more stupid little issues

[lavenderlilylies]

i told myself that i won't be attending my graduation ceremony unless i get second class honors (3.7-3.8 out of 4.0). my current gpa is 3.65 with less than 10 credits left and a crippling depression. needless to say i'll need a miracle to get there.

for me, i don't want to go regardless, for more reasons than one, but i was willing to put my wants aside and go for my mom's sake if i at least got a gpa i could be proud of. but without it walking that stage would be more like a walk of shame lol.

if i was in a better place it wouldn't be an issue, 3.65 isn't nothing, they'll still acknowledge it as excellence, but i don't want that, i've worked hard for it yet i can't be proud of it. it's embarrassing.

i still don't know how to break it to my mom that i won't be going. it might be a fight. i just can't see myself enjoying or even pretending to enjoy it.

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

Maybe you're being just a little hard on yourself? It will still be seen as excellence, and not many people can say that. You've worked hard and I understand that you are disappointed. But you will miss out for missing it by only a fraction. I'm sorry you feel this way but I'm sure your mom would be proud and I think you can be proud too. I hope you can still celebrate somehow after all the hard work