind and there's a lot of major stuff there and arteries bounce around, they're not meant to be cut. You can only stop the skin from moving not what's underneath. This is a method I could totally go for but I think there's too many things that could go wrong

Could I have a list of all these wrongs that could be? As long as I bleed out fast, I'll die. Infected wound? I'd be dead in minutes! Would a twisted knife point be enough to get around the "arteries bounce around" issue you speak of? I am trying to prepare mentally for the pain aspect, I know death is earned.

 

[kukukoko]

Kudos if you can pull it off. It's really one of the suicide methods where I can only imagine 2 states of mind to succeed: One is the iron will like the monk below who suicided as an act of protest and sat in meditation during the whole act and the other one is the guy from a gore video who had a psychotic episode and decapitated himself with a knife on a street in front of people.

I just think that the SI is much harder to overcome during that particular method than during the majority of other methods.

But it should be fast if you can execute it right. I think it would be easier if one would buy a new scalpel.

I had once a wood carving set with like 50 razor blades of different shape, I think you could find scalpel like tools without raising suspicion. But I wouldn't do it with a normal knife. It's just much easier to cut through flesh with a really thin and very sharp object. And a scalpel was made to do exactly what you want to do. It's also quite difficult to sharpen a knife properly so it's reaaaally sharp.

Anyway with right execution you're dead in 60-120secs, I wouldn't worry about infection: if you get treated for infection you'll probably be already on the way to the psych ward. Only not doing it right will have side effects.