liz!!!!!
liz <3
- Feb 8, 2023
- 30
last night i managed to talk to him. he has a habit of asking...unhinged questions. i usually just say yes, or mhm, or repeat what he says to make him happy. last night he asked a question he'd asked before. "would you leave me if i cheated on you?" i hesitated, but i still said yes. "even if i did it a lot?" i hesitated again. and then something that never happened before happened. i started to feel like crying. i didn't want him to know, so i just choked it back and closed my eyes. i wasn't sure if i could answer without breaking, so i just asked him not to make me sad. "i'm not...trying to." and then he repeated his question again. i managed to answer him, but i could still feel the tears i tried to hold back falling regardless. i don't know why i got so overwhelmed. i'm becoming more of a crybaby each day. but i'm tired of loving someone who says they love me just to avoid me all the time. i'm starting to feel like he only keeps me around to feel like he has at least one person who loves him the way i do. but i guess i got myself into this situation anyways, right? i just wish i could have a normal relationship again.