My number one reason for ctb is insomnia.

[BlazingBob]

I have what's called idiopathic insomnia. It's fucking torture. Nothing helps.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I feel so bad for you. Sleep is so important. I struggle so much when I can't sleep. It must be so shit because I know they're reluctant to give out medication because of how addictive it is.

I find I pretty much always have to have stuff on in the background to stop my mind worrying. Usually rain sounds. But yeah, sonetimes even that doesn't help- usually when I need to get up early. I can't imagine what it's like to suffer constantly like that. I'm so sorry.

 

[mortuarymary]

That's why I take loads of sleeping pills a night.
me without sleep will be me in death.

 

[FuneralCry]

That must be so horrible what you are going through, it truly is so hellish how people have to suffer so much in this existence.

 

[LifeIsCrazyNemb]

I have what's called idiopathic insomnia. It's fucking torture. Nothing helps.

Hey
Hate insomnia, ive been using sleeping pills for more than 6 years. I cant live without it.
Even with strong sleeping pills you cant get over your insomnia?

 

[TheDruBo]

I have what's called idiopathic insomnia. It's fucking torture. Nothing helps.

Mirtazapine?

 

[UKscotty]

I spent years hooked on zopiclone to sleep and modafinil to wake up was absolutely nuts so I know how you feel.

 

[BlazingBob]

Mirtazapine?

Doesn't do a thing. I have 2 bottles sitting on my desk.

Hey
Hate insomnia, ive been using sleeping pills for more than 6 years. I cant live without it.
Even with strong sleeping pills you cant get over your insomnia?

Sleeping pills don't help. Benzos don't help. Weed doesn't help. A huge dose of Lyrica can get me to sleep for about an hour but that's about it. I take lorazepam for anxiety but it still doesn't help with the transition from wakefulness to sleep. Twenty years of this shit.

Really sorry to hear that as I've had bouts of insomnia for days and even weeks and it's just so scary where you have one day blending onto the next without a proper break on between.

Phenergan may help a little and it's even stronger if you combine it with bioperine tablets.

This has been going on for 20 years. Not that I need any permission, but I think it's a damn good reason to ctb. I also have severe RLS to deal with too. I'm working with doctors from one of the top universities in the world and they just don't have any answers.

That's why I take loads of sleeping pills a night.
me without sleep will be me in death.

In the past 20 years I've taken most commercially available sleep aids. Nothing helps anymore. The Drs and researchers I'm working with think it's a byproduct of my severe RLS but they ultimately just don't know. I think when I finally eat a bullet I'll still be awake. Sometimes I think I've died already and I'm in hell.

 

[RedHates]

ive had insomnia for as long as i can remember. i cant really do anything about it because melatonin and sleeping pills give me sleep paralysis. im constantly exhausted but sleep is my favorite thing in the world. i hope something changes for you soon and you can get decent sleep.

 

[KarmaBus]

Insomnia is truly hell. I struggled with a bad period of it years ago and ended up with an Ambien addiction. I hope the specialists are able to figure something out for you, it must be really frustrating to be dealing with that.

 

[BlazingBob]

Insomnia is truly hell. I struggled with a bad period of it years ago and ended up with an Ambien addiction. I hope the specialists are able to figure something out for you, it must be really frustrating to be dealing with that.

I also ended up with an ambien addiction years ago. I was taking them all day long. Unfortunately my current situation is hopeless. Insomnia is just one of many health problems I have, albeit the most destructive. I also have severe RLS, Parkinson's, two blown out shoulders that case me agonizing pain, a bone sticking out of my hand, and severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety, cptsd, ADHD. I'll be homeless soon. No kids, family, partner, friends. I'm sick of fighting a losing battle and having nothing worth fighting for anyway. At 51, I think given all the variables ctb is a very rational decision.

 

[FujoshiNeet]

I've absolutely been there. Feels like you're going insane after days and days of being awake. The only thing that helped was insane amounts of weed but then that became its own issue. Insomnia sucks, sorry op.

 

[hopeless08]

I also ended up with an ambien addiction years ago. I was taking them all day long. Unfortunately my current situation is hopeless. Insomnia is just one of many health problems I have, albeit the most destructive. I also have severe RLS, Parkinson's, two blown out shoulders that case me agonizing pain, a bone sticking out of my hand, and severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety, cptsd, ADHD. I'll be homeless soon. No kids, family, partner, friends. I'm sick of fighting a losing battle and having nothing worth fighting for anyway. At 51, I think given all the variables ctb is a very rational decision.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with so much.
I can't imagine all of those issues on top of each other, just one of those issues must be hell in itself.
You are very brave though, to have made it this far, it's admirable how strong you are. I truly hope you find peace one way or another.

 

[Jolene79]

I also ended up with an ambien addiction years ago. I was taking them all day long. Unfortunately my current situation is hopeless. Insomnia is just one of many health problems I have, albeit the most destructive. I also have severe RLS, Parkinson's, two blown out shoulders that case me agonizing pain, a bone sticking out of my hand, and severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety, cptsd, ADHD. I'll be homeless soon. No kids, family, partner, friends. I'm sick of fighting a losing battle and having nothing worth fighting for anyway. At 51, I think given all the variables ctb is a very rational decision.

