my birthday!

[bear_trapped]

i turned 19 today and im honestly surprised i've made it this long. i had always planned to ctb before i turned 18 but i've been trying to be more hopeful for the future so i'm proud of myself for that.

i just feel so lonely and bored all the time. my mom gave me money and took me to get a little cake for myself today after she got off work and i'm really grateful for both of those things, but i just feel really lame compared to other teens that are always going out and doing a bunch of stuff with friends. i spent all day on my phone waiting for my mom to get off just to go to kroger, that was my whole birthday. again i'm happy i got a cake and money, but idk. i realized how friendless i really am after graduating and seeing everyone leave for college. i really need people to hang out with but idk how to meet new people. i'm too shy and my style isn't common at all in my small town. i feel like i'm rotting in my room everyday and i really wanna change that.

all in all, my birthday wasn't bad though. im happy im still here

 

[Rounded Apathy]

Happy day of birth to you. Based only on reading this it sounds like your main issue is lack of community - very valid, but very fixable, especially at such a young age. You mention "small town" - can you move to a more happening place? Consider traveling? The best way for me was always placing myself into completely new environments; school, work, country, etc. You also sign off with "happy im still here" which means you can't feel too badly about things...unlike many of us!

 

[rainbowbright]

Happy birthday

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Glad you're hanging in there. You're in kind of an exciting phase of life if you make some good decisions. I wish I'd busted my ass more when I was your age. I would say hustle, and have hope, if you're in any position to.

 

[Shivali]

Happy birthday