My last goodbye....

[Lunaemoth]

Hello everyone,

I'm posting this thread because I've got about 9 hours until I take my SN. I'll be taking it at 9 pm EST, in a hotel room near my house. I am really so grateful that I found this site; before I found it I'd been planning an otc overdose, which is one of the worst methods, and one I've tried and failed before, more than once. Not only did I find a reliable method, I also found a community I could talk to, people who understood me. Everyone on this site is in so much pain, but everyone still finds the strength to listen and empathize with each other.

And this site is absolutely not pro suicide. I've seen users talk down others who clearly do not want to or are not ready to ctb, without dismissing their pain or trying to take away their choice. I know that if I had changed my mind I could have talked about it on here without anyone looking down on me or trying to talk me into it. I desperately needed this safe place to talk and I'm so thankful to all of you.

So, moving on. For anyone wanting to know, I've been taking 20mg of primperan every eight hours for the last 2 days. I have another dose to take in about 20 minutes, and then my last dose will be 40mg at 8:20. I was worried about side effects, but had none. I'll also be taking 800mg of tagamet at 8, and some ibuprofen pm at some point between 8 and 9, then the SN at 9.

I'll be posting in this thread throughout the day, and I'll probably be in the chat as well later. Once again, thanks so much to everyone.



Edit: fixed some typos

 

[15dec]

I'm glad that you found a good community here and felt understood. Thank you for sharing your regimen (though there's a typo and it says 'property' instead of primperam). I don't be on when you actually take the sn but I wish you a safe journey and I hope you find the peace you've been looking for. Hugs

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Have a safe and peaceful journey to the other side. Good luck! <3

 

[Jen Erik]

Wish you the best.

 

[Circles]

I hope you find peace you seek and may the other side treat you more kindly and wash all your worries away. We'll be here for you if you need it.

 

[Xerxes]

Thanks for all you have contributed to this community! Have a peaceful journey and sleep eternal.

 

[Johnnythefox]

Be safe, adios.

 

[wanttodie]

hope it is quick and painless . im hopping to end my life soon to

 

[YellowJasmine]

I hope you'll be safe - either way whatever happens.

Best wishes to you!

 

[Lunaemoth]

I'm actually going to go sooner than I intended... In the next couple of hours

 

[Pegasus]

I'm actually going to go sooner than I intended... In the next couple of hours

Good Luck.

 

[Dead Meat]

I wish you all the best and a incredibly peaceful exit. May you find eternal peace .

 

[therhydler]

I hope it is peaceful, lots of hugs

 

[Retched]

I hope you find the peace you seek.

 

[Smilla]

Have a great trip, and good weather.

 

[Final Escape]

Hope you have a safe and easy passing. Goodbye, and hugs :)

 

[MistakesHappen]

Everyone on this site is in so much pain, but everyone still finds the strength to listen and empathize with each other.

Really love this quote.

I hope you find what you want, safe journey fellow friend.

 

[MistakesHappen]

.

 

[Ch92921]

I'm actually going to go sooner than I intended... In the next couple of hours

Shall you find your peace.

 

[Philip]

Please have a peaceful trip

 

[Kuba]

Take peace bro
We will miss you

 

[JustAboutDone]

Wishing you love, peace and tranquility as you cross over xxx See you on the other side and save us all a place on the comfiest sofa xxx

From A Winter's Tale:

"...when you do dance, I wish you
A wave o' the sea, that you might ever do
Nothing but that; move still, still so,
And own no other function: each your doing,
So singular in each particular,
Crowns what you are doing in the present deed,
That all your acts are queens."

 

[Haze]

Lunaemoth was sweet enough to share her last moments with us in the chat.

Here's what happened physically:

4:30 EST took 20 mg SN
4:40 EST feeling dizzy
4:41 EST increased heart rate
4:43 EST overheated, but hands feel like ice, a little shaky
4:44 EST heart is 'loud'
4:48 EST Got up to look in mirror, pale, almost blacked out, felt queasy
4:49 EST laying down, feels better
4:51 EST "I'm going to sleep... thanks everyone... goodbye I hope"

 

[JustAboutDone]

Lunaemoth was sweet enough to share her last moments with us in the chat.

Here's what happened physically:

4:30 EST took 20 mg SN
4:40 EST feeling dizzy
4:41 EST increased heart rate
4:43 EST overheated, but hands feel like ice, a little shaky
4:44 EST heart is 'loud'
4:48 EST Got up to look in mirror, pale, almost blacked out, felt queasy
4:49 EST laying down, feels better
4:51 EST "I'm going to sleep... thanks everyone... goodbye I hope"

Oh bless her. I hope it's quick and as painless as possible xxx

 

[SiArc]

I was hoping to be here for her. I hop you found the peace you deserve. I enjoyed chatting with you.

 

[nohoper]

such lovely words in the first post,hope you find peace .

 

[MistakesHappen]

Lunaemoth was sweet enough to share her last moments with us in the chat.

Here's what happened physically:

4:30 EST took 20 mg SN
4:40 EST feeling dizzy
4:41 EST increased heart rate
4:43 EST overheated, but hands feel like ice, a little shaky
4:44 EST heart is 'loud'
4:48 EST Got up to look in mirror, pale, almost blacked out, felt queasy
4:49 EST laying down, feels better
4:51 EST "I'm going to sleep... thanks everyone... goodbye I hope"

This is intense, hope it was peaceful and that she is in a place of peace.

 

[therhydler]

♡♡♡

 

[gingerplum]

Lunaemoth was sweet enough to share her last moments with us in the chat.

Here's what happened physically:

4:30 EST took 20 mg SN
4:40 EST feeling dizzy
4:41 EST increased heart rate
4:43 EST overheated, but hands feel like ice, a little shaky
4:44 EST heart is 'loud'
4:48 EST Got up to look in mirror, pale, almost blacked out, felt queasy
4:49 EST laying down, feels better
4:51 EST "I'm going to sleep... thanks everyone... goodbye I hope"

That is incredible to me that she had the presence of mind to discuss what she was feeling so calmly.

I just don't know if I would have the wherewithall for that.

I'm genuinely moved that she was so generously sharing her experience in her very last minutes.

 

[Jonjon]

Good luck my man, see you on the other side.

I'll prep the BBQ, you get the beer.