There seems to be absolutely nothing at all to keep you fighting for life. It's truly hideous. I hope so much you find a peaceful way out of your suffering

 

[LifeIsCrazyNemb]

I also ended up with an ambien addiction years ago. I was taking them all day long. Unfortunately my current situation is hopeless. Insomnia is just one of many health problems I have, albeit the most destructive. I also have severe RLS, Parkinson's, two blown out shoulders that case me agonizing pain, a bone sticking out of my hand, and severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety, cptsd, ADHD. I'll be homeless soon. No kids, family, partner, friends. I'm sick of fighting a losing battle and having nothing worth fighting for anyway. At 51, I think given all the variables ctb is a very rational decision.

Sorry to hear that. Looks like real hell. Hope you find peace soon.

 

[Gonnerr]

Have you tried natural melatonin, i take 5mg every night from lifebrand combined with benzodiazepine ( 1mg or 2mg depending on the night and stress)

And i go to bed 1 hour before the time i really wants to fall asleep , that way i dont stress with the fact that i dont fall asleep quick.

I usually do fall asleep quick , less than 10 minutes, 90% of the time.

 

[GhostShell]

Insomnia is my worst fear. I developed it due to long covid, thankfully it was unbearable only for a week or so, now it is just sleep maintenance insomnia.

I wake up after 1-3 hours of sleep and can somewhat easily fall back asleep, I have extremely vivid dreams. It is more uncomfortable than anything as it actually gives me rest just not in a traditional 8 hours in a row but in a sleeping window of 7 sleep hours total in 9 hours.

But when I get a terrible night of sleep and get less than 6 hours I know I am in a world of hell. Nausea so severe I can barely think, shakes and shivers, migraine.

Also I have the inability to nap. No matter what, my body cannot nap at all.

I just take magnesium bisglycinate and melatonin in the evening and am thankful it is not worse for me. Taking quetiapine for almost 10 years ruined my ability to sleep for 4 years. Then I recovered but covid had other plans. The less drugs I take the better as the balance of my broken brain is too delicate to disturb.

 

[BlazingBob]

Have you tried natural melatonin, i take 5mg every night from lifebrand combined with benzodiazepine ( 1mg or 2mg depending on the night and stress)

And i go to bed 1 hour before the time i really wants to fall asleep , that way i dont stress with the fact that i dont fall asleep quick.

I usually do fall asleep quick , less than 10 minutes, 90% of the time.

Yes, melatonin and benzos don't even put a dent in it. The insidious thing about it is if I take certain things not only will it not help the insomnia but it will make my severe RLS even worse. My Dr is a professor of sleep medicine at one of the top medical schools on the planet. I'm also dealing with early onset Parkinson's and was just diagnosed with ME/CFS, both of which greatly impact sleep onset, quality, and duration. Insomnia is my top reason for ctb but far from the only one. I'm just waiting on my dogs but they're going downhill fast and once their gone I'm going to follow them. They're my only reason for living.

 

[Woolf]

Doesn't do a thing. I have 2 bottles sitting on my desk.

Sleeping pills don't help. Benzos don't help. Weed doesn't help. A huge dose of Lyrica can get me to sleep for about an hour but that's about it. I take lorazepam for anxiety but it still doesn't help with the transition from wakefulness to sleep. Twenty years of this shit.

This has been going on for 20 years. Not that I need any permission, but I think it's a damn good reason to ctb. I also have severe RLS to deal with too. I'm working with doctors from one of the top universities in the world and they just don't have any answers.

In the past 20 years I've taken most commercially available sleep aids. Nothing helps anymore. The Drs and researchers I'm working with think it's a byproduct of my severe RLS but they ultimately just don't know. I think when I finally eat a bullet I'll still be awake. Sometimes I think I've died already and I'm in hell.

"Like" is the wrong word. I need an emoji that indicates "I hear you, you are seen".

 

[BlazingBob]

Insomnia is my worst fear. I developed it due to long covid, thankfully it was unbearable only for a week or so, now it is just sleep maintenance insomnia.

I wake up after 1-3 hours of sleep and can somewhat easily fall back asleep, I have extremely vivid dreams. It is more uncomfortable than anything as it actually gives me rest just not in a traditional 8 hours in a row but in a sleeping window of 7 sleep hours total in 9 hours.

But when I get a terrible night of sleep and get less than 6 hours I know I am in a world of hell. Nausea so severe I can barely think, shakes and shivers, migraine.

Also I have the inability to nap. No matter what, my body cannot nap at all.

I just take magnesium bisglycinate and melatonin in the evening and am thankful it is not worse for me. Taking quetiapine for almost 10 years ruined my ability to sleep for 4 years. Then I recovered but covid had other plans. The less drugs I take the better as the balance of my broken brain is too delicate to disturb.

I'm lucky if I get 4 hours, and even that is extremely fragmented. I usually get 2 to 3 total. I can definitely relate to the nausea. I'm taking buprenorphine, lorazepam, and Lyrica. I truly envy the dead.

 

[lifeisbutadream]

"Like" is the wrong word. I need an emoji that indicates "I hear you, you are seen".

I agree, but on Android I usually can only do "Like". I especially dislike the emoji captioned "Awww". It makes it sound like I'm mocking the person.

Sleep is a big problem for me too.

That's what nembutol (N) was for, sleep, so they outlawed it.