Venting My husband is inconsiderate

[SHThrowAway213]

He's really great., I wouldn't change him for the world apart from 2 things which really gets on my nerves.
He won't let me drink, and he won't let me die.
My thought process is if I can't actually kill myself is to try and drink myself to death.
What does he do?
Hide all the alcohol!
I posted here a couple days ago that I accidentally let him know about my plans. He's been very worried and keeps checking up on me and making sure I'm OK.
I appreciate it, but it's not what I need right now. What I need is for him to let me die, and for him to stop making me feel so fucking selfish.

 

[NextBusLeaving]

The hobnailed liver is a hellish way to go. Speaking from a family member of alcoholics.

 

[Worndown]

It can take years to drink yourself to death.
He is right on that one.

 

[LonelyLight]

The hobnailed liver is a hellish way to go. Speaking from a family member of alcoholics.

Yep I second this, also from experience, you don't wanna die a slow death like that

 

[NextBusLeaving]

You turn yellow and it gets worse from there. Hella expensive too.

 

[Sweet emotion]

The hobnailed liver is a hellish way to go. Speaking from a family member of alcoholics.

My father must have been lucky. He died of liver failure and hardly knew it.

He's really great., I wouldn't change him for the world apart from 2 things which really gets on my nerves.
He won't let me drink, and he won't let me die.
My thought process is if I can't actually kill myself is to try and drink myself to death.
What does he do?
Hide all the alcohol!
I posted here a couple days ago that I accidentally let him know about my plans. He's been very worried and keeps checking up on me and making sure I'm OK.
I appreciate it, but it's not what I need right now. What I need is for him to let me die, and for him to stop making me feel so fucking selfish.

It would take a very long time to drink yourself to death. My dad started at 13 and died at 51. And even though you hate it it's completely natural what your husband is doing. He loves you and doesn't want to lose you. I don't know how you let your death plans slip but I can imagine that now it's going to be very hard to get enough time alone to do anything. I'm really sorry about that. Don't feel selfish though. You're going through your own private hell. I don't feel selfish. I think it's selfish for people to want us to live when we are miserable and in pain every second of every mindute of every hour of every day of every month of every year. The problem is is that no one knows what it feels like so they can't imagine that dying would be better for us. There are plenty of people who I've said to myself in my head...it would be better off if they were dead. It's all about understanding the quality of life.

 

[LonelyLight]

My father must have been lucky. He died of liver failure and hardly knew it.

Very lucky, family member of mine died the same way, about 2-3 months of agony as their organs slowly shut down, all because of drink.

 

[Thanatonaut]

Like everyone else here, I advise against drinking yourself to death. I watched my mother do it, and it was pure misery. By the end, the whites of her eyes were yellow as a highlighter pen, and if you touched her skin it would start bleeding, like coming out of her pores. Varicose veins in her esophagus would rupture, leading to bouts of vomiting blood.

 

[helpfulfriendonwout]

Like everyone else here, I advise against drinking yourself to death. I watched my mother do it, and it was pure misery. By the end, the whites of her eyes were yellow as a highlighter pen, and if you touched her skin it would start bleeding, like coming out of her pores. Varicose veins in her esophagus would rupture, leading to bouts of vomiting blood.

That must have been traumatizing to witness, I can't imagine

 

[woxihuanni]

What an emotional abuser, not letting you drink yourself to death or otherwise kill yourself. I think you should call a domestic violence hotline. Probably he is a sociopath, you should watch some youtube videos on how to recover from sociopathic love.

 

[Jean4]

What an emotional abuser, not letting you drink yourself to death or otherwise kill yourself. I think you should call a domestic violence hotline. Probably he is a sociopath, you should watch some youtube videos on how to recover from sociopathic love.

Quote of the day :) I wish I had someone in my life you who cared that much about me.

 

[NextBusLeaving]

Quote of the day :) I wish I had someone in my life you who cared that much about me.

Samesies. My ex was like "i can tell youre not happy, so ill divorce you."

 

[Jean4]

Samesies. My ex was like "i can tell youre not happy, so ill divorce you."

Then you don't need your ex. It is sometimes better than being alone. You are worth more than that, and I am sorry that happened to you.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

I know drinking will takes ages to do and it's really painful, but at least I could maybe die quicker

 

[NextBusLeaving]

Then you don't need your ex. It is sometimes better than being alone. You are worth more than that, and I am sorry that happened to you.

But now i have nothing and im alone. Id love someone to talk to. :/

 

[Jean4]

But now i have nothing and im alone. Id love someone to talk to. :/

I am 51 never married. You have us. ;)

 

[Sweet emotion]

Very lucky, family member of mine died the same way, about 2-3 months of agony as their organs slowly shut down, all because of drink.

I'm sorry to hear that. When I was in the doctors office with my dad and they said he had six months or less to live....omg I can imagine what was going through my dad's mind. How do you process that? I was home with him the entire time since I had been sick as well. When the toxins from the liver started going to his brain he had to be out in the hospital. I just wanted God or whoever to take him because I couldn't stand seeing him so disoriented. But there was a little miracle that happened. One day he woke up and was sitting up and he knew who I was. He couldn't speak very well but my mom asked him if he knew me and he said yeah that's my little girl. That was kind of my goodbye.

 

[NextBusLeaving]

I am 51 never married. You have us. ;)

Ive been here ever since.

 

[Return2Dust]

My husband is a self-centered jerk. In fact, he thinks the universe revolves around him. He is his #1 fan. I can't wait to leave him behind. Not sure he'll notice. Work , his lover, will still be his constant companion.

 

[Sweet emotion]

I know drinking will takes ages to do and it's really painful, but at least I could maybe die quicker

How could you die quicker if drinking takes ages?

 

[SHThrowAway213]

How could you die quicker if drinking takes ages?

Even though drinking could take ages to fuck up my organs, I can still take a few years of my life

 

[Sweet emotion]

Even though drinking could take ages to fuck up my organs, I can still take a few years of my life

Im sorry I don't understand. Do you want to die soon or later? If you still want to live a lot of years then how are you suicidal?

 

[SHThrowAway213]

Im sorry I don't understand. Do you want to die soon or later? If you still want to live a lot of years then how are you suicidal?

I want to die soon, I'm planning another attempt, but if all of ny attempts fails I have drinking to speed up my death

 

[Moonicide]

I want to die soon, I'm planning another attempt, but if all of ny attempts fails I have drinking to speed up my death

You don't have to answer this, but may I ask why you're choosing to end your life?

 

[SHThrowAway213]

You don't have to answer this, but may I ask why you're choosing to end your life?

Mental illness since I was 12 and many incidents of sexual abuse when I was younger

 

[Sweet emotion]

I want to die soon, I'm planning another attempt, but if all of ny attempts fails I have drinking to speed up my death

But drinking isn't going to speed up your death. Don't you understand that? It's going to take decades. And don't you think your husband is going to be upset if you're drunk all the time for years and years and years? Im not trying to be rude but what you're saying isn't making any sense.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

But drinking isn't going to speed up your death. Don't you understand that? It's going to take decades. And don't you think your husband is going to be upset if you're drunk all the time for years and years and years? Im not trying to be rude but what you're saying isn't making any sense.

It may take decades but it will still be quicker then sitting around waiting to die at an old age

 

[SHThrowAway213]

But drinking isn't going to speed up your death. Don't you understand that? It's going to take decades. And don't you think your husband is going to be upset if you're drunk all the time for years and years and years? Im not trying to be rude but what you're saying isn't making any sense.

I honestly think this conversation is going to go nowhere and we should both go our seperate ways :)