Story My Experience at the Funeral Home

[nomoredolor]

I met with the funeral home director yesterday to prearrange my burial and storage/ transportation. I am being buried at a green cemetery so it's important that they know in advance that I cannot be embalmed.

The director was incredibly surprised at how young I was. I dressed semi nicely, giving the illusion that I have my shit together. I tried to have a calm and bubbly demeanor. I started by making a joke saying "hopefully your services won't be needed for a looooooooonnngggg time." And continuously we talked about how 40-50 years from now the prices will have changed and the home will have changed hands and all that jazz. We both agreed I would outlive him.

I was able to get a quote of just under $5000 USD if I were to die right now (not including plot which I already paid for and the service.) the meeting took an hour where we discussed if there would be a showing, refrigeration, notifying the grave digger, obituary fees, transportation logistics, shrouds vs coffins, mortuary trusts and so on. I provided my life insurance policy, birth certificate, social security number and some basic info for the obit. They were polite and helpful reminding me to update this or that.

At the end he said he had to ask why I was pre planning so young. I lied and said I had family die recently that had nothing prepared and it was a nightmare. And that while I hope to be around for many many more years I've been having health issues so it's best I take care of this for my own peace of mind. I personally didn't think I was suspicious other than my young presence at the funeral home. However when I left and went to shake his hand he shocked me and hugged me instead. Which makes me think he knew that my suicide was a possibility. Idk maybe he was just really friendly because of his type of work.

Anyway I'm glad I have one more thing squared away for my family. I want to make as little work for them as possible since I'm hurting them so much.

Anna

 

[Forever Sleep]

Thank you for sharing your experience. He sounded like a nice man and you covered yourself well I think. I had similar stories in mind when I made my first will. I think I was somewhere around 20. Although, the question never came up for me.

A green burial sounds interesting although, I've always felt like I wanted to be cremated, the same as most of my family. I do intend to pre-pay though, for a direct cremation. It's still incredibly expensive though.

Do you feel more peace of mind getting it sorted? Yes, I do wonder if he suspected at the end there with the hug. He sounded kind.

 

[futurecorpse]

As someone who used to work in the funeral industry, I'd recommend everyone (not just SS peeps) set up a pre-need or at least write down what kind of funeral you want. The grief your family will be going through will be immense and they're not going to be able to make rational decisions when their brain is in a cloud of fog. Cases received include suicide - young and old. It's sad regardless of age because someone was feeling that bad that they decided to ctb. Young people can naturally die and from what I've seen they were like 30-50 something years old. COD was cancer, sepsis, myocardial infarction, etc. I think the funeral director might have suspected you might ctb if you look and sound like a healthy individual. If you're younger than 30, then for me personally I would suspect that you're going to do something because really no one that young makes pre-need arrangements

 

[Kibby]

Honestly this seems like a good idea, thank you for posting this

 

[locked*n*loaded]

It would be a very good idea to memorialize your desires (no embalming, etc) in a legal last will and testament.

 

[Shadows From Hell]

Excellent idea! You covered yourself well.

I was just reading about this burial tree pod where after your death, they put your cremated remains in the pod, and you can become a tree(better than a vegetable).

Tree Burial Pods: An Eco-Friendly Alternative to Traditional Burials

Considering a green farewell? Learn about tree burial pods and other eco-friendly options in our latest blog.

www.betterplaceforests.com

 

[sweetcreep]

oh wow that sounds like such a nice experience. ideally i would love to do something like that so my family doesn't have to stress over my death as much. but it's definitely not in the budget right now. thank you for sharing!

 

[LostLily]

You're brave for doing that. If I did that I'm afraid that they would suspect something because I'm 33 and I still look like a teenager. That and the funeral home I would look into knows my family because that is where my grandparents are buried

 

[J&L383]

Excellent idea! You covered yourself well.

I was just reading about this burial tree pod where after your death, they put your cremated remains in the pod, and you can become a tree(better than a vegetable).

Tree Burial Pods: An Eco-Friendly Alternative to Traditional Burials

Considering a green farewell? Learn about tree burial pods and other eco-friendly options in our latest blog.

www.betterplaceforests.com

My brother and I were just discussing something similar: having our remains turned into human compost (which is a relatively new thing in the US and isn't done in very many places, it takes several months, and is probably around $6,000) and then a tree planted to grow out of it. I said I wanted to become a maple tree so people could make syrup out of me and say how sweet I am.

I met with the funeral home director yesterday to prearrange my burial and storage/ transportation. I am being buried at a green cemetery so it's important that they know in advance that I cannot be embalmed.

The director was incredibly surprised at how young I was. I dressed semi nicely, giving the illusion that I have my shit together. I tried to have a calm and bubbly demeanor. I started by making a joke saying "hopefully your services won't be needed for a looooooooonnngggg time." And continuously we talked about how 40-50 years from now the prices will have changed and the home will have changed hands and all that jazz. We both agreed I would outlive him.

I was able to get a quote of just under $5000 USD if I were to die right now (not including plot which I already paid for and the service.) the meeting took an hour where we discussed if there would be a showing, refrigeration, notifying the grave digger, obituary fees, transportation logistics, shrouds vs coffins, mortuary trusts and so on. I provided my life insurance policy, birth certificate, social security number and some basic info for the obit. They were polite and helpful reminding me to update this or that.

At the end he said he had to ask why I was pre planning so young. I lied and said I had family die recently that had nothing prepared and it was a nightmare. And that while I hope to be around for many many more years I've been having health issues so it's best I take care of this for my own peace of mind. I personally didn't think I was suspicious other than my young presence at the funeral home. However when I left and went to shake his hand he shocked me and hugged me instead. Which makes me think he knew that my suicide was a possibility. Idk maybe he was just really friendly because of his type of work.

Anyway I'm glad I have one more thing squared away for my family. I want to make as little work for them as possible since I'm hurting them so much.

Anna

I've been visiting cemeteries (one of my favorite places to take walks through) and meeting with a funeral home director, also. But it's easier for me since I'm in my 60's. She did say her job is hard at times because December was a busy month and there were some suicides. (He may be on to you). She mentioned that meeting with people and their families and then taking care of their bodies after they die is not for the faint of hearted.

As for whether you had your shit together, just the fact that you're doing this in the first place is indicative of a rational person.

 

[slinkey10]

oh wow that sounds like such a nice experience. ideally i would love to do something like that so my family doesn't have to stress over my death as much. but it's definitely not in the budget right now. thank you for sharing!

Realy depends what country ur in? Death has become a comodity, in the UK u can pay like 1-2K; for a basic death (cremation) which covers everything from picking up the body, storage, crem and ashes given to someone of your choosing etc...

My brother and I were just discussing something similar: having our remains turned into human compost (which is a relatively new thing in the US and isn't done in very many places, it takes several months, and is probably around $6,000) and then a tree planted to grow out of it. I said I wanted to become a maple tree so people could make syrup out of me and say how sweet I am.

I've been visiting cemeteries (one of my favorite places to take walks through) and meeting with a funeral home director, also. But it's easier for me since I'm in my 60's. She did say her job is hard at times because December was a busy month and there were some suicides. (He may be on to you). She mentioned that meeting with people and their families and then taking care of their bodies after they die is not for the faint of hearted.

As for whether you had your shit together, just the fact that you're doing this in the first place is indicative of a rational person.

cemeteries are expensive now - lack of space I guess & for the rich.

 

[The_Hunter]

I said I wanted to become a maple tree so people could make syrup out of me and say how sweet I am.

XD